Novel & Cerita I'm Loser

“—I am an asshole and I was meant to lose her.” @cycy

When i took it out i felt like i was on cloud nine. I started smilling because i can see her face now with my eyes open. Tears started to roll from my eyes and he asked " What happened man?" I smile and said " I loved her but i misunderstood her , I didn't stand for her, For us, I am a loser , I am coward."

“What is it, Lucas?” “What is it? Do you want to know what is wrong? I’ll tell you what is wrong, okay? What's wrong is that I am a coward. A useless human being. A heartbreaker. What is wrong is that I am weak. A pathetic loser. I am ashamed of how much I lost. And the worst thing is that now, the whole world is watching me lose. What is wrong? That’s what’s wrong! You get it now?” he spoke in a deep shrill, almost making me tear down again.

"You don't love me. Not in the past life, and not in this one. Your madness now is just because you found out Elena was a fraud, and your ego took a hit. You saving me is just to pay off that ridiculous 'debt' in your head." "You've moved yourself to tears acting like a hero. But to me, your redemption feels just as suffocating as your abuse."

That's what you are. "I'm just a loser." I found myself mumbling the phrase repeatedly like it was a chant, then slowly crouching in a corner with my hands wrapped round my knees. "Kerik!" Her voice boomed the atmosphere and I became forced to turn to her direction to listen to what she had to say. "You are not a loosed! Listen to me," I turned my gaze towards hers and though I couldn't see her face, I felt her presence and danced to the tone of her voice. "You are a winner, the strong one. You-"

A bitter truth? Ain't I myself an imposter then? Just like everyone?

I think I am broken. -----------

"I told you I hate pathetic losers..." "And I am responsible for my feelings. I can't hold it in and pretend I'm fine just to please you... Yes, I'm pathetic... I'm a loser, this is who I am, and you have no right to judge me or think that I'm not being who you want me to be. Leave me alone! You all should leave me the hell alone!" I broke down in tears.

The only reason why I liked to throw some punches at him but the fact that even when he knew that he was not as powerful as compared to me from the very start he always tried his best making this habit of his quite interesting to me but it seemed that even he was not the same anymore. “You know very well how much I hate losers so you are not allowed to give up like this.” Even when I was just saying this so that he would feel motivated and give his all to have a fair match with me it felt as if I was saying all of this to myself because at some point I was also starting to become a complete loser in this matter as I never thought that I will start thinking that it will become impossible for

I'm so fucked. *****************************************