JessaThe second Noah said my name, my stomach dropped like a stone.My first instinct was to run — to grab Mariah’s hand and hide in my room until he left. But my feet wouldn’t move. My whole body was frozen, like part of me needed to hear whatever excuse or insult he was about to throw at me.Mariah’s eyes narrowed into slits, her arms crossed over her chest like a human shield. “Oh, hell no. Absolutely not. You don’t just show up here after what you did last night.”But Noah didn’t even glance at her. His stormy blue eyes were locked on me, intense and almost desperate. “Jessa,” he said again, softer this time. “Please. Just… let me talk to you.”His voice was low, strained, and that scared me more than if he’d come in yelling.Mariah took a step toward him, her protective instincts in full swing. “No way. She doesn’t owe you a single second of her time.”I swallowed hard, my throat tight, and put a trembling hand on Mariah’s arm. “It’s okay,” I whispered, though my voice shook. “I
JessaBy the time sunlight filtered through my curtains, my eyes were puffy and my throat felt raw from all the crying I’d done. I’d barely slept, replaying last night over and over in my head like some horrible movie I couldn’t shut off.Every word I’d screamed at Noah echoed in my ears, ugly and broken.“I can’t help it that I’m not attractive! That no matter what I do, I can’t lose weight!”“I hate that I’m fat! I hate that I’m nothing like Jackson—he got everything and I got nothing!”The memory burned, leaving a sour taste in my mouth.I rolled over in bed, clutching my blanket tight around me like a shield. I didn’t want to face today. I didn’t want to face anyone. Maybe if I stayed in bed long enough, the world would forget I existed.But then there was a soft knock on my door followed by Mariah’s voice.“Jess? You awake?”I groaned. “No.”The door creaked open anyway, and Mariah peeked in, still in her pajamas but with her curls piled high on her head. She studied me for a mom
JessaI don’t remember how I got here.One second, I was in Daniel’s living room, surrounded by dozens of staring eyes, my heart splintering as the words poured out of me. The next, I was outside, running barefoot down the street, mascara streaking my cheeks and lungs burning.Now, I’m curled up on Mariah’s bed, clutching one of her pillows so tightly it feels like it’s the only thing keeping me from flying apart completely.The room smells like her vanilla-scented candles, soft and warm, but it does nothing to calm the storm raging inside me.I can still see them—Noah’s stunned face, Jackson’s disbelief, Daniel’s uncomfortable shuffle like he couldn’t wait to look away.I can still hear the silence after my outburst, the way the entire party stopped, everyone staring like I was some spectacle.And worst of all, I can still feel it.The way my heart cracked open when Noah didn’t say a single damn word in my defense.“Breathe, Jessa.”Mariah’s voice is gentle but firm. She’s kneeling b
JessaI can’t breathe.I storm through the sliding glass door, my pulse pounding so hard it roars in my ears. My hands shake as I shove past a group of kids near the counter, ignoring their laughter. I don’t even care where I’m going—I just need to get away before I completely fall apart in front of everyone.Behind me, I hear Noah call my name.“Jessa! Wait!”No.Not this time.He doesn’t get to follow me with some half-hearted apology, like a stupid band-aid on a wound he keeps slicing open.I whirl around before he can get too close, the words ripping out of me like they’ve been waiting years to escape.“Noah, shut up!”The entire room goes silent. Heads turn. Someone drops a plastic cup, the beer splattering across the tile. But I don’t care. Let them stare. Let them see me for once instead of looking right through me.“You don’t get to do this to me anymore,” I choke out, my voice trembling with rage and pain. “You don’t get to be nice to me when we’re alone and then act like I’m
JessaI should’ve kept my damn mouth shut.The second the words “Wouldn’t want you thinking you’re the queen of the party” slipped out, I saw it—the way Jessa’s eyes darkened, how her shoulders curled inward like I’d just slapped her.And then she shut down.She didn’t yell, didn’t snap back like Mariah would have.She just… folded into herself, hiding behind a fake smile.And it felt worse than if she’d screamed at me.Now, standing on the other side of Daniel’s living room with a cup of warm beer in my hand, I can’t stop replaying that moment in my head. I watch her across the room, half-hidden by Mariah’s group of friends. She’s laughing at something, but it doesn’t reach her eyes.I know I hurt her. Again.And this time, it wasn’t even in front of the guys. It was just me being… me.Stupid.Cowardly.The truth is, Jessa’s been under my skin for years.When I first met Jackson’s twin, she was just this shy, quiet girl who tagged along reluctantly, always hovering in the background.
JessaThe air inside Daniel’s house is thick with heat and noise the second I step through the door. The bass thumps so hard that it vibrates up through my shoes, and the crush of bodies and smell of spilled beer almost makes me turn right back around.Almost.Mariah’s hand tightens on mine, keeping me rooted to the spot. “Breathe, Jess,” she whispers, leaning close to my ear so I can hear her over the music. “You look incredible. Just keep walking. Head high.”I try. I really do.But it feels like every single pair of eyes in the room is on me.Some of them are wide with surprise, others narrowing in judgment. A couple of guys whisper to each other, and I don’t even want to know what they’re saying.My stomach twists.I knew coming tonight would be hard. After everything last weekend—the stupid spin-the-bottle game, everyone laughing, and Noah… laughing too—it took every ounce of courage I had to walk through that door.But Mariah wouldn’t let me hide.She said I deserved to feel lik