COLE
"Hey uhm, guys I need to tell you something", I said.
"What's that?".
"There's this kid you guys pick on, his name is uhm, Nate", I said.
"Oh yeah the Dude we paint dipped on, what's up?".
"Can y'all like, chill on him, he's kinda a family friend of mine and, his mom is really complaining about his mental health", I said.
Andre laughed, "Since when the fuck did we care about mental health", he said.
"Look just cut him some slack ok, go pick on some other dudes".
"Who is he talking about?", Newton asked.
"That gay dude", Kendal said.
"Oh oh right right, of course how could I forget, dude he is so cool to play around with, I can't stop messing with that dude", Newton said.
"Just cut him some slack okay? plus he is tutoring me".
"You got a tutor?", Newton asked.
"Yeah, he's like the smartest kid in this school, he's my only way that Harvard", I said.
"Why the fuck will you get a gay dude to tutor you, do you want him to jerk off to you pronouncing words or saying his name?", Andre asked and they laughed.
"No it's not that it's just... he's the only person I know that can do this well, and you know I need to go to Harvard ", I stated.
"No wonder you saved him today, I was wondering since when did Cole Michaelson Start doing Charity?".
"Dude it's not that okay I just... ughh fuck just do this one thing for me please", I said.
"Fine, we'll back down on your little tutor boy until you clear your papers ", Kendal said.
"Thank you ", I said.
Almost immediately, my door forcefully swung open.
Everyone jumped.
"Dad the fuck?".
"What are you doing? why Is the door locked?", he asked.
"Locked? dude you just threw it open, what the fuck?".
"Aren't you supposed to be reading? been talking about Harvard all year and yet nothing, your academics are as sad as your life", he said.
I stood up.
"Let's go talk outside", I said.
"No why would we do that when we can do it here? right now? or what you don't want Mr shaming me in front of your friends?".
Unfortunately they are the ones ashamed of you, and not me.
"Guys can you please excuse me", I said and they stood up to leave.
.My father shut the door blocking them from leaving.
I exhaled, "I got a tutor", I said calmly.
"Who?".
"Nate Thompson, your friend, Mr Thompson son", I said.
"You guys use to be best of friends until you decided to leave him and now look at your life", the way he slurred, I knew he was drunk, again.
it was better not to say anything while he was drunk.
Just ignore him.
"I'll do better ", I said.
"You better clear your results else I promise you that I'm gonna make your life a living hell ", he said and stormed out of my room, falling at a point and then stood up.
I sighed and laid down on my bed.
"Dude, don't worry we've got you, I promise we won't pick on that Nate dude again, infact we'll make him tutor you for sure, can't let you live any longer with that man", Kendal said.
"I can't even stay here any longer, it's like the more I stay the more it gets worse".
"You can come stay at mine till whenever, my mom likes you and she makes good pancakes ", Newton said.
I shook my head, "Naaa, I don't want to inconvenience anyone ", I said.
"Well if you ever change your mind the offer is still open", Newton said.
Am hour later they left my house leaving me all alone in this lonely mansion with my sick in the head Dad.
I looked my room and went to the roof top to smoke.
She was there as always.
"You got your own blunt today?", she asked.
I smirked and showed her mine.
"Good cuz I finished the one I got for you ", she said and I chuckled.
"Heard your Dad screaming a while ago ", she said.
"Talking about my grades, but I got a tutor ", I said.
"Really? who is she?".
I chuckled, "A he, my old friend Nate", I said.
She smirked.
"What did you promise him?".
"That my friends will stop bullying him", I said.
"That's a crazy deal, I would have asked for like a million dollar ", she said.
"He's rich, doesn't really need that shit", I stated.
I hugged her and leaned on her.
"I've missed you", I said honestly.
"You know where to find me you just never show up", she said.
"In your bedroom?", I asked pretending like I didn't know what she was talking about.
"I'm not gonna fuck you Cole, and you know it"
"Never say never", I said and winked and she chuckled
"You are the gayest straightest guy I've met", she said.
"That's the sexy thing about being bisexual", I said.
"You're not Bisexual you're just attracted to Nate, you haven't found any other guy attractive since 5 years now".
"I have, there's this dude that winked at me in the strip club the other day".
"What was he doing?".
"Dancing on the pole",I said.
She rolled her eyes at me, he's a stripper, of course he's gonna be attractive, my God open your eyes you damn fool".
"I don't know okay, I don't really wanna figure out if I'm bisexual or not, I just want things to remain This way and not further complicate things", I said.
"And if your Dad ever finds out?", she asked.
I did. a sign of my throat cutting.
"So how are you going to sit back and watch Nate tutor you without trying to kiss him because I tried tutoring you and you almost fucked me".
"It's not my fault you can't resist my charm", I teased.
"I think I can manage, I mean he doesn't like me so .. it's just tutoring", I said.
"It's just tutoring", she said mocking me.
Almost immediately, we saw her parents car drive in.
"Oh shit my parents are back, I have to go, does my breath smell like weed?", she asked.
"Yes", I said laughing and she groaned.
"I'll go eat garlic or something, bye Cole, see you tomorrow", I said and she used the tree to go into her house.
