13

Lana’s POV

“No.”

“No?”

I sat up on the bed

“I… I can’t do it,” I said, a lump growing in my throat. “This is a bad idea.”

He sat up and leaned forward, a blank look on his face.

“Why? Because you don’t want to hurt him?” Paul asked.

“No. It’s not that. It’s… There is no need for us or me to force him to like me back.”

Paul chuckled. “Who says he doesn’t?”

“What?”

“I see the way he acts around you. Drake cares for you but that door to his feelings is locked. He gets protective of you, he gets jealous, I've seen him get jealous when he doesn’t know it, when it concerns you.”

In shock, I scooted closer to him and grabbed his closest hand. He needed to tell me more of what he meant.

“Tell me what you know.”

Paul chuckled again. “You have no idea… Drake threatened every loser who came close to you. He made sure no guy dared ask you out. When I asked him why he keeps doing that, he told me he doesn’t want you getting hurt, but I know the truth and if you want to see that for yourself, try this.”

It couldn't be true. Paul was lying. He had to be lying. Paul didn't do any of the things he said.

"You don't believe me, right?" He laughed. "Even I don't believe it too because one moment he says you're a sister he has to protect, when he doesn't even act this way toward our sisters when it comes to boys, the next he is being jealous of the men around you."

My heart was rejoicing. Even though the circumstance was bad right now, my heart was in full glee. Paul felt jealousy when I am around other guys. This was like a dream come true.

"So, I still think you need to confess your feelings to him. Talk things out and if it doesn't work, use me as a boyfriend or new male best friend. Paul is a jealous mother fucker, and he will do everything to get you back even as a friend. All in all, he needs to learn a lesson about taking what isn't his."

I stared deeply into his eyes, thinking over what he had said. If this could work, so many things would happen. One of them is getting my heart broken, another is getting hurt, another would be getting a positive reaction or end game from everything. But I was scared. I was scared of ruining my bond with him. I didn't problems but for the fact that he hurt me because of that loser Nina, I was ready to get back at him.

"Okay. I'll do it."

Paul smirked and placed his hand on my thigh then squeezed. I swallowed at the contact, remembering that I had a physical attraction to the man before me. I wondered if he knew, and I hoped he didn't because it would be embarrassing. 

"That's my girl." Paul sat up and took his phone then typed something on it. "First thing first, you need to have a talk with Drake. Confess your feelings and tell him how you feel about him liking Nina. Hit his conscience then if he rejects you, come to me and in a week, we soft launch but before that."

My back straightened and a tingly sensation went through my spine down to my core as Paul’s gaze softened on me. There was something in his eyes that set my body on some type of heat, making me shift on the bed.

"We need to practice our intimacy." He came closer and took my hand then brought it to his lips. He kissed the back of my hand. "You can always say no, babe. I want us to be comfortable with each other before we start dating because we need to show affection before going public. Drake has made the media know he has an interest in Nina, so that's an opening for me to do whatever I want. People know me as someone who shows off his woman and I want you to be prepared for our relationship."

I swallowed as his lips brushed my skin with every word he said. The sensation of his soft lips moving sent a warmth through my body and to my nether regions. I hated what my body was doing to me. It betrayed my head, and I needed to stop it.

"I want you make you feel wanted, Lana and I will make you feel wanted no matter what happens." 

The more I looked into his eyes, the more I saw something darker and... primal? Whatever it was, it made me feel a hot sensation between my legs.

"Are you ready?" He whispered. 

+++

After my conversation with Paul, I went downstairs to throw our food packs away. The food had been delicious, and I was glad he bought some because I was going to eat some cornflakes earlier. This was an ingredient household and sometimes it was rare to find already cooked food at home.

On getting to the kitchen, I saw Drake with Nina. The presence in the kitchen was nauseating and when they saw me, the feeling increased, followed by anger when I remembered how Drake had spoken to me because of her.

I ignored their gaze and walked over to the trash can which was close to them. I dumped the packs into the trash and went over to the sink where I washed my hands and wiped it dry. I turned to leave, only to stop when Nina walked past me and out the kitchen.

"Lana."

I held my breath at the sound of my name. What did he want?

I wanted to turn around, to give him the chance but I felt I would not be able to, especially knowing what I had to do, which could probably make him even more mad.

"Can you please turn around?"

Every indication in his tone told me he was still angry with me. Somehow, I had a feeling this was my chance to say what I had to say seeing that he was still harboring the anger from earlier. At least for now, he would get angry for two things at once. I just needed courage or boost in the right direction to say what I had to say.

I took a deep breath and slowly turned around. I faced him but was looking away from him, my interest was on the glass of water he was holding.

