Obsessive Regret Short Stories & Novels

When my wife, Rebecca Walsh, misses my chemotherapy session for the 99th time, I come across a post on social media. "I won my lover's heart with a kidney. She will surely love me to death, right?" The attached photo shows a couple kissing on a street in Targon. The woman has a small heart-shaped scar on her neck. What a coincidence—it is exactly the same as Rebecca's. The woman who nearly dies for me falls in love with someone else so easily. The comments below are full of encouragement from strangers. "Man, you're so brave. Wishing you everlasting love." "If I were the woman, I would love you to death." I leave a comment too. "I hope you are together until you are in the depths of hell, you cheating pair. As for me, the husband, I will step aside to make way for you." One minute later, the post disappears. It doesn't matter. I post on my own account. I write, "After I spent three years battling cancer, my wife fell in love with the man who's supposed to be the kidney donor." The attached images are our marriage certificate and the same photo of them kissing from earlier.

I’m the Chief Counsel for Donatello Vexille, the Godfather of the Vexille family. I’m also his secret wife. At night, he’d pull me close, take me with a ragged violence, leaving his marks on me, a brutal claim I couldn’t refuse. But by day, I was just his lawyer. All he had for me were cold commands. We lived like that for three years. I decided I was done. But he couldn’t know. When I handed him the divorce papers, disguised as a bill of lading, and he signed his name, a breath I didn’t know I was holding finally escaped me. I chased him for seven years and was married to him for three. Whatever was left of my heart finally flatlined. I knew I could never have his. Because it already belonged to someone else: Angelina, his underboss’s sister. He remembered her favorite restaurant. He got blind drunk with joy when she filed for divorce. He even posted his personal guards outside her door. Those were honors I never had. So I tricked him into signing the papers, packed my things, and vanished. What I didn't expect was what he did after I left. He put a king's ransom on my location, and even announced to the whole world that I was his wife.

I used to be a top ballet dancer. The year I was diagnosed with a spinal hemangioma, my boyfriend Julian Blackwood said, "Wherever you go, I go." We'd been together three years. He walked beside me as I went, step by step, from the most luminous dancer on that stage to a woman in a wheelchair. Every time the nerve pain hit and I collapsed, he was the one who lifted me off the floor. Every round of electrostim and acupuncture, he sat in the corridor outside the therapy room and waited for me to come out. Before I got sick, he promised me—the night I finished my final performance of Swan Lake, we'd sign the marriage license. He'd bought tickets for that show three months in advance. I never stood on that stage again. And the marriage license never came up. Until the morning I noticed the collar of his white dress shirt carried a smudge of lipstick that wasn't mine. I heard him on the balcony. A woman's voice on the other end. "Mr. Blackwood, you left your jacket at the hotel last night. I'll bring it over." I stared at that smear of red, and something in me snapped. I laughed. "Send me to Westbrook. The locked-down rehab facility. I don't want to drag you down anymore." Something flickered in his eyes—a brief, animal panic. Then he nodded. He thought I meant rest. He didn't know I'd already signed the papers to donate my body to science. I was going there to die.

The day Lorenzo got kidnapped by a rival family, I found out I was three months pregnant. I took the million dollars his father offered, and I ran. The next time we met, I looked him in the eye and told him I'd been a mole for the rival family the whole time. He was chained up in a cellar, staring at me through the iron bars utterly despairing. He said he'd kill me himself, and then grind my bones to dust. Seven years later, when I saw him again, there was a beautiful woman on his arm. They were getting married. And I was so far down I had to beg him for a loan. He pulled out a thick stack of bills. Lit it on fire right in front of me. He said he'd rather burn it than give it to some whore feeding another man. He didn't know I was begging because my son was dying. His son too.

