89. His Weakness (1)

Josh frowned. He realized there was sarcasm hidden behind the girl's words even though the way of speaking caught by his ears had absolutely no hint of annoyance or anger. He didn't know what Ashley was really hiding. Either the girl was no longer angry because she knew the limits of their relationship. Or, she was completely ignoring him.

Their relationship deteriorated after the trip from Paris. And it got worse when his accidental encounter with Ashley's mother happened. Then it got even worse when he broke the appointment with Ashley's parents, and didn't come back at all until today. Without giving any information.

Josh did say that he had some business that required him to go out of town. But he couldn't even be sure whether Ashley believed him, or maybe not.

Either way, the worst thing Josh had done was to lie and never give any news after that.

“Are you angry? Because I didn't come home?”

Ashley snorted with a laugh, “No.”

Then the elevator doors in front of them opened.

Ashley knew she was angry, upset, hurt, disappointed, jealous—but what will she get if she lets out all those emotions?

Things still wouldn't change.

Josh would still see her as an intruder and destroyer of his life. Then she would continue to be in the constant mess of having to get involved to cover up that man’s relationship with his girlfriend. Which gave her no direct benefit at all, except for the torment she could only feel alone.

That's why Ashley was determined to choose to ignore anything about Josh. For her, it would be much better if their distance became very long like this. Never meeting him was much more peaceful than having to meet him and hold back all her feelings desperately.

Ashley took back her shopping bag from Josh and quickly exited the elevator. She didn't look back at all and walked at a brisk pace, as if Josh who walked behind her was nothing more than a ghost to be avoided as much as possible. 

As soon as the door to the apartment opened, she went straight in and let the door close automatically—without bothering to keep it open and wait for Josh. As a result, the door code sounded again a few moments later because Josh, who arrived at the door after it had closed and locked automatically, had to open it himself.

Josh caught up and found Ashley already in the kitchen and was taking out her groceries on the kitchen table.

“Ash,” Josh stood right across from her. They were separated by a considerable distance from the table. But that didn't mean Ashley couldn't hear when Josh called her softly.

Ashley kept her head down and was busy organizing her groceries. She had completely ignored him.

“Ashley,” Josh called out once again. “Can you hear me?”

But Ashley still didn't give any reaction, as if Josh was completely invisible.

“You're ignoring me now?” Josh's voice was slightly raised this time. There was a hint of annoyance in his tone.

Ashley put the last egg into the egg box and closed it. For a moment, she was silent and waited. She hoped that since she didn't respond to anything, it would make Josh fed up and leave her alone. More than that, it would be great if he would leave the house again immediately.

But during the few moments she stayed still, out of the corner of her eye she saw Josh doing the same. He continued to give her a look that she didn't know what to do with as he waited for her.

As she was getting more and more annoyed with Josh's attitude, Ashley finally sighed heavily and decided to speak again.

“Can you just leave me alone?” Ashley raised her face and looked at Josh. “Let's do our own thing like before. That also means, we don't have to make small talk or pretend to want to talk when we don't want to.”

“Why?” Josh tried to remain calm. “I know you're angry. I know I've made so many mistakes. But there's no need to ignore me like this. How can I apologize if you act like this.”

“You don't need to apologize. What are you apologizing for? And, yes, I think I'm more comfortable ignoring you and pretending you don't exist. So just do the same to me.”

Josh shook his head and snorted harshly.

“You're acting like I deserve to be treated like this. I told you I made a lot of mistakes. And I came here to set things straight. But what did I get? You have no idea what I went through to get back here!” Josh exploded his voice. 

He could no longer hold back the resentment that had been festering in his heart. 

Resentment that was actually a buildup of many diverse problems. Not just Ashley's attitude towards him. But now, he was taking it out on her.

Ashley grinned when she heard Josh's anger. The man's face really looked very messed up.

“You, don't need, to apologize,” Ashley repeats her sentence and emphasizes it. But her words sounding very contrasting compared to Josh’s. She spoke in a flat tone without emotion, ”You don't need to come here either. I think what I said is enough to emphasize the boundaries of our relationship.”

After that, she swallowed all the remaining words that still wanted to spew out. But with full awareness she chose to return to silence. Ignoring whatever this jerk did was the most appropriate decision she could ever think of.

“If I could do it, I would also be happy to do it. But what can I do?” Josh was still shouting in a high tone. “You're all pushing me around. Pulling me here and there as you please. Throwing me into a web of trouble that I have no idea how else to get out of! And you—your presence is really ruining my life even more. I don't think you can even realize it. But you're just ignoring me like I don't even exist? Finally, you're really showing that you look down on me and insult me openly!”