77

“Fuck…” I dropped my head onto the table, deliberately wanting to hurt myself a little. Though the physical pain is nothing compared to what’s going on inside.

“You’re too hard on yourself and on me,” I heard Nazar say as he moved closer, taking Luka’s seat. “We could’ve had a good time. My brother and Vicky are great people, and you already know the kids. I would’ve figured something out, or told the truth. They’re used to my… unconventional behavior. Nothing surprises them anymore.”

“You’re really not helping right now,” I muttered without lifting my head. “‘Used to it.’ And you’re here trying to prove something serious to me? Even your own family knows you’re unpredictable. Clearly not the first time,” I lifted my head and looked into his green eyes. “You want me as your wife. Let’s ASSUME I became one. Then what? I just sit and wait for the next thing you pull? Like sitting on a powder keg.”

“I’m different with you,” the man touched my face and smiled softly. “And you can pull just as much crazy shit as I can. I’m the one who’ll always be on edge with you.”

“Oh, whatever,” I sighed, not wanting to start another argument about who’s worse. “I need to talk to them.”

I stood up and tried to walk past Yartsev toward the kids’ room. But as I passed him, I got a light slap on the ass and saw his satisfied grin.

Rolling my eyes and clicking my tongue irritably, I went into the kids’ bedroom.

Masha was lying on the bed staring out the window, and Luka was playing with his toy cars, quietly making buzzing sounds.

“Hey,” I sat on the edge of the bed. “I’m sorry. I blurted that out… without thinking,” I said guiltily, stroking her arm.

“You didn’t say anything wrong,” the blonde sighed, closing her eyes tiredly. Honestly, she looked pale and sleepy.

“Yeah, but it sounded shitty even to me. Maybe we should go to the movies? What do you think?” I tried to sound more upbeat and saw Luka look at us with interest.

“Anya, thanks, but I’m tired,” Masha looked exhausted. “I just want to lie down. But you can take Luka and go somewhere.”

“No. We’re not leaving you,” I said firmly. “Either together or no one. If you want, we can watch a movie in the living room?”

Masha looked at me for a few seconds, thinking, and eventually agreed to one movie. After that, she went to bed. We shopped for hours today, and it hit the kids hard.

But even though his sister went to rest, Luka was full of energy, and we managed to watch a cartoon with him too.

That night I slept badly.

Even though I pushed Nazar away when he tried something earlier, he held me tightly against his tattooed chest. Thoughts rushed chaotically through my head, nothing I could grab onto, but enough to keep sleep away like a damn broom. There was anxiety inside, a mess that didn’t leave until almost dawn.

And even though I barely slept, I woke up early.

After tossing and turning for a bit, I heard Yartsev mumble in his sleep and decided not to disturb the handsome bastard.

Some instinct pulled me toward the kids’ bedroom. I wanted to look at them, to admire them while they slept peacefully and find some kind of calm.

They’re wonderful kids.

Even growing up in such horrible conditions, they’re not problematic at home. Though… we’ll see what school brings.

I opened the door to the temporary kids’ room and looked toward the bed.

Luka was sleeping peacefully, arms thrown behind his head, but Masha wasn’t there.

That discovery, especially so early in the morning, made me uneasy.

I quietly walked into the room and saw the bathroom door slightly open.

I was about to approach and quietly call Masha… when I noticed several drops of blood on the floor in front of the door.