Breaking My Back Abroad, She Had Her Second Child

The restaurant was filled with the clamor of overlapping conversations and the clinking of plates and cutlery, yet everything faded into a distant blur.

The man still chatted with a regular at the next table while he complained about how exhausting his life had become.

“Man, I swear, I was born to work myself to death.”

“Ever since Sophia took over this place, I’ve been stuck here with her. I have to keep an eye on the restaurant every single day. It’s more exhausting than having a regular job.”

He complained about how tired he was, yet he could not hide the smug smile spreading across his face. He practically basked in his own happiness.

My fingernails dug into my palms. The sharp sting of pain brought me back to my senses.

I reminded myself that I could not act rashly.

I forced a stiff smile onto my face, pulled out the chair beside me, and sat down.

“Business is booming, huh? I deliver supplies to restaurants around the neighborhood. I saw how busy your place was, so I thought I’d stop by and see if there might be a chance for us to work together.”

He gave me a quick once-over. He apparently did not suspect anything, and he replied, “Sure. Just leave your catalog over there. My wife can take a look when she gets back.”

There it was again, mentioning his wife.

After he said that, he pointed toward the little boy playing with his Transformers toy a short distance away. Pride filled his face.

“See that kid? That’s my oldest boy, Zach. He’s four. He just started preschool, and his teacher can’t stop praising him. Says he’s smart and much more well-behaved than the other kids.”

The boy must have heard his name because he dropped his toy and scampered over on his little legs. He wrapped his arms around Austin’s thigh.

“Daddy!”

That single word rang out bright and clear, yet it pierced through me like a knife. My chest tightened until I could barely breathe.

I thought about myself and how desperately I had once wanted a child of my own.

However, Sophia always said, “Leonard, look at where we are right now. We’re drowning in debt. How could we possibly afford to raise a child? Let’s wait until things get better.”

I believed her. I thought she only wanted to protect the little family we were supposed to build together.

So it was not that she did not want a child. She simply did not want one with me.

The regular at the next table chimed in again and teased Austin. “You should count your blessings, man. Sophia spoils you rotten. Just look at that soft, pampered face of yours. When was the last time she let you lift a finger for any of the heavy work around here?”

“You bet she does. My wife can’t live without me. She’s always saying she doesn’t know what she’d do if I weren’t around,” Austin replied as he lifted his chin smugly.

‘Can’t live without him?’

My mind flashed back to the construction sites overseas.

To earn every last dollar I could, I spent 16 hours a day hauling bags of cement. The skin on my shoulders had been rubbed raw until the flesh was exposed. Sweat seeped into the open wounds, and each drop burned like fire.

Once, I went 3 days and 3 nights without sleep. I nearly fell off the scaffolding from sheer exhaustion.

The contrast felt so cruel that it seemed as though an invisible hand twisted a knife in my chest.

What had I sacrificed my life for over those past 5 years?

I abandoned my home and everything familiar to provide for her. Meanwhile, back home, she used my money to support another man and his child, and now she expected their second.

It felt ridiculous. It all felt so ridiculous.

Five years ago, on the morning I left for the airport, Sophia clung to me and sobbed so hard she could barely catch her breath.

“Leonard, you have to come home soon. I’m scared of being here all by myself. Don’t worry about the debts. I’ll take care of things at home. Just look after yourself.”

I wondered if those tears had been real.

“Hey, have some water. You don’t look too good. Are you feeling worn out?”

Austin’s voice pulled me out of my thoughts. He held out a glass of water with an easy, welcoming smile.

I took it mechanically, yet I did not drink.

My gaze drifted past him to the center of the wall behind the cash register.

A large framed family portrait hung there. In the photograph, Sophia wore a gentle smile. Austin held Zach in his arms, and his face glowed with happiness.

The three of them nestled close together and looked like a perfect family.

That was a family. I wondered what I was.

A bitter, metallic taste rose in my throat as my stomach churned. The truth was, I had been a fool all along.