Blueprint Of My Heart

  Nyla Avenor

The first time I met Soren Calder, he told me I was fired, I hadn't even started working yet, I stared at him across the enormous desk, waiting for the joke, it didn't come. “I'm sorry?” 

Soren Calder finally looked up from my resume, he was younger than I had expected, maybe early thirties. Dark hair, sharp features, and the kind of expensive suit that probably cost more than my monthly rent, his expression remained completely blank.

“You heard me.

I looked around his office, maybe I had walked into the wrong room, “I was told to report here for an interview and you're firing me?”

“Yes,” he said, I let out a short breath,“ this is my first time meeting you and how did you decide I'm fired?” his eyes dropped to the resume in front of him, “your qualifications.” I almost laughed, I had spent years working toward this position.

I had stayed late, taken terrible projects, worked weekends, and built a portfolio that had finally gotten the attention of one of the biggest development firms in the city, now this man was dismissing me without asking a single question, “did you actually read my resume?”

His eyes lifted, that was when I realized I had made a mistake, not because he looked angry, but he didn't, he looked interested, and somehow, that was worse, “I read enough.”

I should have stopped, instead I reached across the desk and took my resume, “If you're going to reject me, at least have the decency to give me a real reason, ”his gaze followed my hand, “you're very confident.” I looked up at him, “no, I'm prepared.”

His face changed and I couldn't tell if I had annoyed him or impressed him and neither option mattered anymore as I turned toward the door. “Ms. Avenor” I stopped, “sit down.”  I looked over my shoulder, he was still sitting behind his desk, calm as ever, “no," I said.

His eyebrows rose, I smiled, “you already fired me.” For the first time, Soren Calder looked genuinely caught off guard, I opened the door. “Good luck finding someone else,” as I keep my eyes straight  walking out.

“That's the problem,” I stopped, his voice had changed completely, I slowly turned around, Soren picked up a file from beside my resume, “there's no one else,” my hand remained on the door, “what does that mean?”

“It means, you're the only architect who made it through the final selection.” I stared at him, “then why did you fire me?” he stood and suddenly, the room felt smaller, “because I don't want you on my project.” I watched him slowly trying to know what I have done wrong, “then we're done here.”

He walked around the desk and stopped a few feet away, “your father designed the original proposal." Everything inside me went still, my father, he hadn't been mentioned once during the interview process, Soren watched my expression carefully, “you knew him?”

“I knew his work."

That wasn't an answer as I stepped away from the door, “what does my father have to do with this?” Soren held my gaze, “everything,” and just like that, the interview I had come here to have became something else entirely.

“Everything,” the word stayed between us, I stared at Soren waiting for him to explain, he didn't, “what exactly are you saying?” I asked. Soren finally looked at me, “your father was involved in the original development proposal.”

“You said he designed it, then why didn't anyone tell me?” that was the first real crack in his composure, “I don't know what they told you during the selection process.”

“Nothing about my father.”

“That's because your father's involvement isn't part of the position you're applying for.” I gave him a disbelieving look, “you just told me it's everything.” he stood up walking round his office, “It is to me.” The answer stopped me because their was something personal behind his eyes now, I folded my arms. “What happened between you and  my father?”

He finally sat down looking around the wonderfully made ceiling of his office, “nothing. "My expression changed, “you've known me for less than fifteen minutes, and you have already fired me, changed your mind, and brought up my dead father, I think I've earned the right to ask.”

For a moment, I thought he might actually answer, instead he returned to his desk and picked up the file, “you came here for a job, then forget about everything else and decide whether you want it.” I stared at him, “you're giving me the job?” I asked,“ he crossed his legs together, "I didn't say that.”

I looked into his eyes, “you said I'm the only architect who made it through the final selection.” Soren looked down, “you want this project? then prove you deserve it.” My irritation rose, “you're making this unnecessarily complicated." Soren stared at me for some seconds “no, I'm making it difficult,” he replied.

I let out a short breath “so what's the difference? Soren turned his black leather swivel chair to face me directly, “complicated means you don't understand what's happening,” he slid the file towards me, “difficult means you understand exactly what you're getting into.”

I looked down at the file, the project was larger than anything I'd worked on before, a luxury development covering several acres in the heart of the city, residential towers, commercial spaces, a private hotel and public gardens, and beneath the project title was a familiar name, my father's company.

My fingers stopped moving, I hadn't seen that name in years, after my father's death, the company had been sold, everything connected to his work had slowly disappeared from our lives, and at least that's what I had believed, "why is his company listed here?” Soren didn't answer, I looked up “Soren,” his eyes met mine, “because the original project belonged to him.”

I straightened my posture “that doesn't make sense, he died before this development was approved,” I said. he watched me carefully “before the current development was approved,” the distinction caught me and I stared at him, “what aren't you telling me?” He lowered his voice “quite a lot.”

I almost laughed, at least he was honest about that, I closed the file. “Then I'm not accepting the position.” Soren's expression changed barely as I saw it.“You've been trying to get this position for months and you've spent years building your portfolio for an opportunity like this and now you're walking away because I won't tell you everything about your father?”

I watched Soren bodly, “I'm walking away because you clearly have information about my family that you expect me to work around without explaining.” He leaned back, “you don't trust me.” I turned toward the door, “thank you for your time.”

“Your father didn't trust me either."

I stopped, my hand froze around the door handle. Slowly, I turned back, Soren was watching me, “what did you just say?” He stood and walked toward the desk, “my father and yours worked together for six years.” I stared at him, that wasn't possible, my father had never mentioned Soren Calder, not once, “your father knew mine?” I asked. Soren nodded, “very well.” I couldn't speak, he reached for the file and pulled out a single sheet of paper, then he placed it on the desk between us.

I walked closer, the handwriting hit me first, my father's handwriting, and I knew it immediately, my eyes moved across the page, their were only a few lines, but one sentence made my stomach drop

"If anything happens to me, keep Soren Calder away from my daughter."

I looked up, Soren was already watching me, neither of us spoke, for the first time since I'd entered his office, I wasn't thinking about the job anymore, I was thinking about why my father had been afraid of him.