I'm Alive But Im Actually Dying Novels & Stories

My fated mate, Riven, was the Alpha of a pathetic pack on the brink of collapse. For five years, I was his shadow, his strategist. I built his pack from nothing until the Alliance finally recognized us, and we were set to move to the fertile lands. Riven promised we'd have our mating ceremony once we settled in the new territory. But at the celebration feast, the night before the move, he threw me in a cell. He publicly announced that Jenna—the she-wolf carrying his pup—would be the pack's Luna. I couldn't believe it. I screamed at him, but he just sneered and pointed to a crystal pulsing with dark magic. "Jenna already has proof of your betrayal! Sleeping with Alphas for their support. You make me sick!" I begged him. But he just sliced my cheek with the silver-edged rejection letter, formally casting me aside. But he didn't know who I really was. I am the Alpha King's daughter. The strategies, the power, the alliances—they weren't his. They were mine. So I took it all back.

Hiding from hunters was supposed to be simple, until Ivy transferred to Blackthorn Academy, a school where monsters wear crowns. Her first day ends in disaster when she spills coffee on Karl Draven, the ruthless Alpha Prince she later discovers is her fated mate. And just when she thought things couldn’t get worse, there is Damon Voss, the Vampire who once broke her heart, he's darker and more dangerous than ever. Between a bond she can’t deny, a past she can’t escape, and a secret that could destroy them all, Ivy’s life is spiraling into chaos. Because at Blackthorn, love is a weapon… and one of them will use it to betray her. When the truth comes out, Ivy will learn that sometimes the greatest threat isn’t the monsters hunting you, but the power sleeping inside her.

⚠️⛔ Explicit 18+ Content | Reader Discretion Strongly Advised. ***** “Room for one more?” Thorne murmured, his voice dark with hunger. He stroked his pierced cock, lining up carefully beside the bases. My heart pounded, my hole already maxed, but the omega in me craved more stretch. He pushed slowly, the head forcing past the ring alongside the knots, my walls screaming as they parted further. I cried out, my back arching, tears blurring my vision. The burn twisted sharply, pleasure exploding through it as Thorne sank inch by inch, his length rubbing the knots inside. Three cocks now, locked and throbbing, filling me beyond reason. Slick gushed forcefully, easing the impossible fit, my rim pulled so thin it fluttered visible. “Fuck, he's taking us all,” Aurelius groaned, his knot twitching hard. ~~~~~ In this explosive, infuriatingly hot Gay erotica compilation, filthy boys and dangerously hungry men chase the very thing they shouldn’t crave. They have high voltage desires to have their tight cracks shed apart, rimmed with sizes they never imagined exist and their girths straining, covered with slick. Glance through the pages in the most hidden corner of the world where no one would see you squirming. If you’re reading with a partner, fair warning: you’ll either test their patience or weaponize their hands. Women will be left breathless. Men will become needier than they expected. BUT DON’T BLAME ME IF YOU CAN’T STOP FLIPPING THE PAGES. ⚠️🔞‼️

EZREN: Kiss or kill. Those were always the two options left.. until the past walks back into my life in the form of blue eyes, ginger curls, and a tattoo he swears I should remember. Knox Graye. A diagnosed psychopath. Says he was my brother’s boyfriend. That I left him to die and that I hold the only truth to his death. He is everywhere. Digging up my lies. Ruining what’s left of my life. Call me ‘Cherry’ like it means something. I swear I hate it. I hate him. I don’t know if he wants closure, revenge, or just someone to break. Either way, I’m his target and his third option. KNOX: Everyone thinks I’ve got a loose screw in the head but they're wrong. I lost the whole damn toolbox, buried six feet under with the only person I ever loved. I've spent six years grieving. Dying in pieces while he rots away in a grave but now? Now someone else walk around in his bones, smiling with his lips like he fuckin’ owns it. Like I wouldn’t recognize my own goddamn Cherry. Except now he calls himself Ezren. Cute. He thinks he has been hiding behind top grades and golden-boy charm, but I built his whole damn maze. And now that he's close? I’m done with subtlety. I want chaos in his veins, his secrets peeled off like skin. I want to crawl into the part of his head where he still hears his brother’s laugh and whisper: “You were always mine." He doesn’t know it yet, but I’m going to dismantle him. Brick by fucking brick. And when he finally breaks, I’ll be there to offer him a choice. “Kiss or kill, Cherry?”

Two years ago, as a graduate of Werewolf Medical School, I volunteered to go to the most remote and poorest pack, as it had always been my dream to help werewolf patients in need. I heard from my teacher that the werewolves in the Rogue Pack were the poorest and that their living conditions were the worst. Most of the werewolves there were old and weak, so I volunteered to go to that pack as soon as I graduated. After I arrived, I helped them build an infirmary and even set up a blood station. Every year, I led them in voluntary blood donations. But one time—right after I had taken a short break following a blood donation—they turned on me. They slandered me, calling me a selfish and heartless healer. Worse still, they accused me of faking illness, claiming I was lying comfortably in bed while patients were dying—refusing to lift a finger to save them. Not only that, they stormed into the infirmary, seized all my herbs and equipment, and completely trashed the place I had built for them with my own hands. Recalling the days I had spent day and night healing them—only to see my infirmary destroyed and my dream shattered—I let out a bitter smile. I picked up the phone and called the dean of my home pack. "I'm ready to return," I said. "I want to serve the patients in our own pack." Then, without a trace of regret, I left that place behind. However, after I gave up, the whole pack regretted it and begged me to return.

