ONE WITH SECRETS

CHAPTER SIX(ONE WITH SECRETS)

     Lillian sat down in the living room,she was watching something in her phone and smiling. Mark walked in,looking stressed. Before,Lillian would rush to him,kiss him and unbutton his shirt but it was just a "welcome home".

           Lillian received a text from her mother in law,she wanted to have lunch the next day. She was trying to be nice but to Lillian it was "pressuring" to her. Mark sat close to her,the night was cool and so was the bed,a bed that was supposed to be warm.

     "You know, I had dinner with your mom,she wants to mend our relationship. I'm having lunch with her tomorrow". Even when and after Lillian spoke, Mark just kept reading the magazine in his hands,he didn't reply her.

     " You know I said something right? Lillian asked sitting close to him,holding his hands to get his attention.

     " I hope you are not angry,because you've been playing the silent game since. You had dinner with my mom,you didn't even tell me about it and now,after two weeks,you think its right to tell me only after two weeks,well,you can have breakfast with her too,you don't have to tell me"  Mark continued reading his magazine.

       The fact is,even I want Lillian to tell Mark that she can't have a baby and move on. Nobody would like for someone to keep them in the dark.

       "I wish I never married you" . After Lillian said those words,she left the room. Mark just fixed his gaze on her till she exited the room.

        This secret she was hiding from her husband wasn't fun and have never being fun since the beginning, to her,the secret was suffocating. Denim on denim was an outfit for lunch.

      "Good afternoon mom,sorry I'm late" .Mark's mom didn't ask why she was late,she just nodded her head her and asked to seat.

      "I'm sorry but I'm going to start this way,when do you plan on having a baby? Mark is my only child,you should know how anxious I am to have a grandchild. It's been two years and I have been patient,trying to know my position and to avoid meddling in your affairs but this.......bothers me. Mark's Mom was trying hard to speak politely but it didn't seem so.

      Lillian's hands suddenly became cold and she fought hard not to cry. She was controlling herself but she didn't know when she told her(Mark's mom).

   I'm sorry but I'm unable to have a child." I don't think I can produce a child. Lillian didn't know if she made the right decision or not,if she was going to be judged or not, she just wanted to free herself from this secret. It wasn't her fault,being unable to have a child isn't her fault,she isn't the first and definitely won't be the last. But of everybody,why did she tell Mark's mom. The table was silent for a while.

        "I'm sorry, but you'll have to explain,you visited a Doctor or what? Was she asking or demanding for an answer.

         After meeting Mark's mom,instead of crying all day like she did  before,Lillian decided to busy herself,she went shopping for dinner. It has been long she made fried rice and salad,she decided to cook that.

       While she was buying cabbage, a young man was buying too,he looked at her and asked which one she'd prefer to buy pointing at two cabbages.

        "I don't know, just buy anyone". She replied in an aggressive manner. After behaving like that,she thought about apologizing but she noticed that the young man was staring at her.

    "Why are you staring at me like that"  Lillian asked moving her head in a some what unsure manner.

    "Because you want to apologize,I'm waiting for you to apologize." He said so smiling.

       "Are you joking with me right now or what, are you demanding for an apology? She was angry .

        " Hi,I'm Jay and I hear or read(he laughed ) people's thought. I am exploring this......Lillian cut in,shutting him up.

      "I don't really care, psycho" she walked after the cabbage seller gave her the cabbage she bought. The cabbage seller asked Jay to read her thoughts too while laughing and Jay knew she was making mockery of him.

           At home Lillian arranged the table while humming one of her favourite romantic song. When Mark came home,she hugged and kissed him. He was surprised she made such a wonderful dinner. "My sweets is coming back,he smiled and hugged her tightly.

                  Mark tried to ask about the lunch she had with his mom but she wanted to have a cool time talking with him,about him and her,their sweetest memories together.

       After the dinner, Mark told  Lillian that he was going to bathe and she suggested that they do it together. 

     "We should finish this romantic night,shouldn't we? She asked while dancing in her bathe robe. She couldn't even understand herself,today wasn't nice for her but she wanted to be happy with her lover,she wished the night would never end. But the cuddling led to a romantic sex that night and of course,the night ended.

         Lillian was home alone when the door bell rang,she opened the door and it was Mark's mom. Lillian wasn't happy seeing her,her mood changed.

       "  I have someone who can help you have a child. All you need to do is to travel for like two weeks and I'll take care of the rest." Mark's mom had always been like that,she didn't care about the other person's opinion, she always like getting her way.

     Lillian was silent,the words just kept echoing in her head "someone who can help you have a child". How she wanted to say no,but she  ended up saying  " I'll travel next week". Mark's Mom hugged her and left but before she left,she told her that it wasn't her fault.

       Is she playing an emotional game with Lillian or what?