Comical Weapon Patreon Novels & Stories

The mafia king won't kill his nineteen-year-old son Leo when he finds out he’s weak and likes males. Instead, he sends him to hell. The Forge, a secretive prison camp hidden within the forest, is where affluent families send their "weak" sons, hoping to mold them into strong men. Leo was stripped of his clothing, shaved, and assigned the number 402; he was dug into freezing mud, subjected to beatings, and then left in complete darkness. Viktor, the strong, hardened guard, has been observing Leo with a wary gaze for years, acting as his personal handler. Viktor is meant to kill him. Instead, as the cameras stop rolling, Viktor lowers the whip, pushes Leo against the wall, and kisses him like a man who has been waiting too long. He moans into Leo's mouth, "I'm paid to break you, but I'd rather keep you." Every harsh day in the pit and every covert touch at night drives them deeper into the fire of forbidden love. But Leo's own father told Viktor to kill Leo and submit proof if he doesn't turn hard in thirty days. A jealous ex wants Leo to die. A shattered youngster from Leo's past is hiding a terrible rebellion. And the man Leo is falling for is the same one who was told to kill him. In a city made to break hearts, one wrong kiss may save them or set everything on fire. The Forge is a raw MM mafia romance that is dark, twisted, and dangerously addicting. Love is the most violent weapon of all.

He stole the wrong girl. Or maybe… she chose the right king. Dante Valenti rules his empire with cold precision and a reputation soaked in blood. No one crosses him. No one deceives him. And no one escapes him. So when he kidnaps a woman from the Moretti estate—a trembling little princess meant to be leverage—he expects fear. Instead, the woman chained in his basement looks him dead in the eyes… and smiles. Aria Moretti has spent years hiding behind silk dresses and a porcelain mask, pretending to be the quiet, obedient daughter of the Moretti crime family. But beneath the pretty facade lies a secret no one suspects: She is the Moretti’s most lethal weapon. A phantom. A blade disguised as a flower. And she walked willingly into the lion’s den for one reason— to kill Dante Valenti. Her mission is simple: Get captured. Get close. Get his trust. End the king. But nothing about Dante is simple. The moment he discovers who she truly is, he doesn’t kill her. He claims her. "You came to kill me, little killer... but every king needs a queen.” Now, Aria is caught in a deadly dance between loyalty and desire, betrayal and obsession. Dante matches her darkness note for note—twisted, brilliant, and devastatingly irresistible. He should be her target. Instead, he’s becoming her temptation. And the deeper she falls, the clearer the truth becomes: She isn’t the only weapon in this war. Dante has claws of his own— and he’s willing to use every one of them to keep her.

"In the world of shadows, loyalty is bought, love is a weapon, and once the mafia claims you, you're ruined—body, soul, and everything you once believed in." Enzo Mezzesalma was cold, aggressive, ruthless, and grim. He had no weakness until he met her and once he got a taste of her, she became his new addiction, now he couldn't let go and she became his only weakness and now, they all wanted her just so they could ruin that perfect facade he had built over the years but only if they knew he was worst than the monster they had never heard of, he was just too good at hiding it. There had to be a reason for Rule Number 3, right? *~* It was summer and Anastasia thought the rest of her days would be sunny but she was dead as she stepped into her home for the first in two years after moving to the university campus to be exchanged for her parent's debts and just like that, Anastasia was thrown into the Mafia world, working as a maid to pay off her parents debts and then she met Enzo Mezzesalma and rule number 3 said: Stay Away From Enzo Mezzesalma. Anastasia didn't know when she started breaking that rule and got herself buried in a hole she wouldn't be able to pull herself out. "My own death does not frighten me, but yours? Oh, that's my greatest and deepest fear," - Enzo Mezzesalma "Being his slut and being a slut are two entirely different things," - Anastasia Martin

