CHAPTER TWENTY 'False judgement'

Violet felt needles enter and come out of her numb body. Pitch black was her sight even though she felt she was wide awake. 

She felt the needle enter her head and this time, it made her breath hitch and her eyes opened. 

She squinted her eyes quickly to filter out the light but it did nothing so she shut her eyes. 

Lady Demi looked at her with a sigh. “That was fast. I wasn't expecting you to wake up so quickly.”

Violet held the woman above her by her neck and held her right hand, tight so she wouldn't be pricked with a needle. All this while, with her eyes closed. 

Lady Demi gasped for air. “H—how'd you get so strong? You could barely breathe before.”

Violet felt something prick her neck and her hold on the woman loosened and she fell into a deep sleep.

Lady Demi let out a sigh of relief and turned to face Lilly Agatha Senora.

“Thank you, your grace.”

Lilly entered the room fully and took a look at the patient on the bed.

“How is she?”

“Honest?”

“Yes.” Lilly said.

“She has no heart yet she breathes. There's no treatment I can give to her to make her become better. Right now, she's basically a living zombie. She cannot be capable of emotional bond nor sense of what is wrong and right.”

“Then kill her. That would save us and her from future disasters.”

Lady Demi looked up to Lilly, her eyes glistened with tears. “Don't you feel pity for her?”

Lady Demi pulled the covers down so Lilly could take a look of Violet her well defined scars. No parts of her body were spared from burns and terrifyingly deep marks.

Lilly turned away, her nose scrunched up in disgust.

“Cover her back up. I can't bare to look at her ugly body.”

Lady Demi flinched.

“B—b—but she's your daughter. I-i know I barely leave my residence but I'm certain she's your daughter. Is she not?”

“What does that have to do with anything? Kill her! That way, we won't have to deal with another misfortune.” Lilly turned to face the healer seriously, “Know this, she is bad luck. You cannot save her, no one can. Even if you do, she'll end up killing herself. No one wants to be live with a face and body as ugly as hers!”

“I'll still save her, because that's my responsibility as a healer.”

Lilly scoffed, “She'll kill you. Without my help she would have suffocated you to death.”

“No. She was just scared, it's a reflex considering all the trauma trapped in her body, it'd take forever to heal!”

“I still don't agree to her living. She doesn't have a heart, she'll slip.”

“Neither do you have a heart!”

Lilly froze, taking in what the healer just said.

“What did you say?”

“If you insist your own daughter doesn't have a heart then you must be make of stone. How could you call her ugly and heartless with all the scars you see on her body?”

Lilly took in the healer harsh words.

“Having a heart isn't about a pumping organ in the chest. It's about consideration for others. At least, Violet has that. Although she had her hands around my neck, she did not hurt my windpipe. Then she restrained my hand so I didn't hurt her. She was scared.”

Lady Demi looked at Lilly and lifted her leg to kick her. Instinctively, Lilly held the healer by her foot and tossed her across the room.

“What are you doing?” She whisper-yelled.

Lady Demi flipped over in the air and landed on the ground safely.

“You, just did the same thing Violet did. Except, you weren't so gentle.” Lady Demi chuckled before heading back to the bed where Violet was laying down.

Lilly frowned, resisting the urge to explode while holding her fist.

“I'll take care of her from now on so you don't have to worry about a single thing.” 

Lilly turned to leave and Lady Demi smiled, “One more friendly reminder, don't touch her.”

Lilly tightened her fist and headed out begrudgingly. 

Demi had given her a warning.

That old fox had given her a warning. She was indeed pissed but she felt powerless. 

She'd taken Demi's place as the seventh keeper of Thestryn. If not for Thea's help then..

Back then, she'd had no chance at all.

But now it was different.

How could Lady Demi warn her to back away from her own daughter? Violet was her own offering, she had every right to make decisions concerning her.

Violet was especially dangerous at this point. She would have to die.

She couldn't convince the council but if she convinced the queen to sentence Violet to death, their power would be enough to get rid of the looming darkness— Violet.

Without any more hesitation, she took off for the manor.

Unexpectedly, the queen was reported to be taking a rest. Not wanting to be a nuisance, she went to her residence to rethink creative ways to get rid of Violet.

***

Violet was soaking in the spring after the first sight of dawn. She felt no need for it but Lady Demi had convinced her to bath in it, saying it'd help to warm up her body temperature and help her sight get used to the light.

Boring.

She knew the healer had also sent her to the spring to help her heal her scars but it wasn't certain — Lady Demi didn't want to feed her false hopes.

Violet stared down at her rough legs. It looked nothing like the old her but she mind.

At least, the scars engraved in her skin affirmed the insane world in her head. She laughed at the ugly older-looking woman staring back at her in the water.

Three years ago, she didn't imagine she'd look like this. Ugly and barely alive.

It ate her from the inside.

Even if she wanted to die, she hoped she'd at least die pretty like Queen Thea did. But now..