My fiancé slapped me across the face in front of the entire academy. He did it to save face for another girl. That same day, I deleted every way he could reach me and announced that our engagement was over. No one believed me. Orion Draven and I grew up together. From the age of six to eighteen, I followed him like a shadow for twelve whole years. Everyone knew I loved him. Everyone knew I would forgive him. Even Orion thought so. On the day I left Ironhold Academy, he stopped me at the gate. For the first time, there was panic in his voice. “Why? Just because I hit you?” I looked him straight in the eye and said each word clearly. “Yes. Because you hit me.”

My father, Henry Carlton, is a genius painter. My mother, Candace Mills, is a world-class dancer. Dad says Mom is his muse. To marry her, he gives up a family fortune worth hundreds of millions. Everyone is moved to tears by their beautiful love story. But on the day I am born, Mom is left paralyzed from childbirth and can never dance again. While taking care of me as I cry day and night, Dad does everything he can to help Mom recover. One day, he disappears. All he leaves behind is one letter accusing Mom and me of destroying his inspiration. He says we are the ones to blame. My helpless Mom holds me in her arms as I do nothing but cry. She becomes convinced that if I can become Dad's new muse, he will come back. So, she pushes herself through grueling rehabilitation and devotes everything she has to training me. When I win the silver medal at a national dance championship, Mom finally sees Dad again. Dressed in an impeccable suit, he carries himself with the confidence and air of a wealthy man. He has one arm wrapped around one of the competition judges, and the two of them are openly affectionate with each other. Unable to take the sight of him with another woman, Mom runs out. While chasing after her, I tumble down a flight of stairs. When I finally limp back home, Mom is waiting for me. She grips a stick tightly with a dark look in her eyes. "If you can't become a muse, then what good are you?"

Mom is always very strict with both my elder sisters, Esther and Emily Kingston. She always wakes them up at 5:00 am to make them study. And if they refuse to wake up, Mom will grab an embroidery needle and stab it into my arm. When fresh blood spills out, Esther and Emily will both get a fright and scramble to their desks at once to begin studying. Sometime during the year-end exam, Esther gets one easy question wrong, and I receive ten lashes with Mom's belt. Emily gets only the second-highest score in class, and I am forced to kneel on glass until my knees turn bloodied and torn. Esther and Emily feel sorry for me and fall to their knees, begging Mom to have mercy on me and promising that they will study hard and make her proud of them. Mom smiles happily and says that this teaching method works very well. However, after the SATs, Esther applies for a college out of state, and Emily tells Mom that she is eloping with a young man whom she has fallen in love with. Mom is so angry that she yanks me over and stuffs me into a huge fish tank before beginning to fill it up with water. She then takes a video of me, threatening to drown me alive if they don't listen to her and do exactly as she says. The water keeps rising in the tank. I feel scared, but I don't struggle because Mom always tells me that the only reason for my existence is to be made an example out of for Esther and Emily. She often quotes Shakespeare's "Othello", telling me about how I am the "sacrificial" dog one beats to scare a lion and teach it obedience. I think that I am considered quite a qualified dog after all, right?

Mom always says that depression is nothing more than an illness born of idleness. People who are truly busy studying don't have time to be depressed. So, during my senior year of high school, I lie awake through countless nights, my hair falling out in clumps as I tremble over endless mock papers. Mom only slides another mock exam booklet in front of me. "Finish this booklet, and you won't have time to wallow in self-pity." At family gatherings, my relatives notice that I keep my head down and barely speak. They ask Mom, "Why has she gotten so quiet?" Mom's face darkens at once. "It's because she's guilty about something, duh. Go on. Tell everyone what you've done wrong this time." Later, even my homeroom teacher calls to say I don't seem like myself anymore. The moment Mom hangs up, she rounds on me. "So, now, you've started tattling to your teacher?" It isn't until I collapse before a mock exam that she finally listens to the doctor's advice and brings home a tiny orange tabby. Through the darkest days of my life, that cat becomes my only reason to keep going. Eventually, I make it into college. When I come home for the Independence Day holiday, I step through the door and call out instinctively for him. "Tangy?" No answering meow. Even the cat bed on the balcony is gone. "Stop calling," Mom said flatly. "I dumped him back where I found him the day you left." I stand there, frozen for several seconds before turning and darting outside, only to realize I have no idea where to go. The sounds around me become muffled, as though separated by a pane of glass, drifting farther and farther away. At that moment, my last connection to the world quietly snaps.

