In the presence of a lover, evaluation will no longer be so smooth and cynical. They will give their time freely. As we hesitantly hint to something, they will get eager and excited. They will say 'go on' when we stumble and hesitate. They won't just say 'poor you' and turn away. They will search out relevant details and will definitely piece together an accurate picture that does justice to our inner lives. The fragile parts of ourselves will be in safe hands with them. We will feel immense gratitude towards this person who does something that we had maybe come to suspect would be impossible: know us really well and still like us, still choose us and still want us. By this time, we have escaped from that otherwise dominant, and devastating sense that the only way to get people to like us is to keep most of who we are under wraps.We will start to feel like we really exist. Our identity will be safe, we won't be the only guardians of our story because they too will be. When the worl
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