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limerence
limerence
Author: Yarmia

chapter 1: Camellia

Author: Yarmia
last update Last Updated: 2023-01-08 00:14:49

Living in a family of seven siblings has never been easy for anyone. And so does for me. Elder siblings are technically parents to younger siblings who don't have to give birth in order to take care of them and unluckily I'm the oldest.

I have two brothers and four sisters which all act like two year olds despite the youngest is also three year old. I grew in a large family which is more chaotic than being in a club. It's not like I mind them and they all are very dear to me until my brothers annoy me and my sister's sneak into my vanity!

"Mama! Lucy broke my branded lipstick!" I stomped out of the room and showed her the empty container stick which had no colour left in it.

"Dear, I've always told you to take care of your things. They are childish, they don't know. You must keep them somewhere they can't reach" my mother makes my blood boil more with these defensive words on their behalf.

I mean like I earn money by working part time and spent it on my shopping and necessities. If they keep ruining everything at this rate, then my all salary which I earned all this time will be equal to trash I put everyday in the bin.

One thing I'm certain of until now is that there's no use in giving them a good beating because it will only put my mother in a really bad mood and she will kick me out if the house for hurting them. So I packed my vanity into a box and locked it in the cupboard, clearing up the dressing table empty.

Wearing my linen shirt along with scarf and beige pants, I was set to go. I don't usually wear too much makeup but always buy alot. My basic everyday look includes mascara, sunblock and lipstick which makes up for my blush too.

Wearing my sneakers, I grabbed the keys from the top of refrigerator. I wonder why asian parents put everything important up there?

Today was Saturday and everyone had a off but not for me. I am 20 year old grownup gal who's doing bachelors in literally literature in the most prestigious university in my city. Literature might sound odd because it's not common. But it sparked my interest when I started reading too much novels in my teenage. Right after completing my two year intermediate education, I was very much sure about what I want.

And I got it.

Now after I'm in second year, so far I've been able to write two books on my own which I got them published all over the country. Luckily all the copies were sold out within a few months and it brought me a reasonable amount of money.

I'm planning to write a poetry book after completing my ongoing assignment. Life's never been roses and sunshine. But it doesn't mean I'm gonna give up!

I picked a toast from the plate which was placed in front of Lucy and no surprise she started crying with mouth wide open and voice so shrilling that it could pierce your ears.

Just before my mother could turn around, I leapt away quietly before it.

"Who ate her toast?" I could hear her loud voice ranging between the four walls of the dining room.

"Mom! Camellia ate it!" It was Ashely the nosiest. She always likes to be the first one telling names. I don't know what to do with her, she annoys me the most.

I slid the keys inside the car and ignited the engine. Gulping down the last bite of toast down my throat, I took the car out of the garage towards the main door.

I motioned Sam to open the gate as he came running from the lawn.

I am a rough driver, and I wonder who passed me the driving test. Feeling sulky, I turned up the music loud.

My eyes travelled towards the side view mirror, and I saw a guy dressed in black, on bike. According to my knowledge, I've seen him for unnecessarily long behind my car. And he didn't seem to change the direction.

Feeling the fear creeping inside my veins, I had a hunch that he has been following me for much longer than I seem to notice.

To confirm my suspicions, I changed the direction taking a longer route than I usually follow.

Scared to the pit of my stomach, he also took a turn just behind my car.

Finally, I reached the university and parked the car in parking lot. As I got out, I didn't saw him but I knew he was somewhere at a distance watching me. You know the feeling of being watched?

It's always real and especially with girls, they always have this sixth sense which tells us someone is digging holes in our existence.

I looked around but found no one in particular. Grabbing my bag, I walked myself to the building, ignoring my brain for constantly telling that he was just behind my back. I'm actually an overthinker which always bought me trouble but a lot skills such as being a writer and poet. This imagination has led me to escape from reality and create my own fantasy world, in which I love to live.

Taking the elevator to the fourth floor, I greeted my classmates on my way. People say I have a higher IQ level than average people but I don't believe it because if I did I would've probably chosen something more professional other than literature.

I don't mean that literature is unprofessional or I don't like it but my father always wanted me to be a doctor. He had this wish since I was born, burdening me with it. Till the day I took admission wherever I preferred, i was being suffocated beneath their desires.

Waving a hand to Syra, I called her over. Syra is my best friend, we actually met at the orientation day accidentally. As a clumsy girl I am, I broke my heels while skipping the stairs. Luckily she was behind my back and she saw I almost tripped. But Syra has always been thoughtful and she always bought flats whenever she wore heels so that day God saved me and she lent me those flats. I couldn't ever pay for her kindness because her gesture really touched my heart.

Since that day we've been hanging out together, studying together and doing all the nasty things together.

"Man! Did you do your assignment? " She approached and the first question she asked my expressions turned into a foul mood.

"Fuck you Syra! You're asking me such a shitty question at the start of day? I'm so done with you! Now you'll really have to feed me ice cream or else I won't forgive you " I told her with a tight expression and crunched nose.

Playfully she pinched my crunched nose and laughed.

"If you wanted to have ice cream, you should've told me the simple way, why these tantrums?"

I hit her in the back and replied, "because my assignment is still not complete and you shouldn't have reminded me if it"

"Okay let's fuck it together! Tell me something new?" Syra grabbed my arm and motioned me towards the basketball court where all the hot guys were crowded irrespective of the time.

