CHAPTER 1

Seraphina’s Pov

I was dripping wet and the ceremony hadn't even started yet.

My fingers gripped the edge of the vanity as I stared at myself in the mirror while my thighs pressed together. I needed some kind of relief from the ache between my legs that had been getting worse for months now. 

The white ceremonial dress clung to every curve I had developed over the past year, and the thin fabric showed my hard nipples pushing against it because I couldn't stop thinking about him.

Dimitri.

My guardian who would probably kill me if he knew what I was thinking right now, which was how badly I wanted him to bend me over this vanity and take me hard from behind while I watched in the mirror. 

I was sick. The man raised me for two years, but at this point, I didn't care anymore.

My body burned for him in ways that made me touch myself every night, while I bit my pillow so nobody would hear me moan his name.

"Stop it, Seraphina," I whispered to myself, but my body didn't listen because just thinking about his massive hands, and how they would feel wrapped around my throat, while he pushed inside me made more wetness pool between my legs.

I knew my panties were completely soaked through.

He was so strict with me and never let any unmated male even look at me too long before he would growl and step in front of me.

His huge body that made me feel small, protected and desperately horny all at the same time. 

Last week, he caught Drew talking to me near the training grounds and he grabbed him by the throat, throwing him across the field as his eyes turned red.

I had to race all the way to my room because watching him get violent and possessive over me made me so wet that I thought I would leave a puddle on the ground.

The worst part was how he never touched me except for necessary things like helping me up if I fell during training, but even those brief moments when his skin met mine sent electricity through my whole body.

Sometimes, I would pretend to stumble just so he would catch me with those massive arms and I could smell his scent of pine and whiskey that made me want to drop to my knees and beg him to use my mouth however he wanted.

"You're going to hell, Seraphina." I told my reflection, but I was already rubbing my thighs together again thinking about how he looked yesterday when he came back from patrol.

He was shirtless and sweaty with his black hair sticking to his forehead and his gray eyes scanning the pack house until they landed on me.

I swear they got darker before he turned away and disappeared into his office where he probably stayed to avoid me like he had been doing for months.

Did he have any idea what he did to me when he used his Alpha voice during pack meeting? 

Everyone would submit, while I would sit there, fighting not to moan because his dominance made my whole body ache to submit to him in completely different ways than pack hierarchy demanded. 

Did he notice how I always sat with a pillow on my lap during those meetings because I was terrified everyone would smell how aroused his commands made me?

"Please let him be my mate." I whispered to the Moon Goddess even though I knew it was wrong, twisted and probably impossible, but I didn't care.

I would rather die than watch him mate someone else and have to listen to him claiming another woman, while I touched myself and pretended it was me underneath him, taking his knot.

The door opened and I jumped, my hands flying to smooth down my dress as Natasha walked in with a warm smile that made me relax.  She was the only mother figure I had since my parents died.

"Look at you, sweet girl," She flashed me a wide smile as she came up behind me.

She began fixing my long silver blonde hair into the traditional ceremony style while her green eyes met mine in the mirror. 

"You're absolutely glowing tonight and the dress fits perfectly on that beautiful body of yours."

"Thank you, Natasha." I blushed, trying to calm my breathing because I was still throbbing between my legs. I prayed she couldn't smell how aroused I was. 

"I'm just nervous about shifting for the first time and maybe finding my mate, if the Moon Goddess decides I'm worthy."

She hummed, braiding sections of my hair with gentle fingers that had done this so many times when I was young, scared and missing my parents. 

"Every wolf finds their mate eventually, darling and yours will be special because you're special. I know someone has been watching you specifically, and who knows? He could turn out to be your mate."

My heart instantly skipped a beat at her words. Could she be talking about Dimitri? Did Natasha know about all the filthy thoughts that had been filling my head about her brother?

"What do you mean?" I asked warily, the blush on my cheeks intensifying. 

Natasha just smiled and continued working on my hair, while I watched her in the mirror, wondering exactly what she was talking about.

"My brother has been very protective of you, hasn't he?" She said casually and my heart skipped another beat. She really was talking about Dimitri. 

My face burned and I had no idea what to say but she was not done talking.

"He is a little bit rough around the edges, but Mikhail is a good person.” She said and my heart instantly sank low in my chest. She was talking about her younger brother.

Mikhail was the third of the Volkov siblings and I honestly didn’t care for him. The only one I had my eye on was Dimitri. The one man I couldn’t have.

Natasha held out her hand, helping me stand. 

"Come now. Everyone is waiting. The moon will reach its apex soon which means your shift will begin and then we'll all see what the Moon Goddess has planned for you tonight."

I took her hand and let her lead me toward the door while my heart pounded. In less than an hour, I would shift for the first time and possibly find my mate.

All I could think about was whether Dimitri would be there, watching me with those steel gray eyes that haunted my dreams.

We walked down the hallway toward the ceremonial grounds and I could hear the pack gathering outside while the full moon rose higher in the sky. 

Natasha squeezed my hand as we reached the door and I could smell him before I saw him, because that pine and whiskey scent hit me so hard my knees almost buckled.

He was standing at the north point of the circle in his ceremonial Alpha robes and when his eyes met mine across the distance, something dangerous flashed in them that instantly made me weak in the knees.