“Why are you thinking of looking pretty again, Violet? You know.. you were never pretty.” A voice cackled in her head.

“Who are you to lecture me about looks? You don't even have a body to torment me with!” Violet irritatingly snapped.

The voice whimpered, “You're bullying me again!”

Violet sighed.

Those voices.. They never left her alone. She could never get used to them.

“Hey! Why are bullying Tiffany again? It's not her fault she doesn't have a body! At least its better than having such a ugly body!” Alice yelled back.

Violet covered her ears with her hands, “Shut up! You're saying garbage!”

Tiffany and Alice busted into a fit of giggles.

“She's so easy to piss off!”

“She's so easy to make insecure.” Alice laughed loudly.

“Are you okay, Yak Ann Sinora?”

Violet noticed that the healer was one of the few people to call her by her real name, without attaching her to a convenient name because of her purple hair and eyeballs.

She blushed, somewhat embarrassed. Lady Demi must have heard her talking to herself.

Although the healer had caught her on several occasions, she'd encourage her to say positive things to herself. 

In fact, Lady Demi had taught her to look in her reflection and say positive things to her about her appearance and body. 

Even though, she wondered if the healer would hate her if she kept doing that. Not that she really cared, she was just curious. So many years at change, she had died but somehow managed to clench onto the body.

She felt it was for a reason.

Her memories were muddled but she somehow remembered how pretty she used to be and her powers. 

Right now, she feared using her powers — If she had any, she did not try to know how much. Because she feared it'd backfire. 

She had so many traumas surrounding her powers and she feared she had really become a monster.

Her mind wandered to a past event. The time she was at the snow-covered mountain.

Anya had appeared and said, 

“But your mother disagreed and decided you'd have to receive one more punishment until you'll be forgiven.”

She'd receive the last punishment, was she still not forgiven?

Rage filled her body as she remembered the conversation between her mother and the healer when she'd just woken up.

Flashback**

“She has no heart yet she breathes. There's no treatment I can give to her to make her become better. Right now, she's basically a living zombie. She cannot be capable of emotional bond nor sense of what is wrong and right.”

“Then kill her. That would save us and her from future disasters.”

“Don't you feel pity for her?”

“Cover her back up. I can't bare to look at her ugly body.”

“B—b—but she's your daughter. I-i know I barely leave my residence but I'm certain she's your daughter. Is she not?”

“What does that have to do with anything? Kill her! That way, we won't have to deal with another misfortune.” 

“Know this, she is bad luck. You cannot save her, no one can. Even if you do, she'll end up killing herself. No one wants to be live with a face and body as ugly as hers!”

“I'll still save her, because that's my responsibility as a healer.”

Lilly scoffed, “She'll kill you. Without my help she would have suffocated you to death.”

“No. She was just scared, it's a reflex considering all the trauma trapped in her body, it'd take forever to heal!”

“I still don't agree to her living. She doesn't have a heart, she'll slip.”

***

She thinks I'm a monster.

They think I'm a monster and they're so right!!

“Yak Ann!” Lady Demi said a loudly, snapping Violet from her thoughts.

“Did you say something?”

“Yes. I said many things but you didn't seem to be paying any attention.”

Violet turned to face the older woman, “Sorry.”

“Thank you for apologizing. I hope you can pay attention in future despite your lecture in here.” The healer gestured to her head and Violet cracked a smile.

“How are you feeling this morning? Tell me everything. Including the details.”

“Well..” Violet let out a sigh as the first morning sun started to let out its shine. 

Violet squinted her eyes from how bright the sun was. 

“It's okay.” Lady Demi assured, sitting on the rock opposite of her to give her enough privacy and space.

“I.. can't feel anything,” Violet ran her finger through her arms. “Except rage. I know because I feel it pulsating through my arms.”

“Why do you think of before the feeling occurs?”

Violet hesitated, “Her.” 

“Who? Be specific.”

“Lilly Agatha Sinora.”

Lady Demi hummed, “Sounds to me like you're sad because your mother abandoned you. Whether or not you did wrong does not matter to you. You feel like she should have showed some sort of sympathy and stayed by your side despite your flaws because you would do the same thing for anyone else.”

“No. I'm not sad, I just hate her and want to kill her.”

Lady Demi eyes glistened with tears, “Well, that took an unexpected turn.”

“I'm serious, healer. I can't process any feelings. My body is only capable of judging things from the end result. I want revenge for every single one of my scars.”

“You've been hurt so much. There are many contributors to your scars. Who do you hold the greatest grudge towards?”

“Lilly Agatha Sinora.”

“Why?”

“False judgement. She made me think I was responsible for the past Queen's death but when I conversed with the voices in my head, I understood that I was naive and weak. I didn't fight enough to get my voice to be heard. I could have had a better life today if i'd trusted myself better.”

The healer nodded, “I'm glad you've recognised that. Trusting yourself is really the only key to success.”

Violet simply stared.

“Do you need more time in the water or..” Lady Demi trailed off.

“I think I've had quite enough. The sun is blinding!”