Chapter 4: Between Duty and Desire

Chapter 4: Between Duty and Desire

“Is this your first day here? And what’s your name?” he asked, clearly curious.

“Joanna. I just started Monday, working in the CEO’s office,” I answered, still trying to calm the butterflies in my stomach.

“Oh, so you’re Justin’s new secretary,” Dusty said, nodding knowingly.

I forced a smile. “Yes…”

Dusty raised an eyebrow. “Lucky you. Miss Leni didn’t seem too thrilled when Justin got a new secretary around her age.”

My brow furrowed. “Miss Leni? What do you mean?”

Dusty hesitated, then quickly said, “Nothing, forget I said anything.”

If we were closer, I’d have grilled him for details. But with only ten minutes left of my break, I politely excused myself.

Back at the office, I noticed Justin’s door was slightly ajar. Curiosity took over, and I quietly peered inside.

My heart nearly stopped.

There was Justin, sitting in his swivel chair, and in his lap—there was a woman. Their faces were so close it was obvious what was happening.

They were kissing.

Even if I couldn’t see the woman’s face clearly, I knew. It was Lenita. My best friend.

Tears flooded my eyes again as I covered my mouth, trying to muffle my sobs.

They didn’t notice me. I could even hear soft moans coming from the office.

This wasn’t just a kiss anymore.

If only I had the money, I’d have filed for annulment myself. But love like this was expensive—and unattainable.

Before I knew it, exhaustion claimed me, and I fell asleep right there on the floor.

A sharp voice woke me.

“Joanna! You’re not paid to sleep here.”

I blinked awake to find Lenita standing before me, arms crossed, looking as cold as ever. Justin was right behind her, wearing his usual poker face.

“Sorry, ma’am. It won’t happen again,” I muttered.

Lenita narrowed her eyes. “Justin’s going to walk you to the parking lot. Don’t fall asleep again, or else.”

I lowered my gaze, the pain twisting inside my chest. I wondered—what day is it now? Am I even prepared for this? I hadn’t brought anything for my period.

Justin and Lenita left the office, and I made my way to the bathroom.

Thankfully, the CEO’s office had its own bathroom on the thirty-third floor.

That’s when I confirmed it.

My period had started.

Sitting on the toilet, I sighed deeply, the cramps twisting my insides mercilessly.

I didn’t know anyone here well enough to ask for help—like someone to buy me a pad.

I’d have to tough it out until Justin returned.

But what if he catches me leaving the office? What if he’s angry?

I clenched my fists, fighting back tears.

Suddenly, a knock on the door startled me.

“Joanna, are you okay?” Justin’s voice was soft, concerned.

I hesitated, then whispered, “I’m fine.”

A pause. Then he said, “If you need anything, just tell me.”

My heart fluttered at his unexpected kindness.

But deep down, I knew this was just the beginning of a complicated mess.

The kind that could either break us… or bring us closer than ever.

The parking lot was almost empty when Justin finally dropped Lenita off, but by the time he returned to the car, I was already freezing. Damn it—I forgot my jacket. The cold wind pierced through the thin fabric of my skirt, chilling my bare back, making me shiver. Waiting for him felt like an eternity.

And the worst part? No one was around to help, and I had no way to cover myself. I crossed my arms tightly, trying to warm up, biting my lower lip in frustration.

“Sir…” I managed to call softly, but the word still felt awkward, unnatural rolling off my tongue. Why did I have to call him “Sir” all the time? I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye, hoping for some kind of reaction. He turned his head briefly but didn’t say a word. Typical.

I swallowed hard. How do I tell him? The embarrassment was suffocating. It’s a girl thing—these things are just hard to say out loud. But I couldn’t stand it any longer.

“Can I go out?” I asked hesitantly, voice barely above a whisper.

Justin frowned, his brows furrowing as he finally gave me his full attention. “Why?”

