How Could She Be?

If I push him down the stairs, what will happen?

Is it possible for me to divorce him?

Could I go to jail?

If I go to jail, will the stress I feel disappear quickly?

Drrttt!

My cell phone rang.

Eve!

I called her name in my heart. Eve. She was the lover of the man I married.

“What else? Why are you walking so slowly? Get a move on!” he barked.

He was Bima. He scolded me as usual.

He was the man I married because of a certain incident. He hated me too, probably down to the bottom of his heart.

Yet at this time, both of his legs were paralyzed because of an accident.

“Eve called me,” I said.

“W–what?” Bima looked shocked.

“Your lover called me, so wait a minute. I’ll pick it up!” I said it furiously.

“Let me hear your conversation with her!” He asked, his facial expression still the same as always.

The look of disappointment on his face was because his lover left him, and because he had to marry me as well.

I smiled faintly. Actually, it hurt to be ordered around from every direction.

The man who married me ordered me to be his maid. His lover ordered me to make him remember her, always. Then my mother-in-law ordered me to take good care of her son. And at least my mother too, she pushed me to be a good wife to my husband’s family for the sake of my father’s business.

None of them seemed to have any empathy for me.

It was like being a slave, or a fool who had many masters to serve.

What a shitty life this was!

“Huh… what?” I asked Eve.

I answered Eva’s call. She was the lover of the man I had been married to for two years.

Anyway, I didn’t think of him as a husband at all. During our marriage, he always treated me like a maid. I had never been considered a wife, the way people normally were.

“How has he been, dear?” Eve asked me.

I smiled, knowing for sure she was asking about Bima’s condition.

“Why don’t you just ask him directly instead of me?” I answered her. As usual, my tone sounded curt, because I had to.

“You yourself know that he is currently losing his memory, right?”

Fools. I wondered how long all of you would pretend not to know.

“He never loses his memory. I’ve told you many times that he doesn’t lose his memory. Why don’t you just confirm it yourself by contacting him directly, huh? Why does it always have to go through me? Eve, I’m tired of it.”

I was still trying to control my emotions while facing Eve, who always controlled me and asked about Bima’s condition. It turned my stomach, making me sick of it.

Once again, all of this was maintained for the sake of my devotion to my mother. She really loved my father, even though her body and soul had been completely destroyed.

“Rima, think about your mother!” Eve treated me like this all the time.

“So you are threatening me?” I asked furiously.

“When the time comes, I will definitely contact Bima again, but now is not the time.”

I couldn’t stand listening to Eva’s excuses any longer, so I hurriedly ended the call.

I turned slightly toward Bima, who was sitting in a wheelchair. Bima’s eyes were red from holding back his anger.

He must have been disappointed because the lover he loved so much never wanted to meet him.

“Your voice is too loud. If Mommy hears it, I will ruin your life!”

Not only Eva, but Bima was also threatening me now. They were as selfish as they wanted to be.

I immediately pushed the wheelchair that Bima was using.

Yup, the man I married was paralyzed in both legs after an accident. As a result, his marriage to Eva was canceled, and he was forced to marry me so that his mother would not be sad and suffer.

There was a certain reason why I agreed to marry a rude man who always thought of me as his maid. This rude man also always pretended to have lost his memory in front of his own mother, and he thought of me as Eve, his lover.

For him, I was Eve. He married Eve, not me. His wife was Eve. He would say to everyone that my name was Eve.

I was really going crazy because of him.

Even though he stated that I was Eve, that didn’t mean he considered me equal to Eva. He didn’t want to love me. He didn’t want to consider me his wife, and he didn’t want to be good to me.

He only thought of me as Eva’s substitute.

“Oh my dear!” The sound of a woman’s voice came from the main door of the house.

“Has Mother come?”

I pushed Bima’s special wheelchair down the stairs slowly, ahead of his mother’s position.

Well, should I just push Bima down so that my life could be free from this torture and pain?

_Just push him down… just push him down, just let him die!_ That was what I desired.

I didn’t know why my little heart whispered such things.

“Aahhhh… ahhh… ahhh!”

I was shocked when I heard Bima scream out. His parents rushed to run up the stairs.

“Bima… Bima… what’s wrong with you, darling?”

My mother-in-law came to hug Bima, who was moaning in pain in the middle of the stairs, while I stood with eyes full of satisfaction, even though it wasn’t actually me who caused Bima to scream in pain.