When Vivienne Carter married Sebastian Cross at twenty-two, everyone said how lucky she was. He was ten years older, a mafia Don with terrifying power in his hands, and yet for three years he doted on her alone. He indulged her in everything, kept her sheltered under his wing, tender and attentive down to the smallest detail. Only in the dead of night did he turn possessive and overpowering, taking without limit, never once relenting even when she begged him through tears. She had always been certain she was the one thing he loved. Then her father died without warning. Drowning in grief, she called him ninety-nine times, and every call was cut off. In an instant, a single photo shattered every illusion she had. On a Paris street softened by dusk, the man she'd loved for three years was bending to hold another woman. That woman, gentle-featured and faintly resembling her, was her cousin.

When I start middle school, Dad quits his job to become my full-time study coach. He devotes every ounce of energy to monitoring my academics and refuses to let a single distraction near me. My best friend in middle school has average grades, so Dad goes straight to his parents for a talk. "My son is going to a top school. Don't let your kid's low IQ rub off on him." I lose my closest friend after that, and the rest of my classmates start keeping their distance too. In high school, the class rep asks me a math question one day, and Dad sees it happen. Without a word, he slaps her across the face. "Already flirting with boys at your age? I'll have the principal expel you! "Just asking a question? My son's study time is precious. If you're too stupid to figure it out, hire a tutor!" After that, I have no social life left at all. I finally get into a top university out of state. Dad even agrees to let me live in the dorms. I think this is my chance to break free. But on move-in day, he shows up at the campus gate, suitcases in hand. "Let's go, Tyler! I thought it over and decided to move here with you!"

My sister, Delilah Sorrell, and I are now in our third year of captivity after being trafficked into Northern Marovia. Her whereabouts are unknown—whether she is dead or alive, no one knows—while I am tortured until I am nothing but a living corpse. The rotting flesh on my body constantly gives off a stench, the old iron chains on my feet cut deep into my skin, and I even compete with pigs for food just to fill my stomach. I finally quit resisting after countless cries for help went unanswered. I become completely consumed by despair, with only one thought left in my mind—to die. Suddenly, I hear a fierce argument happening nearby, just as I swallow a handful of pills and wait for my life to fade away. "Bennett is your younger brother! You already ruined his bright future after the SAT just for the sake of an underprivileged student! Why are you still putting him through this torture?" Delilah, my missing sister, suddenly shows up, speaking in a rushed, irritated tone. "He knows perfectly well that I am always here to back him up and that his grades don't matter. He still deliberately went out of his way to beat Nathan's scores, triggering a relapse of Nathan's depression! "I'm merely punishing him to teach him some humility. I'll be bringing him home once Nathan graduates in a month, so this minor hardship means nothing." I finally realize the truth now. I have risked my life searching every inch of the compound and still can't find her. It turns out that from the very beginning, all of this is just her punishing me for the sake of Nathan Baker, that underprivileged student. I cough up a mouthful of blood as I laugh through my tears. "Your punishment for me is finally coming to an absolute end, Delilah. I won't be returning home with you ever again."

My mother loved obedience tests. I told her I couldn't eat ginger, and she put it in every single meal. "Who's allergic to ginger? You're just being picky." For my eighteenth birthday she went out and bought half a ton of it, then made an all-ginger banquet and a bottle of homemade ginger perfume. She looked at me, pleased with herself. "Ginger cures everything. I'm doing this for your own good." "Only a spoiled kid refuses ginger. I minced it all up this time. Let's see you pick it out now." My mother was delighted. As far as she was concerned, the test had worked. What she didn't know was that I'd never lied to her. My ginger allergy was severe. Once I'd eaten or breathed in that much of it, the symptoms would build over the next two hours, and they could kill me.

