Chapter 11

ALEXIS POINT OF VIEW

“I’m such an idiot. Fuck!" I threw away the bottle of wine I was holding. I’m in my mini-bar right now here at my condo. After I left Asia in my bedroom, my feet carried me here. I got some booze and drank it. I hurt her, I almost killed her earlier because of those damn memories.

Shit! Why is it that every time I bring a woman to my bed I see Hannah’s face?

"That bitch! If it wasn't for her, I wouldn't be like this. I can't hurt Asia! This is all her fault. I hate you, Hannah!"  I cried at the extreme anger I felt.

I lost control in bed earlier and hurt Asia. When I saw her naked above my bed, I lost my control and Hannah was the one I could see. When I saw Asia’s eyes earlier, scared and filled with tears, I came back to my senses.

I regretted the fear in her eyes.  But how can I make up for it? I’ve hrm her and almost killed her. After what I have done to her, I know she will leave me and that scares the hell out of me. I know I shouldn’t have felt this way because I just met her but I’m the first man in her life and that is something I should treasure.

Will she accept me if I apologize to her?  Or will she leave me because I’ve hurt her? God! I couldn’t imagine that she would walk away and leave me and my heart hurt as if it had been stabbed! I’m not numb to know my real feelings and I know Asia was very special. She's very special to me and I don’t want to lose her in my heart. I know we just met but I want to get to know her more.

Remembering her, I hurriedly got a basin with lukewarm water and found some smooth clothes, and quickly returned to the bedroom. But Asia was not in the bed. I got nervous and I immediately went inside the bathroom and there she was peacefully sleeping in the bathtub. I hurriedly picked her up and laid her in my bed. Her body was shaking in fear. It was me. I caused her this and I’m the one who’s to blame. I dried her tears using my hand. Seeing her in this state wants me to murder myself. How can I hurt a woman like her?

"God! What have you’ve done, Alexis! You're such an asshole!"  I blame myself for what happened to her. I can't bear to look at her in her condition right now.

This is all my fault!

If I had seen a psychiatrist in the past, I wouldn’t have hurt women.  And I can’t hurt Asia like this. If only Hannah hadn't cheated on me. If only she hadn't deceived me. If only she didn't create this monster inside me. If only I can control myself from being a monster. Maybe, just maybe I couldn’t hurt Asia now.

I thought Hannah really loved me! I believe in her. And then that day… She drugged me and...no! I shouldn’t be thinking that now! Asia is important right now.

"I'm so sorry, baby. I’m sorry if I lose my self-control. I thought I could do it, I thought I forgot. I know there is no forgiveness for what I did. And if you get angry tomorrow when you wake up or hate me. I will accept, baby..." I said and I started wiping her body.

Every time the clothes touched her skin, she cried out in pain. Even though I was careful I knew she was hurting in her sleep. I was very careful with every touch of the cloth on her smooth skin which is now pure marks of my bite. A big part of my heart hurt because of what I did to her.

Asia is a beautiful woman. She has silky skin, fluffy eyelashes, a pointed nose, a heart-shaped face and soft lips that I will never tire of kissing. How could I have hurt her just like that? God! I am really a monster.

“No, please! No. Don't hurt me..." she moaned weakly.

I'm sure she dreamed of me hurting her.

"Shh! Baby, I'm here. I won't hurt you again," I hugged her carefully. "I'm so sorry, baby. Sorry."  I repeatedly apologize to her.

Until she became relaxed and her breathing was even, that means she was back to sleep.

I continued wiping her body and I also treated the bite marks I made. I applied ointment to her skin so that it would not leave a trace. I’m glad I met a good doctor and he invented a medicine to heal the wounds quickly or so that no traces would be left on the body for two days.

When I was done I lay down next to Asia. I'm not comfortable because I'm thinking about Hannah, shit! Won't that woman leave my mind even just tonight? Dammit!!!

I stiffened as Asia moved and hugged me. My muscles trembled and I stiffened but I tried to control the monster inside me. To avoid thinking of Hannah, I just stared at the beautiful face of Asia until drowsiness swallowed me. And this is the first time I felt complete since the day Hannah left me. And I won't let that feeling go.

ANASTASIA'S POV

I WAKED UP TO THE WARM hug on my body and the hard object around my waist. It was poking me if telling me to wake up. When I realized what it was, my face became red. 

When I opened my eyes fear and anger consumed me especially, seeing Alexis sleeping next to me. I wanted to stay away from his hug because I really hated him but as I stared at him for a long time I felt a little sorry for him. And gradually the fear in my chest disappeared.

What happened to him in the past and who is Hannah in his life? I am his secretary and I should have known his past. But why didn’t I know his past? Is this a secret that his mother is trying to warn me about?

I have so many questions in my mind that I wanted to have an answer to but didn’t have. I want to ask him but I know he will leave just like what he did last night. I admit, Alexis already has a place in my heart.

