xixi
My husband Marcus Ashford has severe social anxiety.
In three years of marriage, he refused to meet a single one of my friends or family.
Even our wedding was just the two of us, because he said a crowd would trigger a panic attack.
Because it hurt me to see him like that, I put up with my parents' disappointment and my friends' confusion, made every excuse for him, and guarded his fragile little world with both hands.
That changed tonight, when I stumbled onto the social media page of his first love, newly returned from overseas.
In the photos, Marcus moved through the room with Chloe, working the toasts with total ease, laughing wide and unguarded.
I opened the next live photo, and a snatch of conversation came out of it.
"Marcus, isn't today your father-in-law's birthday too? You're not going to swing by?"
Marcus answered as though it were nothing, "Going would just be pointless socializing. A waste of time. I'd rather stay here with Chloe."
I went through those few photos over and over, more times than I could count, until my eyes were dry and stinging, and then I shut off the screen without a word.
Then I called a lawyer and had the divorce papers drawn up.
So his world was full of voices and noise after all. It simply refused to open for me, and for me alone.
Fine. If the party wasn't mine, I wasn't going to keep forcing my way in.