PROLOGUE

“No!” I scream as I hear another bang. 

I can’t see what is happening but I know that my dad is back from his drinking spree.

I hear a groan and shut my eyes trying not to think about what is happening.

That’s my mum and I know she has been hit by my drunk dad. It’s the life I have to live each and every day. 

The life of poverty, an unstable family, a drunkard for a father, an abusive father; it’s just a family full of domestic violence.

“Stop it Joe.” My mum screams in pain making me spring out of the cupboard to go and rescue her. This is where I hide every time he gets home drunk. I am scared of him.

“Stop dad.” I beg trying to pull him off my mother but he grabs me and hurls me across the small room making me scream in pain.

“Are you okay Isa?” mum is already on my side pulling me to her.

“He hurt me.” I say amidst sobs.

“You hurt our daughter Joe.” She says softly, careful not to sound reprimanding. She knows what is going to happen if she chooses to go that direction.

“Your stupid daughter shouldn’t have gotten in my way!” he shouts, his voice booming in the small room.

I hate this man. He is my father but this is what we have to put up with everyday. He is a monster.

A monster who doesn’t care whether his family has had anything to eat. All he does is drink drink and drink. That is his hobby. 

“But…”

“It’s okay mum.” I groan interrupting her. I don’t want her to get hurt anymore so I just bury my face in her chest and sob uncontrollably.

“I can’t stay here and hear her stupid sobbing! I’m leaving.” He declares and staggers to the falling door. It creaks open and he bangs it behind him making me think it’s going to fall anytime.

This is not the life I signed up for. I hate my life but I can’t do anything about it.

Okay. Here is my story.

I’m Isa. Six-years old and I don’t know the meaning of a classroom because I have never been in one. My parents can’t afford school fees. That’s because all the money they make goes to my father’s alcohol.

I come from a family of four but not anymore. My brother Jim, ran away from home because he couldn’t put up with an unstable family. We have never set eyes on him since then but we know he is somewhere in the streets.

I don’t want to imagine what he goes through trying to look for food and shelter but is there much difference with this place?

No. It’s not different. We sometimes go without any meal. Our house is going to collapse anytime so the street life is better but I can’t leave mum here with this monster. I can’t help much but she needs my company and someone to comfort her.

See?

That leaves me with a family of three. I consider it a family of two because dad is barely at home.

I have lost count of how many times he has tried to force himself on me and mum got in the way. In all these times, she signs up for more marks on her body.

I at times want to tell her we should leave but to where? We don’t have a place to go so we just have to put up with Joe. He doesn’t deserve to be called dad.

“It’s okay baby.” Mum caresses my long, unkempt hair snapping me to the present.

“I hate him.”

“Hush! Don’t say that. You are a little girl and he will change. Don’t worry baby. This is going to pass soon.” She continues stroking my hair.

“Till when mum? He always comes back drunk and abusive.”

“Just give him time. He will change.”

“I don’t think so. It’s too late. Jim is nowhere to be seen and it’s because of him.”

“We will find him soon. Come. Let’s go to bed.”

“I’m hungry momma.” I rub my stomach.

“We don’t have food baby. Just sleep let me go out and get something to eat.”

“It’s okay. You can’t go out. It’s dark. I can survive until morning.” I wipe my tears and stand up. She takes my hand and leads me to the small bed. It creaks when I lie on it but I’m used to this and it’s no big deal.

“Goodnight baby.” She pulls the dirty, old quilt over my body and plants a kiss on my forehead.

********

“Momma!” I scurry out of the bed and run towards the direction of the screams. 

“Momma.” I call my eyes taking in the scene before me. 

Mum lies on the cold floor with a knife in her chest. She is groaning in pain, looking at me with eyes full of pity. Blood is pooling around her.

“Mum.” I throw myself at her.

“Go to bed Isa.” Dad orders but I don’t give in to his demand.

“You hurt mum.” I say hugging mum tightly. I’m helpless. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to save her. 

“Isa.” Mum calls weakly.

“Mum.” I answer and feel tears piercing my eyes.

“Take care of yourself. You can do this.” She says amidst groans.

“Don’t leave me momma.” I beg in tears.

“It’s too late baby. Run away from this before he does this to you too.”

“Dad stabbed you?”

“Yes. Go away. Look for help and don’t come back to him. Look for Jim and tell him I love him so much.”

“No momma.”

“Just go Isa.” She begs one last time and shuts her eyes.

“Momma.”

No response.

“Momma.” I call shaking her but she doesn’t respond.

When I look around, the monster is nowhere to be seen.

“Help!!!” I shout running out of our small house.

“Help!!!” I shout again. I’m now hysterical. I don’t want to lose mum. Not now. Now when I’m this young and don’t have anywhere to go.

“Isa.” Hellen runs to the house and screams too.

“What is it?” I don’t know who asks that  because my vision becomes blurred as the whole world crumbles down on me.