My mother kept calling me while I was on a stakeout. I had been hiding inside a van, watching the suspects for six hours. Then my phone screen suddenly lit up. The ringtone shattered the silence. I panicked and tried to put it on silent, but I accidentally hit the speaker button. A faint sound came from the phone. I felt terribly guilty and embarrassed. If we alerted the suspect, our entire operation tonight would be ruined. Captain Derek glanced over and saw that it was my mother calling. He lowered his voice and said, "Don't panic. Go take the call. Ethan and I will keep watch." Ethan frowned and quietly warned me, "Be careful. Don't give away our position." I gave them a grateful look before quietly getting out of the van and hiding in a nearby corner. I lowered my voice and asked with a hint of irritation, "Mom, I already told you I had an important operation today. Why are you calling me?"

To prove she was fair, Valerie forced me into the family's live-fire drill. She knew I had a severe heart condition. She knew I couldn't stand the sight of blood. Three hours under the blistering sun. My hands shook wildly. I stared at the trembling rabbit tied to the target, terrified to pull the trigger. "You can't even kill a freaking rabbit? How are you supposed to lead this family?" Valerie's icy voice lashed at me from behind. Tears filled my eyes. I finally pulled the trigger. The bullet tore through the rabbit. Blood spattered everywhere. The smell and all that red triggered my blood phobia instantly. Everything went pitch black. Chloe, the intern medic, walked over and grabbed me roughly. Her eyes were full of pure malice. "Underboss, her vitals are totally fine. Is she faking it just to escape training?" Valerie looked down at my pale face. Disgust and disappointment covered her face. "Gemma, is this how I raised you? Everyone else finished. You don't get special treatment." "You finish this drill today—even if it kills you!" Then, my chest stopped moving. Dead silence. My soul floated into the air. I looked down at Mom, filled with guilt and despair. I'm sorry, Mom. This time, I really couldn't hold on.

Three years into our long-distance relationship, my daily conversations with Evan Crawford turned into a three-person group chat. He said the company was busy preparing for its IPO and that he didn't have time to check his phone. If I needed anything, I should tell his "buddy," Nicole Pearce, and she'd pass it along. From then on, everything came through Nicole: what time he left the office, when he traveled for work, what he took for his stomach pain. She knew every moment of his day. Every message I sent him just sat there on "unread." On my birthday, I asked in the group chat if he could spare ten minutes for a video call. Nicole replied, "The launch event is right around the corner. Don't distract him." And yet somehow he had time to like her latest Instagram post. The night the company went public, I took an overnight bus to the celebration dinner and arrived in time to hear him raise a toast. "I owe these past six months to Nicole. She took care of all the little things for me." When he spotted me, he frowned. "Why didn't you check in through the group chat first?" Nicole took the gift from my hands. "He's exhausted. Whatever you need to say, I'll pass it along." A wave of helplessness hit me. I pulled my hand back and left the group chat. If even missing him had to go through her, I had no reason to report my life to him anymore.

My mating ceremony with Chris kept getting interrupted, one reason after another. The first time, his adopted sister Lucy threw him a bachelor party. He drank too much and missed our slot. The second time, right before we set out, Lucy twisted her ankle. Chris took her to the hospital and missed it again. The third time, we were already standing at the vow platform when Lucy cried until she fainted below. Once again, Chris left me standing there. The fourth time, the fifth time... Lucy, every single time. "Hurry up, Sheila! This is the eighth time! There are only fifteen minutes left to receive the Moon Goddess's blessing. If you miss it again, the Moon Goddess will take it as proof the two of you were never meant to be mates!" My best friend Vivian shouted frantically. I took Chris's hand, and I had just started up the steps when Lucy's cry rang out behind us. "Chris, wait, my moonstone bracelet just snapped. It was your coming-of-age gift to me." Chris jerked his foot back mid-step. "Don't rush. I'll wait for you." The buzzing crowd went dead silent. Everyone exchanged looks. I looked at Chris, swallowing my anger. "Chris, there are only fifteen minutes left for the Moon Goddess's blessing." Chris glanced at Lucy, his tone indulgent. "We're already at the door. A few more minutes won't hurt." Watching Chris crouch down beside Lucy to gather her moonstone beads, I suddenly smiled. Then I opened my phone and pulled up a number I'd blocked three years ago. [Didn't you tell me three years ago to give you a chance?] [You have fifteen minutes. Come to Grayfang Pack's Moon Goddess Altar.]

