Chapter 6 - Strawberry Shake

Sundays are my self-care/ self love days. That means no boyfriends, no commitments and most definitely no best friends. It is a day all about me, for me; I take the day to do what I want to do.  I do what makes me happy.

That can be anything from taking a long nap, to getting my nails done or going people watching in the park.

Today I am going on a solo picnic date. I have my grilled chicken and ham sandwiches packed, in my basket. I also have a nice fruit bowl situation going on. And to drink I have my mother’s famous pink lemonade, all I need is a nice strawberry shake for desert. I love strawberry shakes, I’m not too picky about where I get it, as long as it’s the flavor I like.

I am driving to the nearest McDonald’s in my area. The picnic spot I want to go to is 44 minutes from Pretoria. And I don’t want to waste time driving around Pretoria. I am going to Bronkhorspruit Dam for my solo date, I’m so excited. It’s so beautiful and peaceful out there.  

I drive up to the drive-through at McDonald’s and wait for my turn to order.

“Good morning welcome to McDonald’s may I take your order please” A lady says on the when it’s my turn.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                          

“Hi, may please have one strawberry shake please.” I say to the mike.

“Okay, would you like anything else?” She asks after a beat.

“No, that’s all” I declare.

“Okay, please drive to the next window. Thank you” She says and I drive to the next window.

I get there and pay for my shake and drive on to the pickup window.  When I look up to take my shake, my eyes collide with Leo’s.  He’s staring at me stunned, recovers quickly when I look at him. He hands me the cup through the window.

My hand freezes halfway through to taking the shake from him. I feel my heart beat faster. I almost don’t want to make contact with him, suddenly something as simple as taking a shake from a window has become an impossible task. I take a deep breath and reach out the rest of the way and take the drink.

“Hi” I finally say. Why do I feel like this? I’ve known him for over 5 years and I have never felt this way. Why am I shaky around him all of a sudden?

“Hi, have a great day.” He says when I place the drink in my cup holder.

“You too” I say driving away.

40 minutes later I arrive at the picnic spot; I am feeling happy and renewed. All my stress and tension gone. It feels so good to be in nature and switch off.

I park my car and get my stuff out of the car. I look around at the beauty that is around me. I am in awe of the amazing mountain in front of me and the vast water stretching beyond. I smile happy I did this; it is so beautiful out here.

The smell of the water and the warm touch of the sun make me so happy. I walk toward the water to find a nice spot to lay out my blanket and relax.

I find a great place under a tree. There is just enough shade to be cool. I lay out my picnic blanket and set up so I can get comfortable.

I lie down and enjoy the view. There are families, couples and singles like me taking advantage of the good weather.

I lie on my back and close my eyes for a moment. I smile softly. I feel good. I let my mind drift and the first thing that pops into my mind is Leo’s smile.

I let myself explore that. Why am I thinking about him?

Leo

“How are you feeling my guy?”  Zach says smiling at me from across the kitchen island. He’s in a particularly good mood.

He called me this morning before I left for work to tell me he’s coming over tonight. He said he wants to spend some quality time with his best mate. Me.

I got home 2 hours ago, I’m busy making the kids dinner and this fool is sitting across from me acting weird.

“I’m good, you seem extra good today.” I say smiling because he has this stupid, cheesy smile on his face.

“I am, indeed I am feeling extra good.” He says and taps me on the shoulder.

“What the hell, are you going to tell me what’s going on?” I ask, I can’t take his weirdness.

“I my friend found out that Super man is indeed afraid of kryptonite.” He says and actually has the nerve to look thoughtful.

“What?”

“Cole, the school clone/ Mr universe/ Mr everything perfect, is not so perfect.”  He says and my heart skips at the mention of Golden’s boyfriend.

I know where this is going. I made the mistake of telling Zach that I have a crush on her once and he has been trying to get me to ask her ever since.

“Oh!” I say and move away from the kitchen. I make sure the kids sit down and eat, before I take a deep breath and head back to Zach. I hand him a plate of food and get my own.

“Oh! That’s all you have to say?” He says actually looking hurt.

“What do you want me to say?” I ask and not really interested in the answer.

“Well I was hoping you would be a little more interested to know that our “it” boy is very insecure about his relationship with Golden.” He says proud of the information he’s giving me.

“Okay and what’s that got to do with me?” 

“That means you have a chance man.” He says his voice getting louder.

I laugh shocked at his declaration. I laugh from the deepest part of my stomach. I haven’t laughed like this in a long time.

“Wow, bro. I knew you had mad love for me but I didn’t know it went this deep.” I say laughing even harder at the thought of what he just said.

“You laugh but I know what I’m talking about. All Cole has is popularity and his parent’s money.”

“And all I have is problems” I say when the laughter finally subsides.

“You have a great heart, you work hard and you are one of the best people I know.” He says a serious look on his face.

“Thank you for the vote of confidence my friend but Golden is not for me. ”  I say the words breaking my heart but it’s true.

Later in bed

Zach’s words ring in my head. I have had a crush on Golden for over 4 years now and I never allowed myself to imagine what it would be like to actually share space with her. I can barely look her in the eyes, I can’t imagine going on a date with her.

“Zach is crazy” I say into the darkness.