From the day our eyes first met when I entered as his secretary. I already felt a rapid beating in my heart and it deepened even more with each passing day.

Even though I knew how much he changes women every day it didn’t stop my heart to beat for him. But at the same time, my desire to get revenge for ruining the life of the only person who was important to me. And thinking of my sister, my feelings for him disappeared and was replaced by anger.

And I will make sure he will suffer for what he did. The attraction I feel is not enough to forgive and just forget my plan. I have to suppress how I feel.

I stared at him for a while until he opened his eyes.

"Good morning," he smiled but his smile suddenly disappeared and was replaced by worry. “How are you feeling?”

I immediately averted my eyes and was slightly backward on the bed. I didn’t speak because I was suddenly scared when I heard his voice. I closed my eyes and tried to relax myself.

Seeing his eyes and hearing his voice made me shiver and the memories of last night were back.  Even though my body hurt I quickly got out of bed but I almost fell due to the pain between my thighs.

"Baby—."  He quickly held my arm but I quickly screamed.

“No!” I quickly avoided holding him. “I hate you! I don’t want to see you!”

"I know."  He said sadly. “And I know saying sorry won’t change anything. But I will still ask for your forgiveness. Please forgive me.”

“I don’t want to see you. Let me go home.”

“I can’t. Not in that situation. Even if you hate me and curse me, I don’t care. I just can’t let you go home like that. I promise I won’t touch you.”

He got up quickly and left the bed. He walked over to me and was about to lift me when I suddenly slapped his two hands.

“Don’t touch me!” I shouted at him.

Every time his hand touches my body I think of how he almost killed me. I think about how he went crazy and seemed to be a different person. I'm scared of him.

“But you have to go back to bed while I prepare your bath. Please,” he pleaded.

But I did not give him permission to touch me.

“I don't want to hold you. It just reminds me of what you did to me last night.”

I struggled to go back to bed even though I was weak from the pain in my body. When I sat down I turned to him and stared.

"You are a monster!" I said.

He lowered his shoulders looking at me.  His world seemed to collapse because of what I said.

"I know and I'm sorry."

“I don't need your sorry! I know I don't own this room but can you leave now. I don't want to see you or even hear your voice. Because every time I see and hear you, my anger and hatred for you return. So please, get out!”

He stared at me for a while until he let out a deep sigh. “If you need anything—.”

 "I don't need anything, I don't need your help." I was quick to cut to what else he was going to say. He nodded and quietly left the room.

When he comes out, I can breathe properly. I shouldn’t stay here. I need to get out as soon as possible but how, if I can't walk properly? Now, I regret using my body to succeed in my revenge.  I have to stop this and rethink another plan.

 ALEXIS POV:

When I came out of my room, I went straight to the minibar and took out the wine. I stared at the glass of wine and was about to drink it when Asia suddenly entered my mind. I immediately returned the bottle of wine to the container and quickly brought the glass filled to the kitchen and washed it. I shouldn’t drink any alcohol because I have someone to take care of.

Asia was in that state because of my actions. I know she doesn't want to see me because she only remembers what happened and what I did to her last night.

What happened to me in the past, It’s not enough for me to excuse myself for hurting her. That reason has never been right for me to hurt a woman. And that woman inside my bedroom has a special place in my heart. And I won't let her get away from me because of what I did.

"I need to feed her so she can take the medicine," I whispered softly to myself.

I quickly cooked her breakfast and when it was cooked, I quickly put it on the tray and had a glass of water and medicine.

I knocked in my room. I was nervous about whether she would let me in or not.  But she didn't answer so I just went inside. Asia was sleeping in my bed. I let out a deep breath and walked closer to her.

I put the tray that was full of food and there was also fruit on the table just to the side of the bed. Asia slept soundly.

I quickly went into the bathroom to take a shower. After I took a bath and got dressed, I filled the bathtub with water so that later when Asia woke up, she could take a bath as well.

When I finished, I went out of the bathroom. She was still sleeping. I just shook my head and took a note and wrote. I know he doesn’t want to see me and that’s all I can do right now. I hurried out of the room and headed to the living room. I sat down and called Evo.

"What?" Evo’s irritating voice was filled in another line.

I know I disturbed his sleep.

"Do you know a female doctor?" I ask him.

“What do you think of me? Friends of women of various professions?”

I hold my head.  "Maybe you know someone?"

This friend of mine is really useless!

“Hon, who is that?! ” I heard a woman's voice.

“My friend, Alexis. He asked if I knew a female doctor.”

I just listened to their conversation.

"Why?"

"Maybe this friend of mine wants a doctor," Evo laughed.

“I don’t need any woman! I just need a female doctor for her,” I said quickly.

"Are you sure?"  the woman seems in doubt.

If I'm not mistaken, that woman is Evo's wife. I only saw her once at their wedding and I can say that my friend's wife is beautiful but there seems to be something wrong.