I am the Moon Goddess Cynthia's spirit rabbit. My mistress is the most beautiful woman on Olympus. Yet for a mortal named Arthur, she lowered her divine rank and spent eight hundred years by his side in the mortal realm. The priests sneered at Arthur. "He only grows his divinity when the goddess cracks the whip. What a pathetic, henpecked fool." Arthur always smiled gently. "As long as I can stay by Cynthia's side, nothing else matters." Yet the moment he finally ascended to true godhood, he defied my mistress and brought a delicate mortal woman back from the Misty Forest. Her name was Helen. He shielded the woman behind him. "Cynthia, Helen and I have forged a soul-binding contract. No matter how you punish me, she must stay." I bared my fangs, certain Cynthia would put him in his place, the way she always had during his training. But this time, she didn't. She simply sat beneath the laurel tree Arthur had planted, stroked my ears, and spoke without emotion. "That's fine. It's too quiet here anyway. A bit of company wouldn't hurt." Arthur did not know that Cynthia had once made a wager with Zeus: if she failed to win a mortal's true love, she would have to return to the divine realm and submit to his arrangements. Cynthia had lost. The divine summons would arrive in forty-nine days. Years later, every trace of moonlight vanished from the mortal realm. The mighty new god Arthur then searched for the Moon Goddess for ten thousand years, driven mad with regret.

Caine Black and I were in love for seven years. From our first meeting at the Imperial Academy to being officially recognized by both packs as promised mates, I thought we would be together forever. That certainty lasted until the day before our marking ceremony, when I canceled it. The priest stared at me in shock. "Eileen, the marking ceremony is in twelve hours. Are you sure you don't want to wait for Caine to come back?" I gently unclasped the pendant from my neck, the one that symbolized the Luna's status, and shook my head. "No. "He's under the northern lights on the Ice Plains right now, completing a marking ceremony with his first love."

Five years into our secret marriage, Alex finally agreed to give me a wedding. But the day before the ceremony, I was the one who called it off. The Castellano Family butler asked me, stunned, "Ma'am, the ceremony is tomorrow. Are you sure you don't want to wait for Mr. Castellano to come home?" I picked up my packed suitcase. My voice came out light, almost relieved. "He isn't coming. Right now he's in a church in New York, saying his vows with his adopted sister."

My wedding to Dante Moretti, the Don of the Chicago Mafia, was only days away. When I got home from my final dress fitting, I found he had made the house over into something painfully romantic. Flowers, candles, stacks of gift boxes... Excited as I was, I could not help wondering why. Today was not a special day. He pulled me into his arms and fed me a mouthful of wine from his own lips, his eyes smiling. "I knew you'd forget the anniversary of the day we got together." My stomach dropped. The anniversary was not today. While he was in the shower, his phone went off. A calendar alert popped up on the screen. "Today is your relationship anniversary." I frowned, opened the calendar, and scrolled back through a few pages. Every date he had marked, I realized, traced back to Camille Ricci, his first love. Her period, her birthday, her lucky days... Twelve months, hundreds of entries, packed so tight there was barely any space left between them. I gripped the phone, and the cold went all the way through me. Dante came out with a towel around his waist, saw me still standing there, and teased me with a grin. "Why are you just standing there? Want me to carry you to bed?" I did not call him on it. I said I needed to go over the wedding schedule, and I left. That night I returned the dress, canceled the wedding, and accepted the offer from the university in New York.