Anaka

“I know your old room was bigger. You must hate having to down grade. I know I would. I’m sorry you got forced here against your will.” Aunt Judy says as she steps into the room. 

“I don’t care about the room size. I never cared much for the material stuff. That wasn’t what made my life so sparkly. It was my friends, my brother, my dad, and acceptance. I’ve lost all of that.” My voice cracks as I turn to face her. 

“Oh, sweetheart. I know you think you have lost everything, but all you lost were you chains. The chains holding you back from being the beautiful soul you are. I know it feels hard now, but this is for the best. You will see that in time.” Aunt Judy encourages as she pulls me into a huge.

“Yeah, and what does a twenty-one year old do in Beldoore? Because I’ve been preparing to be a councilman’s mate like an idiot. Plus, I doubt whatever skills I have will be helpful here.” 

“You still play the piano and sing. I need help down at the nursing home I work out with entertainment. You can pretty much sing whatever you want within reason. I need someone in charge of entertainment, and I think you would be good at it.” 

“Fine, but I’m not changing old people diapers. I draw a line.” I reply, causing my aunt to laugh as she breaks our hug. 

“I wouldn’t put your sensitive nose near something like that. That would just be mean. If you are wondering, yes, everyone knows you are a halfbreed. It’s not necessarily the bad thing you think it is. Not here. Now, let's get some hot chocolate with peppermint schnapps.” Aunt Judy suggests. 

“Sounds good to me.” I agree as I follow her out the room. 

I don’t know what the future holds for me. I could be down and out about it, and I know there is a part of me that will be for a bit. However, I can look at this as a new start. I got lost in the dreams of those around me. I didn’t really want to be Robbie, but he was good looking, an alpha, and he was interested in me. Plus, I did have real feelings for him even they didn’t last as long as I wanted. I think I always knew he wasn’t fully into me like he said he was. Yet I was so afraid to look past the rose colored lens of false acceptance that I told myself I was just being silly. I pushed my fears away, even though I knew my fears were very true. 

Deep down, I believe I had my dad’s acceptance. To him, I was the thing he needed to spark a light in his life in dark times. Losing his mate was hard on him and while he didn’t love my mom, losing he was still hard. They had a friendship that could possibly have been more if she hadn’t of died. I was a good thing to my dad. I was the light in the dark and I think Reese resented me for that. Reese was always gunning for our father’s approval. He was harder on Reese because Reese is a beta where I was a delta. I know dad told everyone to take it easy on me in training. I was the fragile halfbreed, but I was still his daughter. 

I always felt a cold shoulder from Reese like he only put up with me because of dad. I guess that was true too because once dad died Reese took over my fate like it was his right. What is worse it was like he had been waiting to rip my world to shreds. He enjoyed it. I was a burden he refused to be stuck with. Robbie just joined the sick joke of pretending he wanted me. I can’t believe I bought we were a real couple just because he kissed me in front of people. I always told myself it was a good thing he didn’t want to hide our relationship when it didn’t matter in the first place. It was all a sick joke. They would all go on triple dates without me and the ones that were with me, Iris wasn’t far behind making videos to show her fans on social media that I was a loser. Everyone was in on it or so it appears. I was so afraid of the truth that I ignored until it came running me over like a runaway freight train. 

No more ignoring the red flags or the truth. Celeste was my home, but now it’s filled with pain. My dad is gone. My brother hates me. My fake boyfriend and friends have deserted me. My life feels empty yet free. I did always feel that I had to keep a certain persona on. That if I came off too weak or too bothered by something, I would fracture my own world. I was living in a false reality. Maybe it’s time to make a new world for myself. What else do you do when you hit rock bottom? You get back up and rebuild because staying down is giving up. I won’t give up. I will make the best of this situation.