HAPPY BIRTHDAY

  Today decides my fate.

At the end of today-in a few hours, I would either be my father’s pride, or the stain he’d continue to keep hiding.

My world changes today.

  The day of my eighteenth birthday.

“Come on now, it’s not too late, they say the best part of the day is the night.” I murmur to myself, wearing the rug thin with all my pacing.

 “Yes, what are the chances that I would meet my mate and finally, finally, shift tonight?” I respond out loud.

 My hands fly to my face and I drag it down.

The sound of music coming from the ball room downstairs reminds me of my father’s words.

 “This is your last chance. You’ll sit at my right hand and I will announce you to the people tonight, once you find your mate. Or else, your sister will take your spot as the alpha of Crescent Moon.”

 A cold shiver runs down my spine.

Being the next alpha after my father is all I have lived for. I lived and breathed alpha training, and now there’s a chance that it’ll slip from my grasp…

 “Eddie! Why are you celebrating your eighteenth in the same place you spend every other second of your life, up in your room?” Holly, my best and only friend, says walking into my room.

She is not allowed to do that, but she has done this since we were still in diapers, the guards don’t even bother stopping her anymore.

 The tightness in my chest gives a little at the sight of her.

She is wearing pants, instead of the stipulated ball dress for the party. Holly only ever cared for rules to break them.

 “Holls, where’s Stephen?” I ask, glancing behind her for her mate.

They were usually inseparable.

  At first it was grating.

Every were person found their mate on their sixteenth birthday, her birthday came first, and she didn’t find him.

I hoped it would be me, since my own birthday was forth coming. Not because I liked her romantically, but because I didn’t want to disappoint my father who already started calling her the next Luna of the Crescent Moon pack.

 It drove nails up my head when she found Stephen.

I begged her not to say anything around my father, just until I found mine. She accepted, but the thing about finding your mate is the fact that you can’t hide it.

 Holls became soft around the edges, and soon everyone knew the girl who used to jump in trees for fun had found her mate.

 I would never forget the look on my father’s face the day he found out.

Disgust.

 Oh, and the fact that my wolf is almost silent, or nonexistent.

I rub my face again, harder this time.

 God. I really wish the moon goddess would spare me.

One or the other.

A mate or my wolf.

 Actually I need the two, but I can’t be picky right now.

“He said I should come speak with you.”

She sits on the edge of my bed, eyes tracking my movements.

“You’re not okay.”

“Everyone from the pack is there right now, waiting for the heir.”

“Not everyone.”

I give her a look and she flashes me a grin, her chipped tooth winking at me. Any other day I would find that comforting but not today.

 Since mom passed, dad has never looked at me as a family…

If only I wasn’t so defective.

 “Hey, you’ll find them. The moon goddess for reasons best known to her, made us in pairs, do you think she’d leave you unpaired? Just you? That would mean you’re some hot shit, not a loser trapped in his tower.”

 That manages to get a small smile out of me.

Holls may be very crude and creative with her insults, but she doesn’t tell a lie.

I finally collapse on the bed, rumpling the suit my father’s tailor hand sewn especially for this occasion. It is a really ugly red suit, but try telling the alpha that he has no taste in fashion and end up like Tongueless; his personal tailor, who got his name from being tongueless.

 With a sigh, I raise my hand in front of me, the old architecture, the head of a wolf, and a crescent moon behind it, our pack’s symbol, it’s on everything.

Some times I feel like it’s haunting me for not being enough.

 “I really hope I find her today.”

So my father can tell the pack that his first Luna actually gave him a son, his first child, so he can be proud of me.

 “You will. I wasn’t looking for Stephen when I found him, and here we are.” she says with a flourish.

I roll on my side, as far as the suit would let me.

“Tell me again exactly how I would know when I see the woman I would spend the rest of my life with?”

 She groans but she loves talking about the force that pulls you in your mate’s direction.

“It’s a magnetic force really. Like a part of two souls recognizing each other, singing a chorus only your soul knows…”

 She has a far away look in her black eyes, so I know she’s thinking of Stephen.

I try to picture it.

 Me and her, whoever she may be, whatever she may be doing now, our souls singing the song only known by our souls.

 My father acknowledging me, finally.

Somehow, my heart yearns more for the second half, and I have a harder time imagining the first.

Maybe because I have no idea what she looks like yet.

 “Either way, you won’t find her being cooped up in your room. Come, let’s go back downstairs.”

 That much was true, no one ever found their mate sulking.

My eyes fall on the grand clock hanging on the stone wall of my room.

 Few minutes to midnight.

Shit.

 Shutting my eyes, I try not to focus on the queasiness of my stomach, or the weight of what happens if I don’t find my mate after tonight…

 Think good thoughts, Eddie.

“I still think your father is too much, throwing a party for your birthday when people don’t know what you look like. Making you a guest at your own party.” she sulks.

 I prefer this way, sneaking out of my own party would have been a hassle, but sneaking out of a party where only a handful of people knew my identity was easy.

 “Go ahead without me, I will be there in a second.”

She eyes me.

“Are you sure you’ll be fine? I can wait.”

I give her what I hope is a reassuring smile, from her expression, it isn’t working.

“I need a few minutes to gather myself, I will be right down with you.”

She exhales, getting to her feet.

 “Alright, Stephen and I will be waiting for you.”

I nod and watch as she walks out.

 As soon as she leaves I take gulps of air, trying to get as much oxygen to my brain as possible, so I stop the impending panic attack.

 There’s no enough air in the room. I don’t know how that’s possible, but I rush towards the windows, throwing it open, I take large gulps of air.

 “I thought I was going to die…” I whisper as the cold air hit my face.

From downstairs I can hear the music.

“Happy eigteenth birthday Eddie.” I murmur to myself.

Taking in the scenery in front of me, the inner pack lands, where I have never stepped foot in, much less the two outer walls.

 That’s when I notice something crawling along the castle walls, peeking into the ball room.

“Huh?” I mutter, squinting.

My eyes are pretty much human since my wolf is like I said earlier, dormant.

 Suddenly there’s a low hum in my stomach, my body pulling me towards the person.

 I walk into my balcony, following the pull.

 There’s excitement at the pit of my stomach.

“...a song only your souls know.” the words strike me as I hurriedly walk along the wall, towards the person.

 The figure is clearer now, wearing a large cloak.

I can’t believe it.

My mate… I found.. my mate!

 My feet hurries faster, breaking into a sprint, the hum in my soul is louder, the pull is even more urgent.

 My mate’s head snaps up to look at me.

The hoodie of the cloak falls off in slow motion, I hold my breath, waiting to see my mate’s face for the first time.

 My stomach drops, and so does my smile.

“My mate… is a man??!”