I Swear I Still Hate Him Novels & Stories

I buried him myself. I stood at his grave with dirt on my hands and grief in my throat as I said goodbye to the only man I ever thought I would love. Kael was my betrothed, my mate, the boy who grew up beside me and became the person I built every future around. When the war took him it did not just take him — it took every version of myself that existed because of him. Years passed. The moon goddess, in her mercy, gave me something I never asked for — a second chance. Rowan was not supposed to happen. He was patient where I was resistant, steady where I was broken, and present in every way I had convinced myself no one would ever be again. I did not want to love him. And then I did not know how to stop. I was finally learning what it meant to choose life again. When Kael walked back through my door. Alive. Unchanged. And completely unable to explain where he had been. Now I am torn between a love that was written into my soul before I was old enough to understand what souls were, and a man who chose me quietly and completely when I had nothing left to offer. The elders say this is not a reverse harem blessing. There is no keeping both. I have to choose. But how do you bury someone you love twice?

They say that your past is never really left in your past. I used to think that was dumb until I experienced it. Four years ago, I met the Devil. He gave me a chance to flee from him but I refused and ended up shooting him. Unfortunately for me, he returned four years later to claim me as his wife and drag me to Hell. He's going to make sure I pay for shooting him. He's going to punish me in the worst ways possible. He has promised to make me beg for mercy he'll never grant me. But then, he's not the only one hellbent on making my life a living Hell. There's another person causing havoc from the shadows. I would have to choose eventually- be with the Devil I know or side with the Devil I do not know.

Gabriel Steele was the most disciplined Alpha in the northern territories. A man who ruled his pack by order, law, and absolute authority. Which was exactly why our mating was a disaster. Last life, when my father handed me the Steele Marking Contract, I signed it without hesitation. I thought becoming Luna meant belonging somewhere. Instead, I spent years being laughed at. At pack galas, noble she-wolves whispered behind my back. “Wait—that woman with the green hair and the tiny skirt is our Luna?” “She looks like she walked straight out of a nightclub.” “No discipline, no manners… how embarrassing for the pack.” Cassian didn’t defend me； “Forgive her. She still has much to learn about pack discipline.” Discipline? Like I was some unruly wolf that needed breaking. So I buried my claws, silenced my instincts, and lived inside his laws— until the wolf inside me withered away. When I opened my eyes again— I was back at the moment the mating contract was placed before me. This time, I wrote another name on the contract. Amelia. She can have the disciplined Alpha. As for me— I’d rather be a wild she-wolf than anyone’s perfect Luna. But the moment Gabriel realized the bride wasn’t me—The Alpha who lived by iron law Broke every rule he had ever sworn to follow.

Our bodies tangled in the car. My husband moved inside me, lips claiming my chest, when the sudden ring of a phone ripped me out of our intoxicating haze. Gabriel answered without hesitation. It was one of his closest friends from the medical world, speaking in German. “Don,” the voice said casually, “your mistress is two months pregnant. What are you going to do?” Gabriel didn’t pause. His tone was calm. “Grace can’t have children,” he replied. “I’ll let her carry the baby to term, then adopt it as my own. That secures the heir. This stays between us.” Something inside me froze. The one thing he had forgotten— I majored in German. And he learned it just to win me. I didn’t scream. I didn’t confront him. Instead, I smiled, stayed quiet, and kept playing the perfect wife. Later, I slipped the divorce papers into a real estate contract and watched him sign without reading. Then I quietly registered a new identity. For the next three days, his absence—and her taunting messages—erased the last illusions I had about love. When my new identity finally went live, I walked away without looking back. Carrying his child. And disappearing from his world forever.