"Let me get straight to the point." He paused and took a sip out of his glass of water. "I want you to explain to me why you don't like Nina and don't act like you don't because I know you do, Lana. Why would you say something like that about her. Listen, I understand that you care for me but there are limits to things. I really like her, and you should let me be with her however I want. If she cheated, that is not my business because I have equally cheated on my exes too. Judging her based on that when you never once judged me for that is very pick me-ish, Lana and it's kind of disappointing."

I clenched my hands hard as anger flowed through me. I was seeing red and that was the last thing I wanted to be seeing or feeling. I wanted to think with a clear head, but he was making it so hard. Who told him that I didn't hate how he was to the women he dated? It was something I was scared of if he eventually liked me back and we dated. I was scared he would also cheat on me. How dare he call me a pick-me when that girl he was with was the main pick-me.

"Give Nina a chance. Paul has no problems with me dating her because we have dated each of our exes. Stay out of my business and we won't have problems. I also won't apologize for yelling at you because you were being irrational and---"

"Stop!" I said at the top of my voice. "Stop, Drake. I... Enough."

I finally looked him in the eyes. He looked so different. That fondness he had for me was gone, there were no signs of remorse or anything that showed me that he cared for me about this issue.

"You want to know why I am like this?" I walked over to where he stood and stopped a foot away from him. I bit the inside of my cheek to hold myself from crying. I could feel my eyes beginning to burn but I was going to be headstrong and not shed a single tear for him to see.

"Do you want to know why I am acting this way over her? Over whatever this is," I said and pressed the tip of my pointer finger to his chest. "For years, Drake. I have had feelings for you."

His eyes widened at the statement and then he took a step back as his mouth opened from shock.

"Yes. I have been crushing on you for so long. My feelings for you have grown so much that I get jealous. It hurts to see you say you actually have feelings for someone. when you don't just develop feelings for women you have been with. So, yes. I got jealous and angry and lashed out. I am sick and tired of pretending to your face about this. All I ever wanted from you was to be loved and liked back but I don't think that is ever happening."

I closed my mouth once I was done speaking. My throat was beginning to hurt from the bottled emotions inside me. My heart was pounding so hard, I was certain that he could hear the beats. I kept my eyes on his face to gauge every emotion he was passing through from my confession. 

"Are you crazy?" He asked and walked to the side.

His question broke my heart. What was he trying to say to me?

"Lana..." He chuckled. "Are you...wow, I really don't know what to say."

He turned his back to me and leaned against the sink then turned back around. This time he had a serious look on his face, and I did not like it one bit.

"Thank you for...uh, seeing me that way but I want to make things clear because I may have contributed to the fact that you have this type of feelings for me." He took some steps toward me. "I only see you as another annoying sister. I have never thought of you as a woman that I would be with. Growing up, you were always a friend and a sister, and you continue to be. I cannot return those type of feelings, Lana. It can never happen. Maybe it was our closeness that made your heart lie to you, but I am begging you to forgive me for acting that way and to not hurt you any further, it will end. In all of this, I am saying that I do not feel the same way. Your emotions are probably just a silly crush, and you should not be stupid and ruin our friendship."

Shame, sadness, anger and every emotion that could make someone go crazy was all over me. Not only did he reject me, but he also made fun of my feelings for him. I literally was in love with him. I knew what I felt, and it hurt that he took it as some joke. 

"Listen, I really like Nina. I hate how things have become and if you cared about me, well, as a friend and not a lover, you should just be happy for me. I am not happy that you are telling me that you see me as a lover. Please, don't make things awkward for the both of us. Just... I am sorry, I can't see you as anything but a sibling."

I bit down hard on my lip when he walked past me. Once I heard the door of the kitchen close, I broke down, letting the tears spill. I got down on my knees and covered my face with my hands, then cried hard into it. I cried hard, my chest hurt. I cried hard, my lungs felt like it was hot. I took my hands away from my face and bent over the floor with my hands on it. I could barely see my hands as tears blurred my vision. 

Drake did not like me. For the first time, Drake hurt me after he said he would never. 

I sat up straight and stopped crying then wiped my eyes and cheeks. I rose to my feet and stared at a spot on the wall before me. Paul was right to have told me to confess my feelings but what was the point of making him regret when he was like this? Then again, I could still do it to piss him off. He saw me as friend, right? If Paul was right about Drake being protective of me, then I was ready to hurt him back in any way for doing this to me. He had the right to reject me but not this way, not over some stupid girl.

I was going to make Drake regret ever doing this to me.

I took out my phone and dialed Paul's number. Luckily, he answered immediately.

"Let's do it," I said.