Diary of a Stalker

Inhaling deeply as you walked by, your cologne was enough to set me off. If I could touch myself right now, I would, but II know every single detail about your life, where you work, all your friends, where you love to hang out, why you moved out of your parents house. How to kill your partner. have to remain in control. I stopped my breath to not gasp, just your very presence set my soul on fire. 

You could set me on fire all you want, I wouldn't mind all because it's you. The person of my dreams, that is now in my reality.

Your cologne has me all choked up, Gucci Guilt, that's what it's called. My new favourite scent, I'm mad that our men had to wear it as well, but either way. You wore it better, with a mixture of spices and after shave. Your scent, it's enough to get me drunk. I closed my eyes, begging it to linger. To take me away like I saw in those cartoons, to beckon me forward with a finger.

I opened my mouth to taste it, to taste you as you walked by again. I couldn't help the gasp that escaped my lips this time. You have such a hold, maybe a control over me. I don't know what it is, but I want all of it.

But instead I got the pleasure of your coat tail brushing against mine. My heart skipped a beat. Such contact, even in the slightest, almost set me off. My knees even went weak for a split second. I might need to even change my underwear.

'Fu*k.'

You don't even know the effect you have on me. Your very being has clouded my mind. I can hardly think with you this close to me. 

I lost myself in another daydream. This time we are on a picnic, laying beside each other, sipping wine and eating grapes. The sky was clear just for us; the birds were out singing lovely tunes and everything was perfect.

You are my everything, my entire life.

"Sweet Soy latte, extra cream, and a shot of whiskey!" The girl at the counter called, pulling me out of my fantasy. I glared at her for ruining something so precious to us, if only she knew.

I moved forward for my coffee, eager to leave the cafe, eager to catch up with you. To follow behind you, without your slightest knowledge. For it was all I could do, watch you from a distance. Day dream about us, and hope that you will turn around.

"Sweet soy..." I grabbed the coffee before she could call the order again. Stupid girl, don't you know that I have to saviour this moment, that I have to do all that I can to spend every extra time with my man.

"Thanks." My voice came out softly. A voice I have been practicing to use just for you. I know men loved soft spoken women, so I'll do my best to charm you with my voice.

I took a sip from my coffee and sighed, yes that's how I drink my coffee. I never used to drink it before. I find it to be too bitter. No amount of sugar or milk could kill the nasty burnt taste.

I never understood the craze for it, but Russell, you loved your morning, afternoon, and evening coffee. Even a small cup before bed. I don't understand how you can drink this thing so much.

'Addicted maybe?'

But I do know that you love Cafè Misto very much, or sometimes you would take a Blonde Cappuccino. You really like that too. I felt your pain when they had neither today and you had to settle for just a regular espresso. I hate that, if it was I. I would have made sure that I'm never out of what you love.

I grimaced at the bitter taste. I only tried coffee, just for you.

Might as well, you love it. So why can't I?

Even though mine might not be as strong as yours, and I prefer to mix mine with alcohol.

I hurried out of the shop, looking left then right. You were taking a different route to work today, and with the crowds of people, I almost lost you. As I pushed my way through the twang of rushing sweaty sheep, some of my coffee spilled on a woman's crisp white top.

Both of us glanced back at each other at the same time, but me with a smile, 'should have watched where you were going.' I mouthed to her. She spun back around and continued on. Good for her.

Again, I almost lost you, but I knew your red, blue and yellow scarf anywhere, and your scent was something I could pick up from a mile away.

You laughed with his friends, which was music to my ears, and your voice was the poem of my soul.

Olivia can't even begin to phantom the wonderful, heaven-sent man she has.

You're so put together, a god amongst men.

Multi-talented, successful, and smart.

She doesn't deserve you.

But I do, I was made for you. I just need to build up the nerve to say....'hi'.

To tell you how much I love you.

I know our babies would be the best, have the best.

'Our beautiful babies.' Yes, that has a nice ring to it.

I smiled at the thought, sipping away on my coffee.

I wishing I was the one to walking with you, but I know that can happen soon.

Will happen soon.

You kissed your girlfriend goodbye and watched as she crossed the road.

I wish a truck would send her flying.

But that would be too much on you.

But I'm here for you, forever and always.

You are mine, and I am yours.

From the first day we met.

We work in the same company, I was a receptionist until I got promoted me to personal assistant.

You, Russell Clinton, the new H.R Manager, you addressed to me, and I passed the word unto our boss.

That's when I knew I was in love. Your smile, your walk, the way your dark hair fell into your brown eyes.

The way you would brush it away, how you had regretted that time you got a haircut and dyed it blonde.

I knew the universe was on my side, my dream job, and then you.

You and I were meant to be.

I will have it all.

But I have to wait.

Not for you and that wretched fake bitch to break up.

No, but just wait.