All it took was a gunshot to have this criminal fucking me senseless. I'd spent months trying to bring down Antonio, the criminal I swore to put behind bars. I even set a trap for him, using someone close as bait. But instead of going down in chains, Antonio offered himself to me, in exchange for freedom. I should have said no, I should have followed the mission. But as a lonely divorcee craving warmth, how could I resist the way he touched me? The way his fingers made me forget the rules I live by? This wasn't the plan. My boss didn't send me here to get addicted to my enemy. Yet every secret night with Antonio leaves me wanting more, and drags me deeper into his dangerous world. He's supposed to die for his crimes, but unfortunately, the real crime is how badly I want him. And if the news gets out, I won't just lose my job– I'll lose my life.

After finishing work for the day, I checked my phone and realized I had been added to a group chat called "Catch the Thief." The members were my parents, my brother, Brian Wise, and my sister-in-law, Paulene Wise. I typed a question mark. Paulene replied instantly. [My jewelry is missing. I didn't add you here to accuse you or anything. I just wanted to ask what you think. Honestly, there's no use for other people in our family to take my jewelry, so I've been wondering... I'm not saying you definitely stole it. But if you did, you don't have to deny it. I'm willing to give you a chance to make things right.] My mother said nothing. She just kept tagging me over and over. I let out a small laugh and typed back. [Maybe Brian took it and gave it to his side piece. I'm not saying he definitely has someone else. Just that men his age sometimes start looking around. I'm only guessing here. And if he really did mess up, you could give him a chance to make things right, too.]

Everyone said my good looks were what saved me from my family's downfall. It was how I managed to become a Donna. I was the only one who knew why he had to compromise to marry me. Xavier Whitmore, the tall and handsome Don, was unable to have physical relationships with a woman. When I shyly took off the gown on our wedding night, he sat in his chair and lit a cigarette before remarking in an icy voice, "I'm allergic to women. That said, you have my word that you will be the only woman in my life." He kept his promise. Though he never so much as touched me in the five years of our marriage, he provided me with a life of luxury and wealth. Although it was merely a title, being his only woman brought me happiness. Everything changed on the day my men and I were ambushed by a rival mafia family. We barely made it out alive. When I returned home, I found him locked in a tight embrace with his widowed sister-in-law, Alice Ortega. "Alice, I won't let you remarry. If you do, I'll make sure that man dies a thousand deaths." I scoffed. It wasn't so much that he couldn't handle being physical with a woman. It was simply that he could not be physical with anyone but her. In that case, she could have the pleasure of being the Donna.

My biggest mistake was marrying the Alpha who hated me. To him, I was never a wife or a Luna, just a living blood bank kept alive to save the woman he loved. My stepsister. He believed every lie she told him and never once chose to believe me. When I finally couldn’t endure it anymore and walked away, he was certain I would come crawling back. He was so sure I wouldn’t survive without him. But I didn’t return. I died instead. At least, that’s what the world believes. Only after my death did he begin to question everything. Only then did the truth surface. Only then did he realize that the woman he destroyed was the only one who had ever loved him without conditions. They say death ends everything. For me, it was only the beginning. Now… I am the Alpha’s greatest regret.

For three years, I was his hidden Omega mate.I fought for him. I built his pack. I became his top warrior.But on our third anniversary, he chose a noble lady for power… and announced their marriage. I burned every gift.Awakened my royal blood.Broke the mate bond he thought he owned. I will never be your secret.Never your shadow.Never your mistress. I reject you, Alpha.This is my revenge.

“What do you want?" A smile played on his lips. “I'll tell you five things.” He slowly walked around me. I tried not look at him as I waited for whatever he wanted to say. “One, I will make love to you and you will enjoy it.” He smirked when he saw the look on my face. “You're insane if you think..” “Second, I will make love to you over and over again, any day, anytime I want.” He grinned when I got uncomfortable. “Mr. Grey ..” “Third, you will not tell anyone, not even Vera. You will not tell her you've been fucking her husband.” He smiled. “I want to see you try.” I snapped. “I will not let you get away with this.” “Four, I will divorce Vera because it's you that I want.” My heart skipped a beat. Why is he doing this? “You will not hurt Vera like that. I will not let you.” I said, moving closer to him. “Fifth, we will get married and live happily ever after and you'll give me babies and you will not feel bad for your sister.” He concluded.