Silence After the Almost

Dinner that night was both awkward and wholesome. I avoided eye contact with Mac throughout the dinner and it seemed like he was doing the same too. I was a bit upset with what he said but I wasn't going to give up just like that.

That night I barely slept, not because I couldn’t…but because I didn't want to.

Every time I closed my eyes, it replayed. The way his hands felt, the way he looked at me, the way everything almost went too far…And how close we were to getting caught. And I would honestly do anything to do that again.... I mean except the almost being caught by mom part.

I turned over in my bed, letting out a quiet sigh and eventually forced myself to sleep.

The next morning felt… normal, like yesterday didn’t even happen. I got ready slowly, dragging things out longer than I needed to, because part of me didn’t want to go downstairs.

When I finally walked into the kitchen, my mom was already there, scrolling through her phone while sipping coffee.

“Morning B,” she said casually.

“Morning mom,” I replied, grabbing a glass of water before giving her a hug.

"Did you sleep well?"

"I guess." i replied.

"Hope you enjoyed your day?"

"Yeahh I did." I smiled after I remembered everything that happened.

Then he walked in. Like nothing happened. Like he didn’t have me pinned under him just hours ago.

“Morning,” he said, calmly.

I looked at him and it was a big mistake. Because the second our eyes met, that feeling came back instantly. I felt a chill run through my body just by looking at him.

“Morning,” I said, a little quieter.

He nodded slightly and moved past me like I was just… there. Like I was normal, like we were normal.

We ate breakfast. We didn't really talk much just small talks and random conversations. My mom wasn't that cold to him anymore, I mean it was still there but not as much.

At some point, my mom stood up. “I’m heading out early,” she said, grabbing her bag.

“Okay,” I replied.

“Don’t be late for school,” she added, already halfway out.

And just like that, She was gone. The moment the door shut, the air shifted.

I leaned against the counter, watching him. He didn’t look at me. He was acting busy.

“You’re really going to act like nothing happened?” I asked. He paused for a second, then continued what he was doing.

“That’s exactly what we’re going to do,” he said.

I let out a small laugh.

“Wow.”

Still nothing from him. I pushed myself off the counter and walked closer. Slowly and deliberately.

“Mac,” I said.

He finally looked at me and there it was again, that tension, that thing neither of us could pretend wasn’t there.

“That didn’t feel like ‘nothing’ to me,” I added quietly.

His jaw tightened.

“It shouldn’t have happened,” he said.

I stepped closer not backing down this time.

“And yet it did.”

He didn’t move and my heart started racing again. Same feeling. Same pull.

“You didn’t stop me,” I said softly.

His eyes darkened slightly.

“I should have.”

“But you didn’t.”

For a second, it felt like we were right back there, In the living room.

“Bea,” he said, his voice low now. “Don’t.”

“Don’t what?” I asked, tilting my head slightly.

He didn’t answer, he just looked at me and that was enough.

I took one more step forward.

Now we were close. Really close.

My voice dropped. “Say it.”

He swallowed slightly.

Then stepped back.

“This ends here,” he said.

I stared at him.

Then laughed softly.

He just looked at me and walked off.

I stood there for a few seconds after he walked away. Just staring at the empty space he left behind.

“This ends here.” I mimicked and let out a quiet laugh under my breath.

Like it was that easy, like he could just say it and everything would magically disappear.

I grabbed my bag and headed out for school, but my mind wasn’t there.

Not even close.

Classes dragged.

Teachers talked.

Students laughed.

But I didn’t hear anything and I didn't really care either. Because my mind kept going back to him.

The way he looked at me, the way he said it like he was trying to convince himself more than me. At some point, I caught myself zoning out completely.

“Bea?”

I blinked, snapping back.

“Huh?”

“You’ve been staring at the same page for five minutes,” Maye said, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh… I’m just tired,” I replied quickly.

She gave me a look like she didn’t fully believe me, but she didn’t push.

And that was good, because I didn’t even know how to explain what was going on in my own head.

By the time school ended, I was exhausted, not physically but mentally and emotionally.

I knew nobody was coming to pick me up so I just took the bus home. When I got home, the house was quiet.

I dropped my bag and walked in slowly.

“Hello?” I called out.

No response.

I exhaled softly and made my way to the kitchen grabbed an apple and headed towards my room, but I stopped when I heard voices coming from the study. The voices was low and I hoped it was not what I was thinking.

I moved closer, not even thinking, trying to eavesdrop. Then I heard his voice clearly.

“…I said I’ll handle it,” he was saying.

Handle what? I frowned slightly, stepping a little closer.

“And how exactly are you planning to do that?” another voice replied.

A man. Lucky Mac. I didn’t recognize it. I leaned in slightly, trying to hear better.

“I’ll figure it out,” Mac said, his tone sharper now.

“This isn’t something you ‘figure out,’” the man snapped. “You’re already pushing your luck.”

My brows furrowed. What were they talking about?

“I said I’ve got it,” Mac repeated, clearly getting irritated now.

“Just don’t let things get out of control,” the man said. “You know what’s at stake.”

I stepped back quickly as I heard movement towards the door. The door opened and I turned immediately, pretending like I had just walked in.

“Oh, you’re back,” he said, his tone normal again.

“Yeah,” I replied, watching him carefully.

He stepped out, closing the door behind him.

“School was okay?” he asked casually.

“Yeah,” I said slowly.

My eyes lingered on the door behind him.

Then back at him.

“Who were you talking to?”

He paused for a second.

Then shrugged. “Work.”

“Work?”

“Yeah.”

I stared at him, trying to read him, but he wasn’t giving me anything.

“Sounded serious,” I said intentionally taking a bite from my apple.

He held my gaze for a second.

Then looked away.

“It’s nothing you need to worry about.” He was shutting me out. I crossed my arms slightly.

“Everything is ‘nothing’ with you.”

He didn’t respond and silence fell between us.

Then I stepped closer. Because of course I did.

“You’re avoiding me,” I said quietly.

He didn’t even try to deny it.

“Good,” I added nodding.

That made him look at me confused.

“Because it means you’re thinking about it too.”

His jaw tightened as he rolled his eyes.

And just like that I knew I was right.

“You should focus on something else,” he said.

I smiled slightly.

“I tried,” I said taking another bite of my apple. “Didn’t work.” I added.

I stepped even closer now, closing the gap again. Because why not? His breath hitched slightly. There it was.

“You can pretend all you want,” I whispered. “But you can’t act like it didn’t happen.”

He stepped back again. Keeping his distance again.

“Go to your room, Bea,” he said firmly this time.

I stared at him for a second, then shook my head slightly.

But I didn't argue I turned and walked away biting on my apple…A small smile played on my lips because I knew he wasn’t over it. Not even close to being.

And sooner or later…

He was going to give in.