FOUR

ARIA

The night air hit me and I stood there for exactly two seconds, just breathing, just trying to get my

heartbeat to slow down enough to think.

Why is he here?

What is he doing?

Of all the human cities to come to, why this one? And why the restaurant? Six years of nothing and then he walks into the back room of the place I work like it’s nothing. Like the universe has a very specific and very cruel sense of humor. And his face.

I hadn’t wanted to see that, I hadn’t wanted to stand close enough to watch something move through his eyes, hurt and fury and something else underneath both of them that I couldn’t name and didn’t want to.

I shook my head and started walking, it didn’t matter, none of it mattered, what mattered was Eli. Getting to Eli, running and leaving before Adrian started searching.

Because I know him, now that he knows I’m alive, he’ll find me. And he’ll find Eli. And the last thing I wanted was for him to find my son.

I pulled out my phone quickly.

Abby picked up on the second ring. “Hey, you still at work? I was just about to—”

“I need help.” My voice came out steadier than I felt. “I’m in trouble, Abs. Real trouble.”

A pause. “What kind of trouble? Are you okay?”

“I can’t explain everything right now.” I turned a corner, moving fast, watching the street behind me out of habit. “I need to leave. Tonight. Me and Eli, we need to get out of the city and I don’t have enough in my account for two tickets.”

“Maya—”

“A thousand dollars. Can you lend me a thousand? I’ll pay you back, I swear, I’ll pay back every cent, I just need—”

“Hey.” Her voice was firm and warm at the same time. That was Abby. All edges until you needed her, then nothing but solid ground. “Stop. I’ve got it. Okay? I’ve got it.”

I exhaled. “Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet, where are you trying to go?”

“Anywhere. Another state. Somewhere with a decent hospital for Eli.” I pressed my fingers to my eyes for a second. “I don’t care where, Abs. Just far.”

“Okay.” I could hear her already moving around, keys jingling, the sound of her grabbing things. “I’ll book the tickets right now and then come pick you up. Where are you?”

“I’m heading to the hospital first. I have to get Eli.”

“I’ll meet you there. Twenty minutes.” A beat. “And Maya? Whatever this is, you’re going to be okay. You hear me?”

I didn’t answer that. I just said thank you again and hung up and walked faster.

The hospital corridor smelled the way it always did.

Antiseptic and something underneath it that I had no name for, the particular smell of a place where people were waiting for news. I knew it too well by now. I’d spent enough nights in it.

Eli’s room was at the end of the third floor.

He was asleep when I got there, small under the white blanket, one hand curled loosely by his face. The monitor beside him beeped in steady rhythm. He looked so young. He always looked so young like this, all the bravery packed away for the night, just a little boy sleeping.

The nurse on duty was up before I’d taken two steps inside.

“Ms. Hatt, visiting hours are—”

“I need to take him.” I was already at his bedside. “I need to discharge him tonight.”

“That’s not possible, his levels this morning were—”

“I understand that.” I turned to face her, keeping my voice low and even. “And I’m not asking you to tell me it’s a good idea. I’m asking you to start the paperwork.”

She looked at me for a long moment. Then she left to get the doctor, which I expected, and the doctor came in and told me everything I already knew about Eli’s condition and the risks of disrupting his treatment schedule, and I listened to all of it and then I signed the forms anyway.

I sat on the edge of the bed and put my hand on Eli’s shoulder. “Hey, bug.”

His eyes opened slowly. Heavy with sleep. He looked at me and then around the room, confused. “Mommy?”

“Hi, baby.”

“What’s happening?” He pushed himself up onto one elbow, blinking.

I smoothed his hair back from his forehead. My chest was doing something I couldn’t afford to let it do right now. “We’re going on a trip.”

He stared at me. “Now?”

“Right now.” I reached for his shoes on the chair beside the bed. “You’ve always wanted a vacation, haven’t you? You told me in the summer. You said you wanted to go somewhere with a pool.”

Something shifted in his face. The confusion was still there but underneath it, slowly, something that looked almost like excitement. “A real vacation?”

“A real one.” I helped him sit up properly and started putting his shoes on, my hands moving automatically. “So we have to go now, before the good rooms get taken.”

He thought about this seriously for a moment, the way he thought about everything. Then he nodded, satisfied, and let me bundle him into his jacket. My phone buzzed.

We’re outside. Come down. — Abs

I picked Eli up, settled him against my hip, grabbed the bag from the chair. He was heavier than he used to be. Or maybe I was just tired.

“Abby’s here,” I told him.

