17

Jennie's POV 

I'm shaking from the cold and trying my best not to stare at Adrien's veiny hand on the steering wheel. Those hands are some of the strongest parts of my memory. He has one hand on the steering wheel and the other one on the gear stick. The universe must have something against me, because why…just tell me why I'm sitting next to the man I've been mentally resisting?

I'm fucked in a million ways. He's trying his best to look away from me, but it's impossible to ignore the heat between us. I clench my fists against my thigh as another unpredictable shiver runs through me and I lock my jaw. 

He called me Dahlia, I can't tell if it was an honest mistake or he's playing a game with me. That name is packed with meaning and he already said he doesn't want me here. What's the point in being stupid? I sneak a glance at him. My stupid heart is hurting at the way he's clenching his jaw. I guess he really doesn't want me here.

“Stop the car,” I say and he acknowledges me with a side glance before refocusing on the road ahead of us.

“I said—”

“I fucking heard you Jennie and no, I won't. No, I won't leave you on the roadside,” he says in that same clipped tone he has been addressing me with since I climbed into his car. I don't like it. I hate that he's not looking at me or acknowledging me.

“You don't want me here, so why are you forcing this?“

“Don't you get it? I'm struggling to be next to you because I can't get you out of my head.“ he confesses and my breath shudders. More. A selfish part of me wants to hear more. I want to know how much he struggles with himself just for me. We agreed never to address the elephant that forces its way into our middle every single time, but it doesn't erase the fact that it's right there. Our desire for each other is right here.

“I…” I start to speak but my words get caught in my throat. I grip the soaked up material of my dress and draw a deep breath. “I didn't mean to lie to you that night. I just didn't want to be Jennie for that night, I wanted to be someone else…someone who wasn't bound to rules and regulations,” I tell him. My voice is no more than a whisper, and the only sign that he's listening to me is the way he tightens his grip on the wheels. “I did walk in on my boyfriend and assumed it was over, but he came back and—”

“Fuck” he bites out like he wants to say something that would ruin us both.

“Professor—”

“Adrien. Just call me Adrien, Jennie.“

“Adrien” I breathe out his name. I'm trying to speak so I can diffuse the tension between us, but for some reason, the tension only seems to increase. I tuck a loose strand of dark brown hair behind my ear and he curses again. This attractive man curses a lot, he clenches his jaw a lot, and he tries to keep himself in control a lot.

The car stays quiet as he continues to drive. I lose track of how much time has passed and I'm comfortable soaking in the silence between us. As he kills the engine in front of a high-end apartment building, he draws a deep breath and drops his head against the headrest. His controlled breathing keeps adding life to the pitter-patters of rain hitting the roof of the car.

“I wasn't going to pick you up because I know the grip you have on me,” he finally speaks, turning his head to look at me.

His mouth. I shouldn't look at his mouth, but I can't look away. He says something my brain doesn't register, and I don't know why, but I lean forward to brush my lips against his.

“Fuck, Jennie” he groans and grabs my nape all of a sudden. A silent gasp slips past my lips as he holds me in place and looks into my eyes with a lingering darkness from the night at the club. Our lips are just a fraction away from each other. I'm on the verge of crying, and he…he's looking at me like he's on the verge of caving in. He should have driven away when he had the chance, I should have borrowed someone's phone in the restaurant, I should have gone with Oliver.

I close the gap and the second our lips touch, electricity runs through my body.

“I'm sorry…I'm so sorry, I don't know why—” I pull away, blushing and staring at my lap as he falls back against his seat. Raw tension so thick that you can cut through it with a knife is choking us up. I kissed my professor after pushing him away for days. I kissed Mr. Adrien Moreau while I'm dressed for a date with my boyfriend. He doesn't act like anything happened as he gets out of the car and opens the door on my behalf.

“We'll go into my apartment and get you warm. You can use my phone to call your boyfriend.” he offers and I nod. He gets out of the car, rubbing at his temple as he comes to the passenger's side. As he opens the door and holds his hand out for me to take, but I don't touch him.

We're both active volcanoes, and one tiny thing can make us erupt. If we do erupt… that eruption will undoubtedly ruin years of hard work.

“This way,” he mutters as he lets me walk ahead of him into the building.