Semua Bab Fuel Me, Break Me, Love Me: Bab 51 - Bab 55

RejenaI sit at the river, my feet in the water as I watch my dogs run through the water, chasing each other. I have been coming here every morning for the last four days, taking the same route that leads to the same place. The girls left two days ago, wanting to support their men. Tiane was willing to stay behind, but I had told her to go as she is as much a fan of the sport as the rest of us. I wanted her to have fun, not stay behind with me while I contemplated my life.At first, I had wanted to go to the race, but when Thursday came around, I grabbed the leeches instead of my bag waiting in the corner of the guest room. When the girls were calling me non-stop to find out where I was, I was at the river, telling them to go on without me. I just couldn’t make myself go, couldn’t make myself face him, not when I wasn’t truly sure where his heart was. I know what everyone is telling me, know through his action before the terrible night, that he had feelings for me, but I can’t imagine

RejenaI wanted to stay, wanted to wrap my arms around him and tell him how proud of him I am, but I fled, like a coward. The second he crossed the finish line, I was heading for Mila’s car. I sat there for a good hour, contemplating if I should go back inside or if I should head straight to my dogs and hold them instead.I end up driving to the hotel and spend another hour pacing up and down in my room, wondering if I should try to get some sleep, go to the party, or just get back in the car and drive. It is nearly eight in the evening when my door bursts open and I stop pacing, facing him. Dalon is breathing hard in the doorway, looking like he was ready to go hunt me down and at the same time surprised to see me standing in my hotel room, probably looking like a mess. I can’t even count how many times I had run my hands through my hair or pulled at it. The concealer has been washed off, leaving the dark rings exposed.“You’re still here.” He says, stunned. He takes a step into the

RejenaI have left everything to be here. Not just for him, but for myself as well, and this dinner with his parents will be the biggest test of all. If his parents don’t approve of me, we will be over. It is not just the fact that his parents have strict rules, but also the fact that they have funded his entire career. Racing is his life and without their support, it will be a big knock on his team’s funding as well as his support system and with the sport that he is in and the amount of pressure he has, the support is paramount to his success. Add in the fact that it will be an even bigger media scandal if his parents that have been at nearly every race, always there to shout from the sidelines, suddenly step back and withdraw their funding. I will be blamed for his career going down the drain and it will put strain on our relationship. Not that there is any relationship just yet, but I know it is only a matter of time before I let all my walls down and let him in again. The make ou