"Bye Abby", I said and she disappeared, leaving me alone to my thoughts
now.CHAPTER TEN The journal was the only place where I could breathe.At school, I kept my head down, shoulders hunched, pretending I didn’t hear the whispers. At home, I smiled at my parents enough to keep them from worrying. But in my journal? I was raw, exposed, bleeding ink onto paper.That Tuesday night, after the tutoring session that left me hollow, I wrote until my hand cramped.Cole remembered Pop-Tarts. He remembered me. Not just the tutor-me, not just the nobody. He noticed something small and stupid, and it made me feel seen in a way I can’t explain. But then, he still lets Ariana hang off his arm in school like I don’t exist. I hate myself for being jealous. I hate that I can’t stop.The words blurred. I dropped the pen, rubbing my eyes. I didn’t bother to lock the journal away. Just shoved it under the pillow like always, where it was close enough to feel safe.But safety is fragile.The rest of the week crawled. Cole and I met for tutoring as usual. He was quie
CHAPTER NINE If Monday tasted bitter, Tuesday was straight poison.I didn’t see him in the morning, which was normal. I told myself it didn’t matter, that I wasn’t scanning the hallways for blond hair and broad shoulders, that I wasn’t listening for his laugh under the noise. But by third period, I spotted him.And my stomach dropped.Cole leaned against the lockers, arm slung casually around Amanda’s waist. Amanda—his on-and-off girlfriend since sophomore year, the girl with glossy hair and nails sharp enough to draw blood. She tilted her head up at him, laughing too loud at something he’d said.He didn’t laugh back, not really. Just smiled faintly, eyes distant. But his arm stayed where it was, his perfect image intact.I froze mid-step, heat climbing my neck. My binder felt heavy in my hands. Around me, the hallway blurred into white noise.Jealousy wasn’t new. I’d had it simmering for years, every time I saw him with her. But this time was different. Because this time I kn
CHAPTER EIGHT Monday mornings always tasted bitter, like burnt coffee I wasn’t old enough to drink.I dragged myself through the front doors of school, head down, shoulders tight. The hallway noise washed over me—laughter, slamming lockers, the squeak of sneakers on linoleum.Kendal spotted me first, of course. He always did. His smirk widened like he’d been waiting all weekend for his chance.“Watch your step, Donalds,” he sneered, sticking a foot out as I passed.I braced for impact, but before I could trip, a sharp voice cut through the noise.“Knock it off, Kendal.”I froze. My eyes darted sideways. Cole leaned against a locker, arms crossed, gaze cold as steel.Kendal laughed nervously. “Chill, man. I was just messing around.”“Mess with someone else.” Cole’s tone left no room for argument.Kendal raised his hands in mock surrender and backed off.My pulse thundered in my ears. For a second, Cole’s gaze flicked to me—quick, almost hidden—but I caught it. My stomach flipped.Th
CHAPTER SEVEN Friday afternoons used to feel endless. Now, they slipped through my fingers too fast.I told myself it was ridiculous, counting down the hours until six o’clock like a little kid waiting for Christmas. But no matter how many equations I solved in chemistry or how many pages of history notes I copied, my brain looped the same thought: two hours with Cole.At school, nothing had changed between us. He was still a ghost to me in the hallways. A tall, perfect ghost in a varsity jacket who laughed with his friends, passed me without a glance, and made my chest ache with the effort of pretending I didn’t care.“Move it, loser.” Kendal’s shoulder slammed into mine hard enough to rattle my teeth. My binder flew from my hands, scattering worksheets across the linoleum. Laughter followed me down the hallway.I crouched, gathering papers. No one helped. They never did.Except—when I glanced up, just for a second—I saw Cole standing at the far end of the hall. His blu
CHAPTER SIXI told myself not to stare, but my eyes betrayed me.Cole sat across from me at the desk, his perfect blonde head bent over the notebook, brows furrowed as if Newton’s laws had personally insulted him. The lamplight caught the line of his jaw, the curve of his mouth.Every few minutes he would glance at me to see if he was getting the answer right, and every time I nearly forgot how to breathe.This was our rhythm now.Tuesdays and Fridays, in his room or sometimes the dining table, textbooks stacked like walls between us. For a while, I could pretend we were just tutor and student, nothing more. But then he’d laugh at one of my sarcastic comments, or nudge my pen away with his longer fingers, and the illusion cracked.“Got it,” he said finally, scribbling an answer down. “Acceleration equals force over mass. Easy.”I gave him a small smile. “Yeah, easy. Took you twenty minutes, but easy.”He smirked and tossed the pen at me, and for a heartbeat we were two normal boy
CHARLIE I swallowed hard, this is going to end crazy.I led him inside."Where are you your parents?", he asked."Dad got back yesterday so, they're kinda enjoying their little moment together so we went ok a little outing", I said."Cute", he said and I led him upstairs to my room ."Still have this Teen Titans poster on your wall?", he asked."I haven't gotten over them, not any year soon", I said.We settled down on my table."So, uhm, what are we starting with?", he asked."Everything ",he said dumping all his text books on my table."Which subject do you think you like a little, just a little?",he asked.He shrugged, "Art I guess, Fine art, cuz it's the only thing I actually enjoy doing, that and basketball ", he said.I nodded, "Okay and what's the worse subject?"."Maths "."Great, so we know your strength and weakness, what's the best grade you've had asides art"."Physics, I had a C"."You're not that terrible I've been worse", I said.Then we started with physics, I was bas