There it was. The question I dreaded. He always wanted to know why. Because it’s working hours, because he’s the boss, because—because I was trying not to die of embarrassment, that’s why.

“Uhh… well…” I stumbled, words failing me completely. “Uhh…”

Justin’s patience snapped. “What, Joanna? I don’t have time for your—” His sharp tone cut through me, making my cheeks burn with a mix of frustration and hurt. I was trying to talk to him respectfully, but he was still so cold. Yet with Lenita, he was all sweetness. What the hell? Am I not his wife?

“I just need to buy some napkins! I’m soaked!” I shot back, narrowing my eyes at him in defiance. A full minute passed with no response from him, so I pushed harder.

“Are you going to let me go or not?!”

For a moment, his cold, indifferent mask slipped, replaced by a tone harsher than ever. “Fine.”

I didn’t say another word and started to open the door, but suddenly his hand grabbed mine. My heart skipped a beat, confused by the sudden contact. What the hell did he want now? I looked at him, eyebrows raised.

“What? You want me to buy it for you? Command me around while I’m outside?” I snapped, trying to hide the tiny flutter inside me that his touch ignited.

Justin stayed silent for a beat, then his voice dropped low, almost indifferent. “You have blood stains on your skirt.”

I bit my lip hard, cheeks aflame. Of all the things to notice, why that? Why had I let this happen? How many times had I embarrassed myself in front of him? This was definitely the worst.

I wanted to blame him—maybe Lenita had been the reason for my predicament, maybe they were messing around while I waited alone in the cold. Should I remind him that time is gold? That he should be back in the office instead of flirting with his mistress while his wife suffers in silence? But no, I didn’t have the courage. Besides, what if he left me seven years ago because of Lenita? I’d never gotten any news about that woman after he left. The timing was just… cruel. And with Katastrophe needing me more than ever, it was just bad timing all around.

Justin’s voice softened almost too quietly for me to hear. “I can’t let you go looking like that.”

I pretended I didn’t hear, not ready to admit how much that small gesture of concern meant. If only I had been braver before, shown him the truth about the stains back when it all started—maybe things would be different now. Maybe it wouldn’t have ended like this. Maybe they wouldn’t be together now. Maybe… we would be.

But the past was the past, and I was trapped in the cold present.

“Stay here. I’ll buy them for you.” And just like that, he turned and walked away, leaving me alone with my tangled feelings.

Sighing, I watched his back disappear toward the store. What the hell was going on with him? One minute he was cold and harsh, the next he was making sweet, thoughtful gestures that made my heart race. He was such a tease—always leaving me hanging like this.

When he returned, my eyes nearly popped out of my head.

“Why did you buy so many?” I asked, staring at the three massive paper bags overflowing with different brands of napkins sitting on my desk.

Justin scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. “I didn’t know which brand you use, so I bought everything.”

I bit my lip, trying to stop the smile from spreading across my face. That idiot was making me weak. I quickly averted my eyes to hide how touched I was.

“Any brand will do,” I whispered. “Thanks.”

He just nodded and went back to his office, leaving me to my embarrassed gratitude. I grabbed my bag and headed straight to the restroom.

By the time work was over and the office emptied out, I was still uneasy—not because I was going home, but because of the problem waiting for me. The stains weren’t just on my skirt anymore. They’d ruined my underwear too. And I was beyond mortified.

To make matters worse, my phone was dead, and the company line was restricted to business calls only. I couldn’t even call Katastrophe for help. Damn it. How unlucky could I get?

I considered calling Justin, but he’d already bought me the napkins—I didn’t want him to think I was being a nuisance. Again.

I stared at the paper bags again, wondering if I could somehow use one to cover the stains at my back. A quick glance at the glass walls confirmed my worst fear—there was no way I could hide the mess. The stains were everywhere—big and small blotches scattered like a cruel joke. I sank into my chair, defeated, deciding I’d just have to wait until it got dark and hope no one noticed.

To be continued...