جميع فصول : الفصل -الفصل 130

“I fucking hate you. I hate what you’re doing to me. You’re doing this to me when you know what I’ve been through. You’re no better than all the worst men I know.”He laughed when I said this. He grinned like I was a silly little child complaining. Like I was a mere plaything. Like I don’t have any right to disturb him. It made my blood boil and my insides squirm. “You tricked me. You made me believe in all your bullshit. Just so you could, what? Do this to me?” “Isn’t it worth it? I do say so myself.” He smiled like he already won this game we were playing. Checkmate, his face said it all. “I beg to disagree,” my voice was barely a whisper. But my rage was slowly cooking. It’s seeping through my drug-infused senses. It’s waking me up.I scrunched my eyes. “You’re going to pay for this.” “Yeah, sure. You’re saying that as if you’re not dying to fuck me right now. Need I remind you how wet you are? You’re about to put me inside you, sweetheart. Don’t worry, I can prolong this. J

“I messed up,” I told Austin. We were in our dining table when I got home from the hospital. Somehow, the guilt and the shame pushed me to bare it all out. “Something needs to change. I NEED to change. I royally fucked up and this whole thing is my mess,” I added. He sat there and I knew he was starting to defend my actions again. “You were drugged. He manipulated you…”I stopped him. “That’s true. But what about all the other decisions I made? I decided to continue with the booze. I chose to take what he was giving me, Austin. Even if I was endangering my job, even if I was getting out of control. I chose those things. You can’t… I can’t pin this all on anybody else but me. I have a part in all this mess. A big part, actually.” He lowered his head. Maybe he’s realizing I have a point. “I trust too easily. Call it naivety or just plain stupidity, but I always choose to see the good in people. Even to my detriment.”He looked up at me. “But that’s what I like about you. You chose t

“Get up,” he said. “Now. Hands on the table.” I scrambled up and stood at attention. Slowly, ever so slowly, he put his knee in between my legs from behind. “Legs apart, Olivia.”I was vibrating with anticipation at this point. Everything felt charged. I held my breath as I felt him touch his front slightly on my back. I felt his breath on me, touching my skin as he inspected me. “Where did he touch you?” his soft voice was menacing. “I… Austin…” I stammered while he stood beside me. I felt his choppy breath skirting my shoulder. The goosebumps on my skin were ever prevalent. I couldn’t move, I was stuck as a statue. I couldn’t even if I wanted to. He left me paralyzed just by his presence. “I asked you a question, Olivia.” “I don’t…” “You don’t remember?” “I would rather not,” I exhaled. “How did it feel?” “What? I, I don’t know…” “You’re trying to forget, I understand. But you need to open up for me. “ He said this as he wedged his knee between mine. “Ugh…” “Did he tou

AustinThere’s a certain change I can feel in the air. Maybe it’s the fact that Olivia and I finally reconciled, or maybe it’s just that I ultimately let my frustrations go… but I feel different. I feel lighter. Even if everything is going to shit around me. I just feel more… at ease. There’s just something in the air. “I got you your favorite burrito,” Olivia gave me that small smile I love before depositing the paper bag beside me and leaving. She’s back to work, still adjusting to the daily grind but everything’s back to normal. It’s a given that we’re still handling the aftermath of the psychiatrist and everything that came along with that but I can say that we’re good to go. Something just clicked the last time I just let out all my feelings. It was more than domination, it was release. Cathartic. Ever since then, we’ve been mending things between us. All the talks. All the action between the sheets. It’s all helping get us to baseline again. Of course, we’re having low mome

It wasn’t until an hour before visiting his mother that I saw the cracks to his carefully crafted exterior. He was perfectly dressed, as usual. Maybe even more, his suit is his armor after all. The three piece he was donning was not helping me keep my cool, though. Sometimes, I still get these reminders that I’m dating the most attractive man I’ve ever met. It was after work and he sighed a heavy sigh when we stepped off the elevator to the parking lot. His mind was faraway, I could just tell. He was troubled, calculating his next moves and more than apprehensive. The tension on his shoulders never left today. I could just feel the waves of nerves exuding from him. “Hey, do we have time for a little break?” I asked. “Yeah, I wanted to get a grip first. Want to eat?” “I mean, yeah. But, can we park somewhere? Just order some take out.” “Sure,” he murmured. Mind slipping somewhere off as we drove away. It wasn’t hard to find an overlooking spot at this point. We ate silently. I de