He thinks I'm his problem. He doesn't know I'm his destiny. The night I ran, I was nothing but a broken girl fleeing a fate worse than death. My family, the Crystal Lake Betas, deemed me a wolfless defect and planned to use me for breeding stock. But on my escape, a moment of reckless desperation led me into the arms of Alpha Luciano Westwood, the most formidable male in the territories... and he rejected our undeniable mate bond, leaving me shattered and on the run. Months later, I’ve found fragile peace, living secretly among humans, but the Alpha who broke my heart can't forget my scent. Luciano, haunted by regret and a primal obsession, tracks me down, suspecting I'm a pawn in a pack war. He is determined to force me into his protection, initiating a dangerous game of forced proximity where every shared breath sharpens the tension between us. As the Alpha struggles to reconcile his suspicions with the raging desire of the mate bond, I discover the truth: those crystals weren't suppressing a defect - they were holding back a Prime Wolf, an ancient, elemental power ready to be unleashed. Now, the one male who once scorned me is the only one strong enough to stand by my side. Luciano rejected the weak girl. Can he command the weapon I've become? "I’ll just have the usual, Alanza. I’m not running from trouble this time."

She was sent to steal, not to fall in love. Mia—a woman trapped in the shackles of her father’s debts—was a pawn in a dangerous game. Forced to work for a criminal gang, her orders were clear: disguise as a stripper, seduce her target, and steal a critical drive. It was supposed to be simple. But nothing about that night went according to plan. Because Zac was there. A billionaire with power, charm, and eyes that saw straight through her. He booked her for the night, and in a single heartbeat, everything changed. Mia missed her target, and in a twist of fate, two strangers fell into a love neither of them saw coming. But love is a weakness. When her boss demands her loyalty, Mia has no choice but to vanish—leaving Zac broken and Mia a ghost. Months later, she’s back. A new name. A new role. A new mission. This time, Mia’s orders are clear: spy on him. Hired as his cook, she steps back into Zac’s world… only to discover he’s now engaged to someone else. The man who once promised her forever is out of reach. And the secrets Mia carries are more dangerous than ever. But some connections can’t be erased. As lies unravel and betrayal ignites, Mia is faced with a choice: protect the man who still owns her heart or survive the forces that will stop at nothing to destroy them both. In a game of lies and love, the heart is the deadliest weapon of all. Prepare to be captivated by THE BILLIONAIRE’S MYSTIQUE BRIDE—A suspenseful romance story, you won’t be able to put down.

After discovering that a large tumor had invaded her uterus—and that her already slim chance of becoming pregnant had been deliberately destroyed by the cruel conspiracy of her husband and his lover—Maisa was left facing the possibility that she might never be able to have a child. Driven by an overwhelming longing to become a mother, and following a successful surgery, she made the bold decision to undergo artificial insemination on her own in order to conceive. What followed was something she could never have anticipated. She stepped directly into the life of a man she had never imagined crossing paths with—and became pregnant with the child of an Alpha. Her unborn child would inherit Alpha blood. From that moment on, her journey of revenge against her ex-husband and her mission to protect her child truly began. Maisa was determined to repay every ounce of pain she had endured, to return the humiliation and suffering Brian had inflicted upon her to those who had destroyed her life. Along the way stood the father of the child she carried—Airden Kenneth, a powerful and immensely wealthy Alpha. Everything he possessed, every resource at his command, could become a weapon to help Maisa exact her revenge. Thus began a contract marriage between them. Bound together by an unborn child, their connection slowly deepened—but was it only the child that drew them closer, or were there other, unspoken reasons? When the revenge finally comes to an end, will Maisa and Airden be able to remain together, or will fate once again stand in their way?

" This is merely transactional," I said, his hand snaked around my neck, stealing my breath. He pulled me close. So close that I couldn’t see anything but him. His scent flooded my lungs leaving me breathless and for some reason, I liked it. " There's nothing transactional about the things I want to do to you, Srce moje," He said, his cold fingers brushed against my clit. **** Genevieve Henderson, CEO of H.Tech, loses everything in a single night—her company, her marriage, and the family she thought she could trust. Betrayed by her husband and cast aside by those who once called her their own, she is left with nothing but heartbreak and fury. Broken and desperate, Genevieve stumbles into the street—and straight into the path of her greatest enemy. Kade Petrović. Her business rival. A ruthless billionaire. The last man she should ever depend on. After saving her life, Kade makes her an offer she can’t afford to refuse: a one-year marriage in exchange for revenge. He will help her reclaim everything stolen from her—power, wealth, dignity—but the price is high. Trusting him means stepping into a world ruled by lies, contracts, and dangerous desires. She never planned to trust her rival. She never planned to fall for her husband. But in a marriage built on vengeance and secrets, love may be the most dangerous weapon of all. Will their alliance bring justice—or destroy them both?