“My leg… get my medicine, Eve!” Bima shouted at me, saying Eve’s name, because that was how he usually called my name in front of his parents.

A little satisfaction filled my heart, seeing him in pain, so I lazily walked toward his room to get the medicine.

“Get it fast, Eva!” My mother-in-law shouted at me.

Whatever. I let her yell and kept walking lazily.

I still really wanted to enjoy the screams of pain from the man who was always rude to me.

***_

“Get the medicine, get it for me!”

After his parents were told to go home, Bima was finally free to shout at me as he pleased.

He threw the medicine bottle until it hit my head. Though it was just a plastic bottle, his behavior still hurt my self-esteem.

“Eve said the medicine will arrive soon,” I said.

I picked up the bottle that Bima had thrown on the floor and put it on the table.

“Where is the courier? Quickly ask Eve and pick up the medicine!”

Bima never stopped shouting at me, even though he was groaning in pain.

_Feel it!_ That was what I said to him, then I rushed out of his room.

“Hurry up, you fool, damn woman!”

That son of a bitch would never stop cursing me.

Just keep cursing me. I didn’t care anyway.

I had been married for two years with nothing but insults, and my heart was numb.

“Eve, send me the courier number!” I asked Eve when she answered my call. “Bima is in pain!”

“Get it fast, you bitch!!”

I let Eva hear Bima curse at me so that she would be satisfied.

Well, that was proof to Eve that I had succeeded in making Bima always remember her and not love me.

“How does it feel to be insulted?”

Damn woman, Eve looked happy hearing Bima curse at me.

“Just send the courier number!”

_**_

For some reason, I didn’t want to speed up the car I was driving after I met the courier at the crossroads.

I wanted Bima to keep screaming in pain. Let him feel that pain until he died, maybe.

However, if he died, my mother would probably suffer even more, and I wouldn’t be able to bear seeing my mother’s death.

My mother was stubborn and impossible to convince. She was a person who always felt that her actions were the most correct. She was very selfish, sacrificing her own child to get what she wanted in life.

Drttt!

Drttt!

Dozens of missed calls from Bima. I knew that if I picked up, he would definitely curse at me again and again.

Sriitr!

Brukkk!

Ugghhh!

“What’s this?” I shouted in anger.

I held my head, and I saw blood flowing from it.

“Sorry… sorry, I accidentally bumped into you!”

Knock… knock… knock…

Damn, I felt dizzy when I heard the sound of knocking on the car window, but I still opened it.

Then I ended up unconscious.

“Sis… Sis… wake up!” I didn’t know who shook my body, but never mind. I just wanted to sleep for a long time after feeling tired of taking care of that man’s illness for so long.

_***

Ahhh…

My heart felt very calm, even though my head hurt. Maybe it was because I hadn’t slept this well for a long time.

I slowly opened my eyes, then took a deep breath.

That’s right, I remembered. I had an accident on my way home to pick up Bima’s medicine.

How would Bima’s condition be without medicine? Was he dead?

I chuckled softly, a faint smile on my lips, even though I knew that in the future my life might be much more difficult.

“Now that you’re awake, let’s go to the police station!”

“What?”

I was shocked to death when I heard the voice of someone I didn’t recognize.

I turned my head and looked at him.

He was a man wearing a white coat and glasses.

His face was bright, and his body was tall and sturdy. He was handsome, very handsome.

“What is this? I was the one who was hit, so why should I be the one taken to the police station?” I asked him.

My eyes watered, and I shouted angrily at him.

I didn’t care about the pain in my head. I sat still and glared at him very angrily.

“You are carrying illegal drugs. These drugs cannot be carried by just anyone.”

This man was a doctor. He showed me the medicine I had received from Eva.

I checked the medicine again.

That’s right, that medicine was definitely the medicine Bima had been taking for his whole life.

“What’s illegal? That’s medicine to treat my husband’s paralyzed legs, right? The medicine comes from abroad, and my husband often takes it.” I was angry with him.

“Treating paralysis?!” The doctor smiled bitterly. “It’s the opposite.”

“What?”

“People who consume it can actually become permanently paralyzed.”

My mouth fell open, and my heart was beating fast, because I never thought Eve’s intention was to give medicine to the man who really loved her.

“Let’s go to the police station!”

“L–let me explain to you. Please give me a chance to explain!” I asked, struggling.

How could Eve do this to Bima?