During the eight years I spent by Alpha David’s side, I also raised the pup he had with my late sister. At his birthday banquet, I accidentally wore one of her old dresses. Eight-year-old Dorian grabbed a pot of freshly brewed coffee and poured it over me— right in front of the maids. The scalding liquid burned my skin, and when I looked up, I saw the same cold disgust in his eyes that I’d seen so many times in his father’s. “How dare you wear my mother’s dress?” he sneered. “You’ll never replace her. You killed her with that wicked heart of yours!” The coffee seared more than my flesh. It burned straight through my heart. I looked at the child I’d raised for eight long years. I didn’t feel angry. I didn’t even feel sad. Only a quiet kind of exhaustion. “Don’t worry,” I whispered. “I’ll leave tomorrow.”

A forbidden romance that feels so wrong but yet, so right. I was supposed to be his perfect wife. His breeding vessel, he'd said. Marcus Blackwell married me with a fake certificate, used my body to get me pregnant, and planned to steal my baby before throwing me away like garbage. So I ran and built an empire. I became everything he said I'd never be. And six years later, I'm back in New York—successful, powerful, untouchable. Until I meet HIM. The dark dangerous man I had a passionate one night stand with weeks ago. The same man who had given me sleepless nights just thinking about him. One night of passion that changes everything, and one problem that might destroy my one chance at happiness: He's my Ex-husband father. His hands gripped my hips as he thrust deeper, his breath hot against my neck. *"This is wrong," I gasped, even as my body arched into him, feeling him deep inside my core. " Ahh fuck,” I cried out loud as he pinched my nipples hard. “You're his father—" “And you're not his wife anymore,” he groaned roughly as his teeth grazed my throat. "You're mine now, and nothing will change that, my little rebel.” His thrust became faster as he pounded into me like an animal. “James!...hmmpph.” *"Scream my name again,” he growled. “Say you're mine!” “I'm yours," I whispered, hating myself for how much I meant it. “I'm so fucking yours, Daddy!” “His smile against my skin was pure sin. "Good girl. Now let me show you what it's like to be worshipped instead of used." James Blackwell doesn't just want revenge on his son. He wants me; Completely, Obsessively, and Permanently. But Marcus isn't done destroying me.

At the family recognition banquet meant to introduce the real heiress, a stream of floating comments suddenly appeared before my eyes: [So, the real heiress tried to get back at the fake one by stealing the engagement gift from her and the male lead and got caught red-handed.] [Even if she’s technically the fiancée, he knows who he really loves. The fake heiress is the one he actually wants.] [What fiancée? She’s just a thief. Send her back to whatever slum she crawled out of.] Dressed in a princess gown and surrounded by admirers, the fake heiress, Luna Lawson, walked up to me: “Risa, you’re finally back. Mom, Dad, and I have missed you so much. From now on, we’re a family.” I quietly kept eating my fried chicken. When Luna saw me ignore her, her eyes suddenly reddened. Then she reached into my worn backpack and pulled out a ladies’ wristwatch. “Why did you steal the engagement gift Brian gave me? I know you’re dissatisfied with me, but that doesn’t mean you can become a thief!” My fiancé, Brian Cook, looked at me with open disgust. “Return it to Luna right now, then get out of this house.” Under the scornful gazes of the guests, I pointed at the man on stage, my father, who was clinking glasses with Luna’s adoptive father, and asked in confusion. “What exactly did I steal? I’m not here for some family reunion. I just came along with my boss to grab a free meal.” The comments exploded: [This is way too awkward. She’s not the real heiress; she’s just an employee?!]

I spent three days and three nights decorating the altar for my mating ceremony. My mate, Alpha Alec, used it to pledge himself to another woman. His dead brother’s mate. I rushed to confront him, but before I could speak, Serena clutched her chest and collapsed. Furious, Alec threw me in the silver room, leaving me to suffer as the silver burned through my veins. "My brother died before he could claim her! I was giving Serena the ceremony she deserved. Why did you have to ruin it?" "Serena's wolf is weak because of you. You'll stay here until she wakes up. Think about what you've done." Three years later, the Lycan King, Damien, returned to the North with his mate. He was hosting a summit for the Alliance at a top-tier lakeside resort. Alec arrived with Serena, who was dripping in luxury. He was there to beg Damien for control over the Alliance's new project on the Genetic Decay. He saw me being blocked by the guards and glanced at the file in my hands. "I heard you bonded with some rogue, a worthless wolf with a tainted bloodline, just to spite me. Regretting it now?" "If you beg me, I might consider getting you in." I didn't even bother to look at him. Damien had left a critical report at home. I had to get it to him before the summit meeting.

On the night of Halloween, my best friend, Mina Corvelle, rushes to save the black cat before me, triumph dancing in her eyes. That is when I, Elora Aldridge, realize that she has been reincarnated, too. In my past life, she scorned the stray for being filthy, so she kept her distance. So, it was I who took pity on the cat and rescued it. When I walked past an old blind woman manning a roadside stall, she told me that the cat was a rare dark fortune cat. Once it recognized a master, it would draw dark riches from all directions and bring unimaginable wealth. I dismissed it as superstition. Yet, the very next day, I was inexplicably promoted to director of the department. Soon after, my family's dilapidated old house found itself part of a redevelopment scheme, and we were given compensation of eight apartments and 30 million dollars in cash. Even the enigmatic golden boy of Lakeshire, Cassian Mercer, started to pursue me relentlessly, declaring that he would only marry me and no one else. But not long after I married Cassian, Mina trapped me—and the black cat—inside the apartment. She then set it on fire, burning us alive. Outside the inferno, she screamed, "Why should you get everything without even lifting a finger? All those riches should've been mine!" When I open my eyes again, I find myself back at the very intersection.