LOGINVedant She’s not there when I return.A part of me had hoped against the odds that Chiara would still be there when I got back despite the late hour. But of course she’s not. She has a life outside of me.But what’s still there—and might be of some comfort to me—is my father’s liquor cabinet.Well,
Vedant I can’t believe that I’m back here already. Just hours ago, I had been here with Chiara. And in my mind, Iris had been alive.So much has changed, but I’m right back where I started the day. This time, though, I ask for where my father is when I arrive at the front desk.The nurse directs me
“Chiara,” I say. “Are you ok? Do you need something?”She shakes her head. “No. I’m fine.”But the truth is plainly different. She is burdened by something I can’t place.“Is there anything I can do? I know you must still be hurting–”“It’s not that,” she says, cutting me off.I blink. “Then what is
Chiara Vedant’s shoulders are slumped when he opens the door. His eyes are shadowed and unfocused, like he’s been drinking. It’s strange to see him like this when he’s always been so controlled and steady.But now he looks like something inside him has collapsed.I straighten at the sight of him, w
Vedant I go to the one place I know I still can return. Home. Even though I know my laptop is waiting for me there, devoid of any new messages from Iris. Because there will never be any new messages from her. Not anymore.Iris is dead.My chest still feels like it’s been cracked open, like someone
Vedant “What’s wrong?” Chiara’s worry is potent, and I feel immediately bad for causing her any additional harm while she’s recovering.“I, um…” I struggle to find the words. Are there even words to describe this? “I have to go.”I know I’m being abrupt, but I can’t have her see me like this. It’s
Vedant It was not lost on me that the trip was supposed to be a reward. A time for celebration.Instead, it’s an exercise in restraint.Every moment that I am in Chiara’s presence, I wonder if this was the time I will ask her. So many times it was on the tip of my tongue. Are you Iris? But then I
Vedant I am walking through the hospital doors when the pain jolts through me.It lances me, momentarily making me nearly bend double. It comes seemingly from nowhere, piercing through my bones and taking me by surprise. I have no idea what might have caused it, and it takes me a moment to compartm
Vedant I wake with a stiff neck to my phone buzzing.It takes a moment for my surroundings to clarify. I’m lying back on a chair with a throw pillow behind my head. The morning light is streaming through the cracks in the blinds.And Chiara is across the room, lying in the bed we were meant to be s
I tell myself that I should confront her. It’s the same argument I’ve had for days at this point. But before I can decide, Alice drifts toward me, all perfume and thick makeup.“Fancy seeing you here,” she says softly, touching my arm. “What’s wrong, Vedant? You look tense. Is it because of the room







