Semua Bab I Am Mustafin: Bab 41 - Bab 50

I eye myself in the mirror, my gaze lingering on the loose curls of my hair before shifting to my blue irises.I feel different. Not the same different that I felt after he took me, but I almost feel as though I’m... more. I’m not just the half-blood Alaki that was taken ownership of by him. I’m...I don’t know...Yet, somehow, it’s all the same.I was never prepared to marry, let alone marry Efrem Mustafin. However, the moment we walked out of that courthouse, a million thoughts raced through my mind, specifically: things will be different.They aren’t.It’s been a week since, and he hasn’t said a word to me. In fact, I haven’t seen him since, save for watching him go into his office this morning.I want nothing more than to barge in and demand answers, regardless of how he may feel about it. I want to know... am I really his wife? Or is this just another way of him ensuring my safety? Why did he go through the trouble if I’ve been perfectly safe thus far?I’m done waiting for him to

They say the mind is a powerful tool. With the right mindset, you can overcome almost anything. If only it were as easy to put into practice as it is to understand in theory. My greatest psychological feat? Being able to lose myself in thought during a walk, ignoring the freezing temperatures of what might be the coldest winter I’ve ever known.As I stroll through the surprisingly beautiful garden at the estate’s edge, the cold nipping at my nose fades into the background. Tavin walks closely behind me as I hug myself, my gaze fixed on my white boots traversing the intricate pathway. Snuggling deeper into my jacket and beanie, I catch myself, once again, comparing my old life to the weight of my new one.It’s been almost two weeks since I married the Mustafin Ringleader... Everyone probably knows by now.Despite my mixed feelings, I know I made the right choice—the best choice I could have. Yet I’m ashamed, knowing this reflects poorly on him. I didn’t choose to be born this way or to

Regret is a terrible thing.I used to believe I’d never do something so awful that I’d spend the rest of my life regretting it. But that’s not true. As much as I wish it were, it never will be.My single greatest regret is having gone for that walk.You don’t realize how good it feels to not be in pain until pain is all you feel. Yet despite the anesthetics numbing my back and the heavy burn on my chest, it’s not enough.I don’t want to feel anything at all.After Doctor Selik pumped me full of drugs, I’m grateful that all I can feel are the heavy bandages wrapped around me like a second skin. They cover my chest, encase my breasts and rib cage, all the way down to my waist—as though they’re holding me together as I lay on my side in Efrem’s bed.I stopped counting the hours the moment I was kidnapped, and I’ve kept my eyes closed despite being awake for what feels like days.I don’t want to talk to anyone. I don’t want to see anyone. I keep hoping that if I hold my eyes closed long e

My gaze flickers up, briefly meeting Efrem’s eyes as he stands a few feet away. His arms are crossed, his features softening as he watches me hold my undone bra against my chest.“She’s healing perfectly,” Doctor Selik says, his voice steady and reassuring as he removes the last of the stitches from my back.It’s a relief. I don’t know how much longer I can take being treated like an invalid.I inhale sharply as Doctor Selik applies a cool gel-like substance over my healing scars, my skin erupting in goosebumps.A warning would’ve been nice.“All done!” he says enthusiastically. “Let’s take a look at that burn now.”I turn my head slowly, giving clear access to the exposed scar on my chest as he moves in front of me. I avoid eye contact, distracting myself by looking at the removed sutures on the coffee table.He clicks his tongue and brings his hand to my chest. I can barely feel his touch as he applies the same gel with a wooden applicator.Why can’t I feel it?“Everything looks goo

Terror grips me, its icy fingers wrapped around my heart. Each ragged breath I take sends waves of pain through my back, matching the frantic rhythm of my heart. The familiar ache in my shoulders and the cold bite of shackles on my wrists remind me of my helplessness.“No!” The scream tears from my throat, raw and desperate, as my eyes lock onto Roman.He stands mere feet away, a blowtorch in hand and a cruel smirk twisting his features. The heat from the flame grows more intense as he approaches, and suddenly, agony explodes across my chest. I cry out, my body convulsing as the pain spreads like wildfire.“Alaki.”The voice is distant, barely audible over my own screams as I writhe in a pool of sweat.“Alaki!”A gentle hand grasps my arm, shaking me. My eyes snap open, vision blurry with tears and remnants of the nightmare. The dim light of the room assaults my senses, making me squint as I bolt upright.My heart pounds so hard I can feel it in my throat. Each breath is a struggle, m