004

Chapter 4

Thalia's pov 

“Are you sure you used protection?” Shelly asked for about the millionth time as we stopped at a red light, my fingers were tapping rapidly at the dashboard. 

“We did, Shelly I'm not stupid of course we did…and I haven't been with anyone else before you ask you know he was my first and only,” 

“Yessh, calm down, I already knew that you're not a slut like the rest of us,” she said with a sarcastic hiss.

My chest fell.

“Shelly, you know I don't mean it like that..” I tried to touch her shoulder and then she hit the gas, forcing the car into motion.

We were swallowed by this awkward silence for a while then she finally spoke up.

“Are you going to tell him?” She said her voice almost escaping as a whisper. 

I folded my hands on my lap, “I don't know,” 

“Which means you won't,” she said her tone accusatory, “Talia that baby is his as much as it is yours as well you can't just make such a big decision without consulting him he needs to know his options too,” 

My fingers clenched into a tight fist.

“What about Crescent University?” 

She gave me a side eye look. 

“Are you being for real right now? We're talking about a baby growing inside of you and you can't shut up for one second about Crescent University!” 

“Shelly I–”

“No, I've been holding back all this time but you're so incredibly selfish!” She came at me speeding up, “all you ever think about is yourself and what you want, first when you started dating Varian and you didn't have a second in the world left for me anymore,” 

“But I invited you several times to hang out with us! You are the one always turning us down!” I said I was offending myself with the truth. 

“Get real Talia that's why I say you're so self-centered how could I be hanging out with a couple watching you guys being all mushy and gross, I'll just end up third wheeling no matter what,” 

I sighed.

“But you never even checked it out yourself, you didn't even try–”

“And now Crescent University, you have a guy who will move mountains for you who loves you more than life itself but you roll your eyes at that and think it's not good enough. This pack is nothing more to you than a backwater place holding you from where you truly deserve to be. You call me your best friend but I knew I'm just a placeholder for the people you think are worth being by your side,” 

We fell into another awkward silence, it was like the more I tried to convince Shelly otherwise the more she believed everything I did was selfish and inconsiderate.

Perhaps I was selfish. 

But the plans had already been made and I had already said my goodbyes.

This child…it would only complicate things.

“I need a little more time to process this myself, I'm going to tell him in 3 days,” 

That was a lie. 

I was going to take care of this in 3 days, and whatever mental scars behind it I would bear it.

“Fine, if you don't tell him by that time then I'll do it by myself,” 

The way she said it almost sounded like a threat, but I knew Shelly wouldn't do that to me even if she was this angry.

From that today I started taking herbal concoctions that would naturally flush the pregnancy out with little to no effect. 

During that time, I avoided Varian like a plague.

A small portion of me felt angry at him, he promised me he had used protection in each entanglement, but he must have made a mistake at some point for the pregnancy to happen. 

It was one thing to study through text books and another thing to experience it, honestly it felt so painful. 

“Don't worry, it's because it's your first time…you'll ease into it,” Varian wasn't clumsy like me, he seemed confident and nothing about the night surprised him.

I guess he was a natural while I wasn't.

Shelly came to see me regularly, each visit she nudged me towards telling him while my insides churned. 

3 days passed and the home kit was still telling me that I was pregnant, that was insane. But I consider does it make sense since I was of beta blood and ovarian was an alpha blood naturally any child heard between the two of us would be exceptionally stronger than others. 

That was when I did something stupid. 

In a fit of desperation I upped my dosage.

Before I knew it I passed out and when I woke up I was in the pack hospital, my mom pacing around in the room and Varian next to me squeezing my hand. 

I blinked until I was fully conscious and then my mom fussed over me until she had to leave because of an important meeting given only to me and Varian.

“Talia what happened? How did you end up like this?” 

I sighed.

“I think I have been stressing myself lately and–”

“Stress doesn't make blood roll down your thighs,” 

My lips stuck together for a second before I found my voice.

“Did that happen?” I said I was determined to feign ignorance.

“Tell me the truth, Talia, are you pregnant?” 

I sat up on the bed in a split second.

“Did Shelly tell you?” 

His eyes widened. 

“So you've already told Shelly? No wonder she wasn't shocked when I told her I suspected it,” 

I bit down on my tongue, then released it.

“How did you know?” 

He looked away, his eyes unable to meet mine. 

Now I was getting aggravated. 

“Varian, say something, how did you know I was pregnant?” 

“I just guessed,” he said, giving a flimsy response. 

This was the same guy who couldn't be in the same room as my tampons or hear the word ‘period’ without physically cringing. There was no way his natural leap of thought would have been pregnancy from what happened to me.

I badgered him before he finally told the truth and his head turned to the ground.

“That night, I think one of the c*ndoms broke,”