CHAPTER 17: THE CONFINED QUEEN

I’m not a prisoner.

That’s what I keep telling myself, but I know very well that I'm just lying to myself, especially this time that I hear the electronic lock click behind me.

“You need to rest,” Xander had said this morning as he kissed my forehead and handed me a schedule like I was some sort of obedient little house wife.

Remembering it again now, I scoff.

A “calm” day, according to him was yoga at ten, vitamins at eleven, prenatal appointment at two and a nap by four.

God, this man's version of care feels very much like a trap with spiky ropes.

I stare out the window of my room with my arms folded over my chest---- which by the way is a very uncomfortable pose for a pregnant woman, so I pull my arms down immediately.

The city pulsing below me looks just like a world I used to belong to, a world where I listened to patients, and carried out surgeries...

Life was good then; it was dull and plain, but good.

But now, even my thoughts feel as if they're being monitored, both by whoever's trying to kill me and Xander.

There are still guards just outside my bedroom---- who knows if he's doubled them now---- his house assistant, Camille constantly watches me like I might bite through a window and jump out to freedom.

As for Reed, well... I haven't seen him for a while but I suppose it's because he's Xander's PA; so he must be too busy with handling and arranging Xander's schedules.

And Xander?

He’s too busy buying loyalty and silencing headlines to notice that I’m slowly losing myself in this goddamn cage of a penthouse.

“Miss Foster?” Camille knocks once and opens the door before I answer.

I glare at her. “That’s not how knocking works.”

She smiles at me, but her smile is too tight for me to take it to be really genuine.

“Mr. Knight wanted to remind you that your nutritionist is coming at noon.”

“Perfect. I’ll make sure to breathe accordingly.”

She ignores the sarcasm, probably already used to it by now.

However as soon as she leaves, I reach under the couch cushion and pull out the cheap burner phone I had bought last week.

I don't have a phone anymore because it had fallen down that day I got attacked by the two men at the lobby.

But Xander refused to get me another one, saying I'll just use it to escape.

So I had one of Xander’s lower- ranked security guards------- Milo who's sweet, new, and just naive enough for me to 'convince'------ smuggle it in after I faked a breakdown and cried into his shirt about needing “music” to relax.

He’d been too flustered and shy to question me about it.

So now, I scroll to the only number in the contacts list.

LUCY, an investigative Reporter on NY Weekly.

I remember that her slogan is 'Trust No One.'

She and I met after she'd snuck into my room at the hospital when the doctor had gone out for some documents and Xander was screaming at someone at the corridor.

She'd written her number on my palm and told me to call her if I wanted to get help and know everything I needed to know.

Yes, she was a stranger and yes, I shouldn't trust a reporter, but Xander wasn't telling me anything either.

And I'd already made up my mind to give her the information I already knew so she could use it to dig up more for me.

So now I text her: >>> Is the meeting still on?

She replies almost immediately: >>> Yes in ten minutes. Meet me at 7:14 Cafe express, don’t be late.

I hide the phone back in its spot, pull on a long coat, and grab a pair of oversized sunglasses.

It doesn't take me long to sneak out, after pulling the same trick I had pulled on Reed on Milo, and soon I reach the café.

The café is small and tucked away between a bodega and a failing bookstore, and it smells like burnt espresso.

Trying to Ignore the horrible smell, I slide into the booth by the window and wait for Lucy to arrive, feeling my nerves coil in my stomach.

Lucy arrives wearing sunglasses, hoodie and... a lot of attitude.

She looks to be around her mid- thirties, and is chain- smoking a candy- scented vape.

However when she sees me, she eyes my belly and immediately pockets the vape, silently giving respect to my unborn children.

“You’re late,” she says, sitting across from me.

“You’re the one that arrived later,” I counter and she gives me a grin.

However I'm in no mood for pleasantries so I slide the flash drive I'd been holding on to across the table.

“That's Clinic security logs, employee emails and everything I could get from the clinic without tripping an alarm.”

Her smile fades as she looks down at the flash drive now in front of her and takes it in her hands.

"You know this makes you a target, right?”

“I’ve been a target since the moment that sperm hit my cervix.”

Lucy coughs on her palm. “Jesus.”

I shrug. “It’s true.”

She nods slowly, quickly pocketing the drive.

“I’ll verify what I can, then give the answer to you tonight.”

My eyebrows raise up in surprise, "You can work that fast?"

She shrugs and smiles again, "I can."

------------------

When I return to the penthouse, Xander is waiting in the living room.

He takes one look at my face and narrows his eyes immediately.

“You went out.”

“I didn’t know I needed permission to breathe fresh air.”

“You’re carrying my child. You don’t get to vanish without security.”

I toss my bag onto the couch. “I’m not your hostage, Xander.”

“No,” he says coolly, walking toward me, “you’re worse. You’re a woman I can’t seem to control— and it’s making me lose my damn mind.”

He crowds me, and I hate how my body reacts.

My pulse skitters, my skin heats up,... Hell it's been like this since that damn kiss.

I don't say anything to him and just stare at him, then he adds.

"I won’t let you destroy yourself… or our children.”

He says it that way, but he's not sounding angry or anything, he's just staring at me darkly.

God help me, I want him, even now, when I know better than believe him in any way.

Suddenly he brushes a strand of hair from my cheek and I hold my breath, not flinching but not leaning into his hands either.

Then he drops his hand and walks away.

_

_

_

It’s almost midnight when I get the call with my burner phone and I get excited when I see Lucy's name pop up on the screen.

However when I answer the call, it's not Lucy on the other end.

The voice I'm hearing sounds breathless and panicked.

“She’s gone. Lucy’s gone.”

“What? Who's this?”

“Her work partner. She didn’t show up to the office to show me what we were to work on and her apartment’s been trashed. Everything device she has is wiped. Laptop, hard drives, files. Everything!”

My knees buckle, and I slump onto the bed, my breath coming out in shallow gasps.

“She told me… she told me she had something huge,” the voice continues.

“That she was going to blow open the story, but...”

The person cuts off and begins sobbing and my own hand flies to my stomach.

The babies are quiet, so quiet.

“Do the police know?”

“They think she took off, but I don’t. I think someone made her disappear.”

Suddenly the line goes dead and I wonder what happened to the person.

I try calling back, but it goes straight to voicemail.

I shudder and drop the phone.

... Lucy tried to help me, and now she’s gone.

And now her partner is...

I don't finish my thoughts and rush, stumbling into the bathroom, immediately turning on the tap and splash water on my face.

And when I look into the mirror, I can't hold it down anymore and gag, throwing up all over the sink.

I'm scared, I'm really scared.

No where's safe anymore, I need to leave here.