His face lit up. “Abby’s coming on vacation?”

“She’s dropping us off.” I kissed the side of his head and carried him out into the corridor, away from the beeping monitor and the white walls and the smell of waiting. “Come on.”

Abby was parked outside the main entrance, hazards blinking. She got out the moment she saw us and crossed the pavement fast, pulling me into a one-armed hug, careful of Eli between us.

“You okay?” she said quietly, against my ear.

“I will be” She pulled back and looked at Eli, her expression softening immediately. “Hey, little man.”

“We’re going on vacation,” he told her seriously.

“I heard.” She smiled at him, then looked at me, something cautious in her eyes. “Get in. I’ll explain the tickets on the way.”

I walked around to the other side of the car and that’s when I saw him, in the driver’s seat.

Marcus—Abby’s boyfriend who has been hitting on me for the past couple of years to the point where I try not to be in the same room with him.

I looked at Abby over the roof of the car.

“Why is he here?”

“I needed someone to drive. My car is at the shop.” She wasn’t meeting my eyes. “It’s fine, Maya. Get in.”

I stood there for a second. Eli was heavy on my hip and Adrian was somewhere behind me and I had sixty dollars in my account and two hundred in my bag and with nowhere else to go, I got in.

Marcus didn’t say anything when I settled into the backseat with Eli on my lap. Just watched me in the rearview mirror with that smile, slow and unbothered, like he had nowhere to be and all the time in the world to get there. I pulled Eli closer and looked out the window and told myself I was being paranoid.

The streets passed. The city lights thinned.

Abby hadn’t said anything about the tickets, hadn’t pulled out her phone, hadn’t mentioned a destination or an airline or anything at all. She was sitting very still in the passenger seat with her hands folded in her lap and her eyes forward.

“Abby.” I kept my voice light, for Eli. “Where are we headed?”

“Not far,” she said. “Just a quick stop first.”

“What kind of stop?” She didn’t answer.

Marcus turned off the main road.

The streets got darker. Quieter. The kind of quiet that collects in places people don’t go after dark. No streetlights, no other cars, just the beam of the headlights cutting through nothing.

My arms tightened around Eli.

“Marcus.” I said it flatly. “Where are you going?”

He didn’t answer either. Just made another turn and pulled up in front of a lot, empty and dark, bordered by a chain-link fence and nothing else, and cut the engine.

Silence.

Then he turned around in his seat to look at me properly for the first time since I’d gotten in. The smile was still there. Wider now.

“You know,” he said, “I’ve been patient. Really patient. Six years of watching you walk in and out of that apartment, acting like you’re too good for me” He tilted his head slightly and met my eyes through the rear view mirror.

“I think that deserves something in return, considering the fact that I'm doing you a favor, don't you?” Everything in me went cold.

“Abby.” My voice came out very quiet. “What is this?”

Abby opened her door and got out. She stood beside the car and when she turned to look at me through the glass her face was crumpled, guilty, miserable, all of it at once.

“I’m sorry,” she said. Her voice was barely anything. “Maya, I’m so sorry. He was there when you called. He heard everything and he said if I didn’t—” she stopped, pressed her hand to her mouth for a second.

“It’ll be quick. He just wants one night and then he’ll drive you both to the airport himself. I made him promise.” I stared at her, the betrayal and confusion hitting me at once

One night? What was I? A whore?

“Abby—”

“I’m sorry.” She said it again, like repetition would make it mean something different.

Marcus was getting out of the car now, unhurried, rolling his sleeves up like he was settling in for something. He came around to my door and opened it and leaned against the frame, looking down at me with that smile that made my skin crawl.

“It’s really simple,” he said. “You come with me for a little while, your kid stays with Abby, nobody gets hurt, everybody goes home.” He shrugged.

“Let me have a taste of whatever you’ve been keeping from me for so long” I tried not to linger on the vulgar way he was clutching his bulging crotch

“Mommy.”

Eli’s voice. Small and confused against my neck.

I pulled him tighter. My heart was slamming so hard I could feel it in my teeth.

“What’s happening?” he asked.

Abby reached into the backseat then, hands out, reaching for Eli, and I twisted away from her automatically.

“Don’t touch him,” I said.

“Maya, please, just let me take him so he doesn’t have to—”

“Don’t.” I looked at her over his head, this woman I’d lived with for six years, shared a kitchen with, cried in front of, trusted with the only thing in the world that mattered to me. “Don’t you dare touch my son.” Marcus straightened up and took a step closer and his shadow fell over both of us.