Luther

A rush of air fills my lungs, and I gasp, sucking it in; while turning on my side.

Hands hold me down, and I don’t need to ask why; I can feel the motherfucker laughing inside my head.

If I’m being restrained, it means that Lorcan took complete control over me, meaning the prick did something terrible.

It will all come back to me in time; it always does. But each time I wake up after the fact, my memory is fuzzy for a while.

I groan while rolling onto my back.

My family surrounds me, including my grandfather and two of his son’s, Charles, my aunt Tracey’s father, and James, the youngest of Mum’s brothers. If they’re here, then I dread to think what happened this time.

“How bad?” I ask while sitting up in the hospital bed.

This is where I always end up after Lorcan is pushed back. The motherfucker drains most of my energy.

“Really bad,” Dad tells me.

I look down at myself. My bare chest is covered in blood, and I dread to think why. “Care to elaborate?”

By the look on their faces, I’d say Lorcan killed someone again. It wouldn’t be the first time; I doubt it will be the last. The thought makes me sick.

Fuck, I try so hard to keep Lorcan at bay, but it’s not easy. Sometimes, Lorcan takes complete control, and I know he won’t stop until the only thing left of me is the body he inhabits.

“Lorcan took a young girl,” I close my eyes at Leander’s words. “He tortured her, Luther. He tortured her so badly, and not only that; he almost drained her dry of blood.”

I shake my head, shaking away the laughter of my brother within me. Lorcan is evil; there’s no other word for him. I hate that I can’t separate from him, and I hate that he takes pleasure in hurting those I care about.

What I hate more is that I love the son of a bitch. I’d give anything to free him just as he wants and have him here with me, but I can’t. Believe me; I’ve tried many times.

However, when I realise Lorcan has done heinous things, I want nothing more than to kill him!

“Who?”

My family share a look before Mum tells me, “Jenna,”

“Jenna?” I ask for clarification.

Mum nods. “Yes, Jenna. She was out picking herbs when Lorcan swooped in a took her.”

“When Anna told us that Jenna hadn’t returned, we got worried. We tried to track her,” I stare at Lilly as she speaks. Nothing seems real at the moment. “When we couldn’t, and we couldn’t find you either, Mum called grandad.”

“I knew where Lorcan would be the moment Anja called me,” I swallow back the lump in my throat as my grandfather speaks. “Lorcan put up a good fight, and it wasn’t easy pushing him back this time, Luther.”

I shake my head because I don’t give a damn about that right now.

Lorcan took my mate!

No one had any clue that Jenna was my mate because I kept it to myself. I saw the hurt in Jenna’s eyes when I walked away from her, ignoring my wolf’s whimpers to take our mate.

It had nothing to do with Jenna’s Omega status that I didn’t claim her and everything to do with Lorcan.

I knew something like this would happen, but I hoped that acting as though Jenna didn’t exist, it would throw Lorcan off the scent.

I couldn’t have been more wrong.

“What about Jenna? Did Lorcan kill her?” If he killed her, I don’t know what I’ll do.

“No,” Leander shakes his head. “She’ll be fine in a few days. Toby is replenishing her blood, and she just needs some rest.”

I nod my head, trying not to show my true feelings.

“So, when were you going to tell us that Jenna is your mate?”

I roll my neck and relish the crack without making eye contact with my mother. “I’m done here,” I hop down from the bed.

“Luther, we need to talk about this!”

“No, we don’t!” I snap at Dad. “I don’t give a damn if Jenna is my mate; I don’t want her. I don’t want to talk about this again.” I walk away without another word.

If I were any kind of man, I would check on my mate. No one could understand what not being with Jenna is doing to me. A wolf needs their mate; we can’t survive without them. We live a half-life, never fully whole.

But I have to protect Jenna from Lorcan, now more than ever. What he did today is proof that he’ll do anything it takes to take over my life. He hurt my mate by draining her blood! I can’t put her through that again.

I have to make Lorcan believe that Jenna is nothing to me. If I push her away, she’ll be safe. By claiming her, she never will be.

The last thing I want is for Jenna to be hurt again. The amount of strength it’s taken me not to run to her side and beg for forgiveness is crushing me.

After what Lorcan did to her, Jenna is not going to want anything to do with me. She doesn’t know about Lorcan, so she’s going to think that I was the one who did those awful things to her.

It’s for the best, and I hope Jenna will see that one day. There will be someone out there for her, her second chance mate. All I have to do is reject her, and she’ll be able to move. If she’s lucky enough to find her second chance mate, then I wish them all the happiness in the world. I’m not worried about what breaking the mate bond will do to Jenna; I’m not because I know she’s stronger than anyone thinks. I know she’ll be okay.

