جميع فصول : الفصل -الفصل 10

I felt his little hand tighten in mine and his feet started to drag, scuffing along the pavement, as the school loomed ahead in the distance, looking too big to even me. To his little eyes, I’m sure it was gigantic and threatening. I stopped and crouched down to his level, those beautiful chocolate brown eyes staring back at me.“Do you think they will like me?” He asked me for the hundredth time in the last few weeks.“I am positive they will love you, little man. What’s not to love? You are smart and funny and the most handsome little guy I have ever seen.”“You have to say that. You’re my sister.”“Listen, have I ever lied to you?”He cocked his little head, thinking hard. I could see the gears turning, him trying his best to come up with a time I had ever wronged him. If I let this continue, we would be here awhile and he would be late because I had always and would always put him first and he knew it. He was just staling.I stood up again, looked down at him and gave his little h

FLASHBACKShe had fixed him a fancy dinner one night when she knew I wasn’t working. She knew would be home to care for Nate and she could flaunt whatever it was she was attempting to accomplish in front of me. She was strolling around the kitchen in stilettos and barely there red lingerie with a matching see through kimono robe, while she cooked, when I had brought Nate back from the park. She had the wine poured and flowing freely already by the sway of her hips, all waiting for when Phil came in from work. I had quickly made Nate a PB&J and had taken him out of there, retreating to his room the moment I saw how she was dressed and what her intentions were.After I had him fast asleep for the night, I ventured out carefully and, not hearing anyone in the living room or kitchen, I had backtracked to make myself some food. I was starving since Wendy’s presence and attire had prevented me having the chance to get anything to eat at all for myself.I had barely set down and had taken on

As much as I would have liked to have stalled or ran away altogether, I knew I couldn’t. I didn’t know exactly how this conversation was going to go but I, at least, owed Phil enough to have it. He had taken me in and let me live with them when he knew he didn’t have to. I could have easily been tossed into the system, ending up in a foster home somewhere halfway across the country but I didn’t. I know part of it was him feeling that he owed me for taking care of Nate when he wasn’t around and another equal part not knowing how to take care of Nate and be a father himself. For the time, it just worked out for all of us. I took care of Nate and the house, worked when I could and either gave him money to help with bills or bought groceries and necessities for the house.Neither of us ever thought to question the arrangement until it was forced upon us. I grew up. I was no longer the scrawny, awkward fourteen year old girl he took guardianship of that tragic night. He saved me and I, in

She tamped out her cigarette before leaning back with a deep sigh. “I see your point, kid. That is tough. But, that was a long time ago and your momma is long gone from this world. That doesn’t seem to bother him too much now, though, does it?”“Men are different. I remember what it was like for them to be together, though. Janet had always struggled as a mom. She wanted to be my friend more than my parent. She liked to party, drink and do drugs. She smoked marijuana and would snort pills but nothing more than that, not at first. I got drug around with her to every party she went to from the moment my granny died when I was eight. It’s any wonder I didn’t end up being abused when I look back on it.”“She was different when she got with Phil.” I continued pouring my heart out, unable to stop now as Barb just sat and listened. “She tamed her ways, something I never thought would happen. She acted like a real mom, for once. They lived together and seemed happy and in love. He worked, she

I took a few calming, deep breaths as I swung the traitorous gate back and snapped the latch into place. As I passed underneath the plantar box edge I had filled with marigolds, I glanced up into the kitchen window and locked eyes with Phil as he watched me walk past. I offered him a small smile that he did not reciprocate. His face remained void of any emotion whatsoever. Maybe he was just as freaked out about this conversation as I was.“Only one way to find out”, I thought to myself as I climbed the three small steps and grabbed the door knob, twisting it and giving the door a gentle push. With one last deep breath, I crossed the threshold and closed it behind me before calmly walking into the kitchen and taking a seat at the retro red formica table with silver metal trim.Phil was still at the window, his back turned to me and I let my gaze trail down his body appreciatively. He was of average height, around six feet tall. His muscles were solid and his figure lean, just visibly de