"Yes, I'm sure,"  I answer quickly.

“My husband will just send the doctor's number. And I’m warning you never to flirt with this doctor if you don’t want a genital mutilation. And also this Doctor can kill you if you tried flirting with her. I’m just giving you a warning because you're my husband's friend.”

“Thank you---”

“And one more thing, Alexis Callahan. Stop calling my husband if it’s about a woman! I will not hesitate to pull my trigger if you do that again. Understand?”

“Y-yes…” I answered nervously. I know Evo’s wife doesn't joke around. And if she's giving you a warning it means one thing, she was dead serious.

“Good. Now, fuck off!”

After a second, the call ended abruptly. And only the alert tone of my message rang. I just shook my head and opened the messages.

“How dare you talk to my wife! No one can talk to my wife except me!”  I laughed softly at Evo’s text. I opened another of his messages and read the doctor's name and number.

 I quickly called the number.

“Hello, who are you? How did you find out my personal number?” said a female voice.

Her personal number? Not her secretary or assistant? And did Evo send me the personal number of this doctor? How did he know her?

“Hey, you bastard! I have no intention of wasting my time with people like you.  Bye— ”

"Wait!"  I quickly stopped her. "My name is Alexis Callahan and I asked for your number from my friend."

"And who's that bastard? Last time I checked, this is my personal number and no man knows it," she asked as if raising an eyebrow.

"Evo Atlaire Montenegro."

"That crazy bitch!"

"What?"

“Nothing! What do you want from me, asshole?”

I winced. She doesn't really know me but if she can call me that it seems easy.

 "Are you really a doctor?"

 “Are you questioning my profession?”

 “Sorry. It's just not obvious—. ”

 “What do you want? You're wasting my precious time! ”

"My girlfriend needs a doctor."

“And you’re talking to the best doctor in town. Take your girlfriend to my clinic.”

“No. She can't walk and her whole body hurts.”

 "Let me guess, why she can't walk because she gave you her virginity and yours is big so the inside of her hymen was injured."

 "Yes and maybe?"

 "Poor girl. Another laceration because of men ruthless. Bring her to my clinic.”

“But, she can’t---”

“That’s not the problem.”

“No, I mean, she doesn't want to be touched.”

“And you two have sex last night and now you’re telling me that your girl doesn’t like your touch? Are you kidding me? Are you not good in bed and she’s avoiding your touch?”

“No. That's not the case. My girlfriend---”

“What did you do, Mr. Callahan?”

“I-I k-kind of h-hurt her.”

“Oh, so you like BDSM.” I heard her tsked on the other line. “Text me the address, asshole!” She quickly ended the call.

I immediately gave the address of my condo even though I was confused by her words. Minutes passed and the doctor arrived immediately. When I opened the door, she went straight to my room where Asia was. She didn't even ask where my room was. And her face looks badtrip. But I will admit that this doctor is beautiful but Asia is more beautiful.

I immediately followed into the room but the door was locked. I just shook my head but I put my ear to the door. I never thought I would be able to use what my secretary used to do when I’m having sex in my office.

“I thought which woman would be my patient. I didn't know it was you, Asia.” I heard the doctor take a deep breath.

Does she know Asia?

“I’m sorry…”

“Silly woman. That’s okay if you like someone and give your virginity to him. What I don’t like is that man outside this room like BDSM. Look at your body, it's full of wounds.”

“It’s not like that.”

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Anyway, before anything else. Can you answer me truthfully?”

“What is it?”

“If you rate his cock at 1 to 10, how big is he?”

"9" Asia answered weakly but I heard that.

“That's why the wound inside you is so deep. He really ruined you.” I heard the doctor laugh.

I immediately left the door and sat in the living room while waiting for Asia and the Doctor. After a few minutes, the doctor came out and handed me a paper. 

“Buy everything written there and give it to Asia to drink. And I'm telling you that sex is forbidden for a month.”

A month? I don't think I can do that!

"I don’t care if you suffer but I care if it’s my friend."  It was as if she could read my mind. “Why do all my friends always have lacerations after their first night?  Are you really that big?” she asked and suddenly her eyes dropped to my pants.

When I thought of what Evo's wife had said, I immediately brought my palms to my front and seemed to be protecting my friend against her. The doctor rolled her eyes. “I'm not interested in you. You are not my type. I'm just curious if you're really that big.”

"What?" I couldn’t help but ask her.

She just turned and proceeded to leave my condo. I shook my head and closed the door. I walked into the bedroom.

"Can I come in?"

 "Not allowed!"  Asia's quick response.

"I'll just help you to take a bath."

"I can handle it myself. Get out!"

I didn’t leave the room and wait for her.  A few seconds later I heard her scream.  I hurried in and ignored her anger. I immediately took her to the bathroom. I knew she was going to the bathroom.  I quickly put her in the bathtub and then I left her because I knew she didn’t want to see me.