Contoh Teks Anekdot Stand Up Comedy

I received a pornographic video. "Do you like this?" The man speaking in the video is my husband, Mark, whom I haven't seen for several months. He is naked, his shirt and pants scattered on the ground, thrusting forcefully on a woman whose face I can't see, her plump and round breasts bouncing vigorously. I can clearly hear the slapping sounds in the video, mixed with lustful moans and grunts. "Yes, yes, fuck me hard, baby," the woman screams ecstatically in response. "You naughty girl!" Mark stands up and flips her over, slapping her buttocks as he speaks. "Stick your ass up!" The woman giggles, turns around, sways her buttocks, and kneels on the bed. I feel like someone has poured a bucket of ice water on my head. It's bad enough that my husband is having an affair, but what's worse is that the other woman is my own sister, Bella. *** “I want to get a divorce, Mark,” I repeated myself in case he didn't hear me the first time—even though I knew he'd heard me clearly. He stared at me with a frown before answering coldly, "It's not up to you! I'm very busy, don't waste my time with such boring topics, or try to attract my attention!" The last thing I was going to do was argue or bicker with him. "I will have the lawyer send you the divorce agreement," was all I said, as calmly as I could muster. He didn't even say another word after that and just went through the door he'd been standing in front of, slamming it harshly behind him. My eyes lingered on the knob of the door a bit absentmindedly before I pulled the wedding ring off my finger and placed it on the table.

Marcus Eastwood, a well known pauper who feeds on money earned from running other's errand have his life turned upside down after he found out his true identity, a scion of a hidden super rich family. It took only a night before he rise to power.

Getting pregnant by her boss after a one-night stand and suddenly leaving her job as stripper was the last thing Serena had hoped for, and to make matters worse he is the heir to the mafia. Serena is calm while Christian is fearless and outspoken but somehow the two have to make it work. When Christian forces Serena to go through with a fake engagement she tries her hardest to fit in the family and the luxurious life the women live while Christian is fighting as hard as he can to keep his family safe, but everything takes a turn when the hidden truth about Serena and her birth parents comes out. Their idea was to play pretend until the baby was born and the rule was to not fall in love, but plans don't always go as expected. Will Christian be able to protect the mother of his unborn child? And will they end up catching feelings for one another?

27-year-old Lilith Hill has never been with a man. When her friend pushes her to get into a secret relationship with the sexiest man alive, billionaire Kai Rivera, she jumps at the opportunity. But powerful men come from powerful families and she is just a little author who has no one backing her. What will she do when an unexpected pregnancy rocks the world. Will Kai forgive her for her deception? [Warning: Mature Content]

Bastien marries me only for duty. I reject him and leave for good by faking my death. Yet he goes crazy looking for me. He says he loves me when we meet again. No! I don't buy it. I can't let him steal my child! ** "She's not yours!" The front door was locked and deadbolted, but it only takes Bastien and his Betas a moment to break past those defenses. As Bastien towers in the doorway, his silver eyes glowing with barely contained fury, I realize it's all over. Everything I've worked for these past three years is already lost; every tear I've shed and sacrifice I've made has all been for nothing. I come to stand in front of my ex-husband. Goddess I’d forgotten how handsome he is; how tall. It doesn’t feel right to be so near him without our bodies touching; it takes all my strength not to reach out to him. “Hello Bastien.” Whatever he was expecting, it clearly wasn’t this. His silver eyes stop their hungry head-to-toe scan of my body, settling on my face and blinking in surprise. I can see the gears turning in his head, piecing together the puzzle of my presence here and replacing shock with confusion and anger. “Is that really all you have to say to me?” I cock my head to the side. “What would you have me say?” “I thought you were dead!” He barks, making my wolf tuck her tail between her legs. Unlike my wolf, I have more than enough bad memories and regrets to withstand his ire. “Oh I’m sorry, did my funeral get in the way of your wedding plans?”

What do you do when you lose your virginity to your next-door neighbor who so happens to be the egotistical bad boy of the entire town, who raises havoc wherever he goes and is the biggest player on the planet? Well, you guard your heart and stay away from him like everyone warned you to. Oh and pretend like nothing happened because what else can you expect from a bad boy? But what if it's too late to stay away? Especially since he's already had a taste of you and you of him? What if you wanted more? What if you were too late to guard your heart? What if you had already fallen for him even before you moaned out his name? Spinoff of this book ( Mia and Kade's story ) : TANGLED IN HIS SHEETS

.... ✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧ 𝕴𝖋 𝖞𝖔𝖚 𝖎𝖓𝖋𝖑𝖎𝖈𝖙 𝖕𝖆𝖎𝖓 𝖔𝖓 𝖒𝖊, 𝕴 𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖑 𝖒𝖆𝖐𝖊 𝖘𝖚𝖗𝖊 𝖞𝖔𝖚 𝖌𝖔 𝖙𝖍𝖗𝖔𝖚𝖌𝖍 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖘𝖆𝖒𝖊... ✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧⋄⋆⋅⋆⋄✧ 18 year old Valentina Smith a girl full of life. She had it all a normal girl could ask for. Good parents, good grades, friends that had her back, and a loving big brother. But one mistake of her brother leads to her walking down the aisle as the bride of the heartless Italian mafia Capo Alessandro Romano. Alessandro has been void of feelings for the past 2 decades while Valentina expresses herself. What happens when these two collide? Join the journey of Valentina as she is thrust into a new life of mafia, blood shed and illegal activities. In between all the chaos she tries to win over her heartless husband. She learns that no one could be trusted around her, maybe not even the man she has gotten used to call her husband. Will she be able to keep up the fight as she faces betrayal, pain and family secrets? Can she give up, after all she is bind to him by '𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗔𝗴𝗿𝗲𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁'.

Adeline Monteiro, An humble, Smart, Beautiful yet extremely broke lady. Living in a worn-out crabby-looking one-bedroom apartment in Manhattan and on the verge of being kicked out, Fed up and tired of her life, She goes to a club and drink her sorrow away. She ends up having too much to drink as she spends the night with The one and only Alexander McGuire. Imagine her surprise when she finds out that her one-night stand is her boss? The President of the Ashford group of companies Is she fucked? No, she’s doomed! Alexander wants Adeline by all means and he won’t be giving up so easily.

His f*ngers tangle in her hair, his warm breath fanning against her parted l*ps as he thr*sted up into her slowly. Bailey let out the most strangled m*an as Kaleb f*lled her with his g*rthy and l*ngthy c^ck. This was bad. She wasn't supposed to be sleeping with her best friend's brother. But here she was with his c^ck d*ep ins*de her and his t^ngue inside her m^uth. ~ Sequel to: Bestfriends Shouldn't Know How You Taste and Tangled In His Sheets

Joan Belle has been in love with Christopher Hale since they were teens. He is the CEO of Hale Industries, her friend, and her next-door neighbor. She dreamed one day, he would look her way. She made herself to be an admirable woman; a model on the side and a businesswoman, creating her own clothing line at a young age. However, despite her success, Christopher Hale never once asked her on a date. Countless times, she tried to catch his attention, but she failed miserably. Just when she thought she had lost all hope, Cole Adams, Christopher's best friend, an athlete, and a superstar model offered his cupid services. "Joan, if you want to win Christopher over, you have to show more. You are a model, but on normal days, you dress like a nun!” With his chiseled face and athletic frame, walking closer to Joan, he added, “Men are simple. , simple.” Along the way, Joan found out that someone secretly loved her. Who will she choose? *** WARNING: This is a romance novel. It contains mature content not suitable for young readers. Follow me on social media. Search Author_LiLhyz on IG & FB.