"Have you ever been stalked? Like physically?" My brain knew where this question was coming from but didn't sense that I'd spit it in front of her.

"What? I don't think so. Wait... something happened?" She was always the first to sense everything.

"Nothing serious but I've seen this guy dressed in black and riding a bike. He has been following me around for a few days but today I noticed it. It felt scary" I explained to her despite knowing her answer.

"Let's report to the police!" She exclaimed in urgency.

"What? No police can't be involved and it's not even that serious. I mean he hasn't done anything. He just simply watches me and I think I can deal with it because he is just like other creepy guys" I tried to calm her down because even in my situations her blood pressure always shot up.

Soon after our conversation we both went to our classes. It was a boring craft of writing class and the professor was more than old to explain it in an interesting way.

I took my seat in the corner, facing the window. I guess being physically present in class counts as attendance which was just enough for me because I was not mentally present there.

I constantly thought about that guy who was stalking me. What if he turns out to be dangerous?

What if I'm already in danger?

This mere thought shook me because in a south Asian country like this, rape was common. And rape is worse than death to every victim. That was also the reason which is why I always maintained my distance with male guys. I had a firm belief that I'll let my parents choose my husband, it's never gonna be me.

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  • limerence    chapter 50: Arnold

    It was difficult to stay away from her. I've never gotten used to someone like this before. I always separate work from my personal life but in her case it made it difficult to do so. I had so much work to do but I still couldn't focus on anything. I looked at my phone multiple times during my dealing but there was no call or text message from her. I wondered if she minded my dry reply to her long goodbye. I didn't want to give her anymore hope, that's why I tried to distance myself from her. But it seemed like torturing myself. I remembered when one night we both were lying on the bed after making out for long in Paris. We both were exhausted but not enough to not talk. And just like that we carried out some casual conversation. She tried to pull away from my chest but I didn't let her go and pulled her close to my embrace. She was astounded but it didn't last long when she got comfortable. "Can I ask you a question?" She asked innocently, her eyes shining in the moonlight of the

  • limerence    chapter 49: Camellia

    I woke up to the empty side. He was nowhere in sight. I searched for his bag and it was gone, even his wallet, watch from the dresser. So he just went away like this? Without telling me? I felt a pang of hurt in my heart. I looked for any note but found none. My eyes filled with tears Involuntarily and I wondered why couldn't we live like a normal couple for even once?And the answer was crystal clear, because we were not normal people, this marriage was not normal, nothing was normal about all of this. I wiped my tears and went to the bathroom to wash my face. After I returned, Polly knocked on the door and informed me about the breakfast. I went downstairs and sat on the chair. She bought me butter and toast. I took a bite despite having no appetite. She came again with the milk and I started feeling nauseated with just the sight of it. She placed the glass in front of me and the contents in my stomach started rising. I immediately stood up and ran for the bathroom to empty my oes

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    She helped me pack my bag. I don't know if I really meant what I said to her last night but there was that force inside me which wanted to make it true. She was a wild flower, waiting to be picked up and taken care of. Since we were on good terms, we didn't fight but still it felt weird to stay as friends and push our feelings back when we're actually a couple. It's all because of my insecurities, and I know I am wrong. She took out my clothes from the wardrobe and removed the hangers. Placing them neatly in the suitcase, I couldn't help but gaze at her while trying to find my undergarments. She was unaware and busy in her work. I noticed how her layered hair kept teasing her face and neck, unable to stay at the back. They shaped her face and she looked magnificent. Like some goddess with those shaped lips, and lashes shadowing her cheeks. She tucked her hair back behind her ear and I wondered how it would feel to tangle those hairs in between my fingers and feel their softness. As

  • limerence    chapter 47: Camellia

    After spending two days officially as friends in Paris, we finally returned back. Arnold was more relaxed and calm. Even though he hurt me multiple times, I had no choice of leaving somewhere else. I was stuck with him for a lifetime. I was still really mad at him for concealing his past from me but I couldn't complain. We were not on marital terms to call each other as husband and wife and ask for the rights. Especially not me. As soon as I was home, I was met with an official letter from my university. They asked me to join from next week as my application was approved. I didn't know if I was doing it right by going back to the same educational institution. People there now know my story, they were going to eye me with those weird stares and I couldn't guarantee it would be affected by it. I have no friends now to share that amazing experience, I was all alone on my own now. We were having dinner when he informed me that he'll need to go on a two day trip to Spain for some busine

  • limerence    chapter 46: Camellia

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  • limerence    chapter 45: Arnold

    She was still nowhere in sight and I was tired after meeting so many people. The women's gaze followed me wherever I was standing and the men had nothing to talk about except business and their future plans. However I was a bit thankful too because Camellia was a distraction, I couldn't focus on anything if she was by my side. I excused myself and headed towards the restroom where she disappeared 20 minutes ago. I was in my tracks when a woman appeared in front of me and blocked my way. "Mr Arnold! What a coincidence! I hope you remember me!" The brunette placed a hand on my chest and spoke. It took me a moment to realise that she was one of the fuck buddies I had before I married Camellia. This one was the wife of my competitor whom I fucked multiple times and after I dumped her, she married one of my competitors to poke me. But only if she knew I don't get worked up like that. Most importantly, she threatened me to expose my secrets but she knew better that I was in mafia. Whatev

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