Your fault

The sickening scent of blood filled the air. Dead and battered bodies littered the ground. They are not bodies of random people. On the contrary, the bodies belong to all familiar faces; my family, my friends, and my pack members.The sound of wails, groans and grunts took over the once peaceful land.

Tears streamed down my cheeks as the horrific view made my stomach churn.

Cries of help travelled to my ears but apart from the dead bodies on the ground,no life could be spotted.

" This is all your fault!" A creepy voice whispered in my ears and I shook my head frantically.

My fault? How could that be?

" You could have saved them, but you chose yourself. All their deaths are on you. Their blood will haunt you to insanity!" Then the voice burst out laughing.

Dark. Sinister. That would be the perfect explanation of how the laughter sounded.

It emanated from the depths of hell, perhaps from the grim reaper himself.

A sudden change of scene had me smiling.

There he was. Alive. He was still breathing.

His face was blurry, it always is . The sweet smile as he looks at me sends butterflies swarming in my stomach.

But my happiness doesn't last.

A knife is plunged deep into his heart and even as he takes his last breath, he still has that smile.

" Nooooo!" I let out a piercing scream, sitting up from my bed, covered in sweat and panting for breath.

I try taking deep breaths to calm down my racing heart but nothing seems to work.

The sound of my phone ringing is like a call of salvation.

" Linda…" My brother's sweet and calming voice calls from the other end.

I try to take deep breaths not to alarm him but he knows me too well.

" You had another nightmare?" He inquires and I fight the urge to cry.

" I'm tired, Kai. It's killing me. I can't do this anymore." I sniff back my tears.

" Did you take your meds before sleeping?" He probes and I nod, suddenly remembering that he's not with me to read my gestures.

" They are no longer helping. I doubled the dose, nothing is helping." I replied.

My brother, Kaiser, says nothing for almost a minute, prompting me to confirm if he's still on the line.

" Come home Belinda. It's about time the family knows about this. It's been five years already, don't you miss us?" My brother's sweet voice brings a smile on my face, albeit a sad one.

Yes, it's been five years since I made the decision to leave my pack to live among humans. Five years of battling with the pain of rejection and nightmares. For five years, I have lived in a prison called freedom.

" You know I can't. My graduation isn't until next week." I replied. Lies.

I graduated two years ago and was working at a research centre. I was now a renowned doctor and researcher. The humans even nicknamed me the miracle doctor.

I have found people who have accepted me and appreciated me. Maybe I have been basking in this glory for so long that I no longer wanted to go home.

" Are you still not ready to face him? He moved on, he's happy with her. There is no reason for you to do this." Kaiser's words work as a catalyst, stirring my emotions, making me choke a sob.

How can I tell my brother that it's no longer about him; that I'm scared that going back would make my dreams a reality?

What if I'm greeted by the sight that always plagues my dreams?

I'm scared.

How can I tell him that me going back might kill them all?

I am a plague, my mate was right about that.

" You always bring disaster wherever you go. Anybody who associates with you ends up tragically. Do you think that I can risk this pack's safety for a damn mating bond?" Those were his words before rejecting me publicly, making me a joke in my pack.

He was actually not wrong.

Thanks to me, he lost his parents at a young age.

Luna Miranda and Alpha Simon died saving my pathetic life as he likes to call it.

" You should have died instead of my parents. You are useless to this pack!" He had spat those words, not caring whether they would hurt me or not.

" I'll be home after graduation." I finally made the decision.

" That's great, I'll inform Mom and Dad of the good news." I could hear the excitement in my brother's voice.

He was happy that I was going back home after wandering for five years.

I could not say I shared the same excitement. The mere thought of arriving to a bloodshed made goosebumps cover my skin.

" No, I'd rather surprise them." I don't want them to know that the black sheep of the family would be back. I don't know if I am ready to face them. I had made the decision to leave home in a haste.

I wanted to change myself and be someone better, most importantly, I wanted to get away from hearing snide remarks about me. They broke me more than I cared to admit.

I had watched my parents smile painfully when I announced that I would be leaving.

I'm sure it must have hurt them knowing that they could not be there when I needed them the most.

" If that's what you want, you will always have my support." Those were my father's words as he hugged me goodbye.

My mother said nothing, she only sobbed silently in my father's arms

It broke me to see them that way but I had to leave, not only for myself but for all of us.

" Alright, I will be waiting." My brother said, disconnecting the call.

Heaving a sigh of relief,I climb down the bed, making my way to the bathroom.

After a quick shower,I headed out to the hospital.

I had an ongoing research project and if I would be returning to the pack,I needed to submit the results.

" Good morning doctor Mathews,are you early today?"