“Wait.” His voice was soft as he stepped closer. “Who are you?” I turned back to him, my smile never wavering while I tried to slow my heart rate racing. “Oh, it's Emilia Cattaneo from Verona.” I lied. He stared at me, his gaze unwavering. “Funny because last week… you said your name was Juliette” My blood froze. He remembered? No way. My mouth opened. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. You must have mistaken me for someone else.” His smile vanished and I could make out the tick in his jaw. “Don’t lie to me in my house.” ****** He was never meant to fall for her. She was never meant to betray him. Isabella De Luca enters the world of the Romano mafia empire with one mission: destroy it from the inside. Armed with secrets and trained for deception, she becomes the perfect candidate for the mafia king’s bride — beautiful, bold, and completely fake. But Matteo Romano is not just a cold-blooded heir. He’s cunning, ruthless, and dangerously magnetic. The deeper Isabella sinks into his world, the harder it becomes to tell where the mission ends and where desire begins. When betrayal collides with bloodlines and a buried truth resurfaces, everything unravels. A deadly empire. A forbidden pregnancy. A woman torn between revenge and love. And a king who must choose between power… and the one person who was never supposed to matter. In this world, loyalty is currency. And trust? The deadliest weapon of all.

To be rejected by your fated mate is to be marked for death. Sloane Thorne has the scar to prove it. A rejection mark from Crew Harding, the boy who spent their entire lives tormenting her before destroying her in front of the entire pack. He murders her family, steals everything, and leaves her with a cursed mark that's slowly killing her. Three months later, she's hiding under a fake name when she collides with Kai Volkov. The Ice King. A second mate bond snaps into place. He sees Crew's mark on her skin. Assumes she's a spy and rejects her immediately. But Kai can't stay away. The bond won't let him. He takes her captive, swears it's for answers, but obsession doesn't need an excuse. Every touch sets them on fire. Every stolen glance is a war neither can win. Then Kai discovers what Crew has been hunting. What Sloane's family died protecting. What's been sleeping inside her all along. And suddenly, she's not just his mate. She's the weapon that could destroy them all. Now Crew wants her back. Collared, caged and his. But Kai Volkov doesn't share what's his. And Crew is about to learn that the hard way. But Sloane? She's done being claimed by Alphas who think she's theirs to break. Blood will spill. Alphas will fall. The question is whether she'll survive long enough to watch.

She’s a princess. She’s a weapon. She’s the illegitimate daughter no one was supposed to need. For millenia, peace between supernatural kingdoms has been maintained by a brutal tradition: the Bride Swap. An elven princess for a foreign king. Ten years of marriage to buy one hundred and ninety years of fragile silence. This year, the elves must give a bride to the werewolves. Princess Alicia Sunblade was never meant to be the chosen one. Wild, sharp-tongued, and dangerously gifted by both the goddess of war and the goddess of love, she lives in quiet exile from a father who rules with manipulation and fear. But when her king threatens the one person she loves most, Alicia is forced into an arranged marriage with Alpha Rocco Silvermane — the powerful, feared King of Wolfsreach. Elves and werewolves are natural enemies. Their borders bleed tension. Their histories drip with blood. Rocco is everything Alicia was raised to despise: dominant, ruthless, physically overwhelming — and politically untouchable. Yet he has his own kingdom to protect, his own factions to appease, and his own reasons for accepting the swap. Two rulers. Two unwilling sacrifices. One treaty balanced on a knife’s edge. But Alicia isn’t a lamb being led to slaughter. She is a strategist. A seductress blessed by divine persuasion. A warrior hiding behind silk and ceremony. If her father thinks he’s sending her away to be controlled, he may have just delivered his greatest weapon straight into enemy hands. Because if Alicia is going to be traded… She won’t just survive the wolves. She might just make their king kneel.