Chapter 16

For me, time was the most precious thing I couldn't afford to waste now. I was discharged from the hospital the next day.

Jason had barely lifted me out of the car when he said, "There. We're home."

My eyes stung. My vision was blurry to the point that all I could make out was his vague silhouette. There were too many questions I wanted to ask him, yet they all remained caught in my throat.

Jason knew them all anyway—the ones I couldn't voice and even the ones I refused to voice.

I didn't know how he managed to reclaim the house from Sean. I loathed my own avoidance. Deep down, I knew that whatever price Jason had paid for this, I would never be able to repay him.

On Christmas Eve, Jason finally persuaded me to leave the house. We walked Pudgy around the park for a long time, then headed to the supermarket and bought heaps of groceries.

That afternoon, we made ravioli from scratch. After a nap, Jason brought me to St. Mary's church.

He told me that my prayers would be answered as long as my heart was sincere.

I wished then and there that I would no longer be included in Jason's prayers.

Back home, the kitchen filled with an enticing aroma. Pudgy pranced around the house, no doubt getting into trouble again. Jason called out to him softly. Wrapped in the familiar warmth, I couldn't help but drift off to sleep again.

I opened my eyes as Jason approached and placed a blanket over me. I was still somewhat groggy. From where I lay, his lashes seemed unbelievably long. Warm light fell across his face, casting soft shadows beneath his lids.

"Did I wake you?" he asked.

I shook my head.

Jason crouched down and wrapped me snugly in the blanket.

"It's good that you're awake, then. Take a look outside."

My brain hadn't fully caught up yet, but I turned toward the floor-to-ceiling window anyway.

Evening had fallen. The streetlights had flickered on, and at some point, it had begun snowing as well.

The first snow of the year had arrived on Christmas Eve.

I'd assumed there would be no snow this year, but looking at the snowy landscape, I couldn't help but let out a soft gasp.

Jason smiled, ruffling my hair.

As I'd already pushed myself past my limit today, he promised to take me out again tomorrow when the snow had settled.

When the doorbell rang, Jason was in the kitchen and didn't hear it. I wrapped the blanket around my body and went to answer the door instead.

After a month apart, I saw Sean again.

Though it had only been a few dozen days, it felt strangely as though a century had passed since I last saw him.

My days in the hospital had worn away my aggression without me realizing it. Apart from the first few seconds of surprise, seeing him again stirred no emotions in me. I gazed at him nonchalantly.

Sean looked utterly defeated. When our eyes met, I could feel the despair radiating from him.

"Why did you refuse treatment?" he asked, his voice hoarse.

I didn't reply, so he took a step closer. It had been too long since we last stood this close, staring at each other. Or rather, it had been too long since I'd looked at him without emotion.

All these years had changed him profoundly. The fiery young man I once adored was nowhere to be found now.

In a moment of distraction, I caught a glimpse of my pale, sickly reflection in his pupils.

I averted my gaze, then instinctively reached for the handle. I prepared to close the door, only for him to brace it with his hand.

"Are you really so eager to die?" he demanded.

As expected, he was still the same lunatic. His act of normalcy lasted no more than a few seconds.

"I know what you truly want," Sean continued. "Just wait a little longer. Adrian will be out of jail soon."

What was I really waiting for? For him to pull another dirty trick on me?

I didn't want to deal with him anymore. I wished I could go back in time and slap myself for opening the door in the first place. I sighed.

"Sean," I said his name the way I always did. He'd always been a man who commanded awe, though it was only now that I realized no matter how I felt toward him, it was never reciprocated.

Sean stared at me intently, his eyes red.

"Go home," I said.

We stood there for two minutes, locked in a standoff. The cold had long numbed my body.

I couldn't think of anything else to say.

A layer of snow had begun to collect at the doorstep.

When Sean knelt down in front of me, mist rose from the ground. I couldn't help but shiver as I watched him. He didn't speak. His long lashes fluttered slightly.

He pressed his lips together, his hands clenched into fists. His knuckles turned crimson.

"Live, Cassandra. Please, I'm begging you!"

I was speechless.

I couldn't tell if he was having a total breakdown—or a stroke, perhaps.

To think that I still possessed an allure that could drive him to his knees, even at death's door, was truly impressive.

"Get up." I narrowed my eyes, looking down at him. "If you truly feel this guilty, go kneel in front of my dad's grave."

I watched him freeze instantly. That debt of blood between us was something that could never be erased.

Sean's lips twitched. He could only look at me wordlessly.