‘You really are stupid if you honestly believe that,’ My wolf huffs in anger. ‘Jenna is an Omega, and she’s weak. Reject her, and our mate dies!’

I don’t answer Valerian because I don’t want to get into it with him right now. I know that he has a point, and I think deep down, that’s the reason I haven’t rejected Jenna yet.

I’m scared that she might not be as strong as I think she is, and she’ll die. It wouldn’t kill me if Jenna died, but it would weaken me for decades. I can’t afford to be weak when I’m fighting against my brother for survival as it is.

Some would say that I’m crazy for not claiming my mate. Maybe I am, but my instinct to protect Jenna outweighs the need to be with her.

Jenna and I haven’t mated; therefore, I haven’t marked her. Simply put, the longer we’re apart, the quicker the bond will break. I haven’t researched what that could mean for Jenna yet, but I’m hoping it won’t kill her and that she can move on with her life.

Heat and rut will still hit us, and I find it odd that it didn’t happen right after we realised we were mates.

When it does hit, I’m hoping it won’t be too bad. I’ve never once touched Jenna or even come close to it, so that should mean we’ll be okay.

It won’t be as it was for Lilly and Bastian because Jenna isn’t an Alpha female. If heat and rut do hit hard, I’ll handle it. Mum, Lilly and Sara will take care of Jenna. Nothing can go wrong.

‘Keep telling yourself that.’

I scrub my hands over my face with a groan while walking into my room. I flop back onto my bed and look up to the ceiling, ignoring my wolf and his sly comments.

I need to get away from this place and Jenna. I know what Lorcan wants, and I know what the Moon Goddess promised him. I can understand why he’s so angry; anyone would be. But we can’t go on like this. All the push and pull, the fighting and anger are too much.

If I leave, maybe I can finally find a way to give Lorcan what he wants. What he wants is his own body. He feels cheated that his body died in our mother’s womb.

I don’t have a clue why the witch did what she did; no one does. She’d never even met my mother, yet Imelda cast a spell that took my brother’s body.

I don’t yet know how Lorcan and I will be separated if we can be separated. I’ve done years of research on the subject, but I’ve never come back with anything that could help. We need the witch, but she’s gone, and no other can reverse the spell.

My family and I have spoken to a handful of witches to determine if what I’d read was true. Unfortunately, it is accurate, and there’s no way any witch can help us.

Of course, there is a way to draw Lorcan out, but someone else would have to die for Lorcan to take over their body. None of us is willing to allow that to happen. Not only is it morally wrong, but it’s against the laws of nature.

We’re forever going around in circles with this whole thing, and Lorcan is getting stronger by the day. I don’t know how much strength I have left to keep him locked away.

I feel guilty that I have a body and my brother doesn’t. I had thought once or twice about allowing Lorcan to switch places with me. That was until I realised Jenna was my mate.

I turn on my side and stare at the wall. I feel like I’m stuck on a Ferris wheel, forever going around and around but never stopping.

Is a little peace too much to ask for?

‘Give me what I want, and you’ll get peace.’ I sense Lorcan shrugging in my mind.

‘It’s

not that easy, Lorcan. Do you think I like this? Do you think I wouldn’t rather my brother be here with me, Leander, and Lilly the way you always should have been?’

‘You don’t mean that! If you meant it, you wouldn’t have stopped searching for a body for me. I’m done waiting, Luther. I want a body within the next month, or I’m taking yours, and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop me!’

I wish I could say that Lorcan was lying, but he’s not. I can feel myself slipping away little by little as Lorcan takes over. If that happens, my parents will gain the son they believe they lost twenty-five years ago. But sadly, they’d lose me, meaning that this is a no-win situation for my parents.

I have to leave. I need help from my grandfather; only he can guide me on the right path. I don’t want to be a host to my brother’s spirit anymore; I want him gone. But there’s something inside that compels me to give Lorcan what he wants and needs.

Nothing is ever as it seems, and I can’t see this working. But I have to try, even if it kills me.

‘If you don’t help me, then it will kill you. Once you’re dead, I’ll take great pleasure in tearing apart you mate. On second thought, maybe I will claim her for my own. She’ll never know the difference.’

I growl, causing Lorcan to laugh, and I’d love nothing more than to kill him with my bare hands right now! He knows how to get to me, and since he knows that Jenna is my mate, he’ll use her against me at every turn.

Goddess, why are you doing this to me?

Please help me protect Jenna, if nothing else.