บททั้งหมดของ Love or Lust: บทที่ 101 - บทที่ 110

Wesley POV Her fist slammed into my chest, in an attempt to punch me, but I felt nothing, i was more worried about her hurting her hand. “You prick! How could you?! She hit me again, and again. Each one landed somewhere over my heart, and I let her. I didn't move, i didn't block her. I just stood there in the falling snow and took it, because I deserved every single one and a thousand more."Three weeks!" Her voice cracked and broke as tears streamed down her face. “Three weeks, Wesley! I fucking thought something happened to you. I called you so many times-“"I’m sorry Bow." My voice came out wrecked. "I’m so sorry.”"Then why didn't you-“ She hit me again, harder, and her hand stayed there, pressed flat against my chest, right over the place where my heart was trying to beat me its way out. “Why didn't you come back?"I couldn't answer. I couldn't do anything except stand there and cry- ugly, silent tears freezing on my jaw in the cold. She looked at me, the way she alw

Bowie POV I woke up to the sun just rising and the weight of him.The fire had burned down to ash sometime in the night and the cold increased, but Wesley's arm was banded across my waist and his face buried in my hair.The afghan my grandmother crocheted was tangled around our legs, barely covering our bodies.I turned to Wesley, laying still and counting his exhales the way I used to count them at his apartment, in the dark, before everything. I still couldn’t believe he was really here, after everything.I was so mad at him for ghosting me for three weeks, i didn’t even know the hell he was going through.Then the thought of him driving five hours through a snowstorm softened my heart even more. The sound of a toilet flushing jolted me from my thoughts, i went rigid. “Wesley." I shoved at his chest. "Wesley, wake up. My mom is up. We are on her living room floor. You are shirtless."He let out a sleepy grunt and rolled toward me, instead of away from me."Wesley." I w

Bowie POV The drive took five hours and it was the best five hours we had in months.He talked about his mother. I had never heard him talk about her at length like this, and this time was different. He told me light hearted things about her as we drove on the highway, with the snow giving way to a gray sky. He told me about her laugh, about the way she would shown up to every game with a thermos of hot chocolate, even the ones he lost. I took a mental note to do that.Then he told me about how much she loved Christmas and how she would decorate the whole house just like my mom.“The Christmas after she died, my father didn’t put up any tree, no ornaments like she did, we just ate cold dinner in silence. Since then I haven’t experienced a true Christmas until you dropped a tinsel over my head.” He explained and paused to flash a grateful smile at me.I watched his profile as he talked, and I fell in love with him all over again, not like it was in the beginning, but somethin

Wesley POV The clock on the dash glowed 6:41am when I cut the engine.The weather was around a twenty -two degree, the windshield still frosted at the corners where the defroster hadn't reached.I looked ahead, to the field house and the bright white light that shone across the empty lot like it had been sitting there all night waiting for me. My cleats were in the trunk under a duffel I hadn't opened since November. The bag still had a practice jersey in it, number seven, and the shoulder pads i had cleaned out of my locker the morning i quit and never had the guts to throw away.Bowie sat in the passenger seat with her coat zipped to her chin and her hands tucked between her knees. She hadn't said anything for the last twenty minutes of the drive, but at a red light she put her hand on the back of my neck and left it there, her thumb moving slow over the base of my skull, and i had driven the rest of the way with my jaw locked, so tight my teeth ached."You didn’t have to c

Bowie POV "I want to go in alone," he said, staring at the window. "No.""Bowie-“ I slid off the counter.“You went in alone last time. You sat in that office by yourself, you signed what he put in front of you, and then you drove home and decided to shape of the rest of my life without me in it. That's how we got here." I pulled my sweater off the back of the chair. “So no. Not this time. I'm coming in, and I'm going to say things to him, and you are going to let me."He looked at me for a long moment with his jaw working, the way he did when he was deciding whether to argue. Then he nodded once and went to start the car.> The drive took about an hour and forty minutes. Wesley kept both hands on the wheel and i turned the radio off. I watched his hands more than i watched the road. His knuckles had gone pale on the wheel around the second hour and stayed that way. Every few miles he would flex his fingers, stretch them out, put them back. I put my hand on his t