Chapter 6

                                 Misty

I cry as I drive home, unable to stop the tears from pouring from my eyes. As I sob, I curse the moon goddess for giving me such a horrible mate. I've loved and worshipped her as long as I could remember and this is how she repays my love for her, by giving me a horrible mate. A mate that Doesn't wants me. 

I will always be known as the mateless she-wolf around the pack. Maybe I should just leave to avoid the shame that this will bring me once all my friends have found their mates and I'm still alone, watching everyone else around me live happy lives with their mates.

When I get home, I head straight up the stairs locking myself inside my room. I turn the music on to drown out my cries as I'm unable to stop the tears from pouring from my eyes.

I lay on my bed as I continue to cry, wondering why this is happening to me.

His words continue to play over and over again in my mind. "I don't want you, because I just Don't want you. Just because we're supposedly fated to be together doesn't mean anything. I don't know you and you don't know me. I Don't have to give in to some bond that I don't want. You're nothing to me." I began to cry more as his word stabs me like a knife, going deeper and deeper every time those words repeat themselves in my head.

He stood there with a straight face and told me that I meant nothing to him. How can he be so heartless? How could he say those things to me? He's right, I Don't know him and he Don't know me, but that pull and attraction that I feel towards him is something that's hard to simply just ignore. But for him, it's like he feels nothing. He seems empty and heartless inside.

Maybe that's why he has been marked as a dishonorable male because he's a heartless monster. 

The music continued to play, drowning out my cries. Going there was a bad idea. The first time I went there I saw that he was marked and instead of staying away as everyone knows to do, I still went back there a second time. 

I told myself I was going to get the answers to my questions, but I know that was only half of the reason for me going back there. A part of me wanted to see him again. A part of me wanted to be near him, wanted to smell his scent again. Maybe even find out his name.

Knowing where he's at, it's hard to fight away the temptation of wanting to go there to him. When I'm far away, I Don't feel the pull of the bond, but that still doesn't help much. It's like a drug. I've had a whiff of his scent, I've seen and felt the attraction and pull towards him and now I want it all again. And I know exactly where to get my fix and its hard not to want to go there to him.

I wish I was heartless like him, then I would feel the same way he does. He would mean nothing to me as I do to him. I could just go on with my everyday life and not think twice about him. 

But that's not the person I am. I'm not heartless prrson and I can't just simply push all of this away like its nothing to me.

I look over, seeing the paper with his address on it, laying on the bed as I continue to cry. I reach over grabbing the paper and ball it up before throwing it across the room against the wall. 

That female should never have given me his stupid address. Maybe things would be a bit easier if I didn't know where he was. If I didn't go there. If I didn't see him again.

I was hurt the first time he walked away from me and now I'm only hurting more from going to see him.

*****

The next day I cry to myself in my car on my way to work. Once I get to work, I struggle to hold it all inside as I interact with the customers that come in. I drag myself around the restaurant, hurting inside. I don't want to be here, but I can't just stay home locked in my room all day, that will only cause my family to question if I'm okay. 

I wish I could just disappear and forget about everything. Forget about ever seeing him. I was impatiently waiting for the day that I found my mate as every wolf is, but now I wish I never found him. That way I wouldn't be feeling this way and I'll be living my normal happy everyday life, but fate always forces mates to cross paths someway somehow.

After work, I go straight home and lock myself inside my room. The tears fall from my eyes as I silently cry to myself. No matter how much I try not to think about him, I still do. Even after what he said to me a part of me wants to see him again. He's a heartless asshole that probably deserves to live the rest of his days alone. 

I lay here constantly wiping my tears away as they slowly fall from my eyes, knowing he probably hasn't thought once about me after I left.

"Misty, dinner is ready." My brother says, knocking on the door.

I sit up and wipe away my tears. I swallow a few times and clear my throat to make sure my voice Don't crack as I go to say something. "Tell momma to put my a plate up. I'm a bit tired from working. I'm going to get some sleep." I tell him.

"Okay." He says.

Hearing him walk away from my bedroom door, I lay back down as those thoughts of him force their way back into my head.