Different Picture

Every time Z finished her shift, she took it as a hobby to stroll in the street. She had never once ridden any of the carriages, let alone buy goods for herself. That’s why she had no idea that a shadow’s energy was their currency. Even though she was working with Granny, she never accepted any salary because its her way of paying back, so no one could blame her for being ignorant. On top of that, anything to do with Pasithea was an instant shrug for her.

Feeling the breeze, she linked her arms around her waist, caressing her shoulders as she went. The Main Center had never been warm for her. In fact, where there’s a lot of Wielders was also where her lonely soul ate her whole being.

She walked past shoppers after shoppers, her breathing becoming heavier as the eyes equating in her direction felt like knives stabbing every part of her body it could reach. Their words have been her food for a long time. It’s one of the constant things revolving around her life.

All the same, she felt a pang of pain crushing her heart.

Just as she was about to succumb to her despair, she had a glimpse of a familiar curly hair in the sea of Wielders. Before she knew it, she’s already tailing her.

They passed fashion shops after salon shops wherein every exit, a transparent bag filled with cosmetics and make-ups hanged in her wrists. She was wearing a seductive flowy dress paired with killer heels. Her chest was puffed-out, shoulders squared, and head held high.

It became difficult to follow her when the sun’s half-portion hid in the mountains, allowing a rich golden light to penetrate the heavens before hailing it with the indigo’s tint.

Past the last shop, Z halted. Her feet were screaming for release, her heart pounding. She hadn’t realized how fast she’s walking until she couldn’t move farther.

Biting her lips, she slumped on the nearest post, closing her eyes and leaning against it. The fierce woman’s presence was nowhere to be seen again. She’s already gone.

Destiny seemed to be in contrast with her desires to meet her, as it always had been.

There was a swishing sound, and then, the shopper’s noise and the Shorne’s consistent neigh ceased. It’s as if she’d been separated from the rest of the world, and her only companion was the growing silence.

Looking left and right, she saw to her disbelief a midnight-black shadow coiling and uncoiling ten meters around her. It was as though she’s trapped below the ground with no fresh air to breath and no breeze to feel.

Her brows furrowed. Who would dare do this? She never had a friend or anyone to tease her. Basically, whoever wielded the shadow meant to harm her and it’s evident to the constriction of the air around her.

Out of the shadow whose features were now similar to a brick wall, came the woman she’s been tailing. She disposed herself with the shopping bags and the satisfied smile she’s nurturing when she’s shopping alone. Instead, there was malice curling at her face, her beetle-black eyes flickering.

“Well, well, well! Who’s been caught in the trap?” Michelle smirked. “Let’s see. You’ve been following me since earlier and not too long ago, you keep staring at me. What do you want?” Her eyes moved from her calloused skin up to her dry hair, and she felt the urge to throw up.

“It was just—I’m not—you know—”

Michelle elegantly put her forefinger to her wrinkling nose. “What’s that smell?” Noting that Z stopped explaining, she went on, “Go on, tell me of the truth. Who knows? I might not end your—ah—filthy life.”

Swallowing the lump in her throat, Z said, “I’m not here to hurt—”

With derisive laughter, Michelle’s flickering eyes softened for a moment. “Did—did you, honestly, think I will—I will let you hurt me?”

It took her a while to get a hold of herself. Extracting a handkerchief in her pocket, she dabbed it on her lips, her stabbing stare reigning once again. “Good news, ugly! I decided not to kill you for making me laugh that much.”

When she snapped, her shadow vanished, and the shopper’s noise came back as though nothing happened.

“This is the last time I will tolerate a filthy bitch like you for stalking me, okay? If you do this again, you’ll lose your head even before you can ask for it.”

Giving the unresponsive Z one sweeping look, she called a carriage, feeling the creeps crawling from her nerves. She didn’t know how a Wielder could stare like that. She’d never seen anyone like her. There was kindness in the way she gazed, but she felt the other way around. It’s as if she’s faking it. She shook her head, trying to erase the image of her hollowed pea-green eyes.

Z pursed her lips. She wanted to know her name, but her courage betrayed her. They haven’t even had a direct conversation. All she got was yet another threat which, unfortunately, she hadn’t even felt.

It’s an empty word.

Nothing could make her feel threatened than seeing a protector walking toward her. She looked at her back, expecting to see someone there, but there’s no one near the premises. Her sweats started falling, syncing together with the tremendous beat of her heart.

“Miss—”

“I didn’t do anything! It was the lady, she—she puts—there was a shadow here and—and—”

“Miss, calm down!”

“—she talks—threatened—it wasn’t me, I swear!” Tears glistened from her eyes, trickling down to her cheeks.

The protector sighed. “I’m only here to tell you that a post is not a bench, Miss! But I heard someone threatened—”

“Oh!” Z faked a laugh while waving her hands, secretly wiping the wet off her cheeks. “It’s nothing—I was just babbling about—I mean, it was nothing.”

“Are you sure?”

She nodded fervently, giving him a thumbs-up, trying so hard not to shake.

“Okay, but if someone threatened you, tell the protectors immediately. They’ll know what to do.”

“I will.”

The moment the Protector was gone, she breathed deeply. ‘Why are you being like this, self? You’re making me nuts!’ she thought, slapping herself. ‘This is so not you. You said you’ll never cry again, but you broke your promise.’

Deciding it’s better to find herself a place to sleep before seven o’clock, she exited the Main Center, shivering as she passed the protectors. It’s the singing crickets and the dimly lit street that greeted her, but this was her normal.

The street was her life.

Sure, Granny told her to live with them; however, she didn’t want to be a burden, and so, she chose to rest in a place where she could be alone, away from them. Sometimes, she napped under a tree, in the corner of the streets, or even in the forest.

As long, as no one’s around, she’d be fine.

Part of her reached this decision to intensify her madness. It’s been over a year since she woke up in Granny’s room. Yet, no one was looking for her. She inferred that she’d been abandoned, or else had been betrayed by the Wielder she knew. It used to give her nightmares. Faceless Wielder attacking her, killing her, but worst of all was a deep man’s voice who’s making her stomach rumble. He was selling her to yet another faceless entity. It, then, would end with her head rolling on the ground.

Not far from the Main Center, Z found an enchanted tree. Its surroundings were illuminated by fireflies. It has a full view of the bright full moon smiling beside itself, accompanied by thousands of stars that were blinking relentlessly. The tree was standing on a cliff. It has a broken branch were twinkling, green leaves rest. It looked comfy from where she stood.

Moments later, she’s already lying on its root. As expected, it was so comfortable to the point she instantly fell asleep, indifferent to the fact that she hadn’t eaten yet.

The crunching of a broken twig awoken her. Creeps ran down her spine when she felt someone staring at her. She looked around, the nerves in her head pulsating, but only the other enchanted trees were there. Not even the fireflies remained. They did leave the trails of their miniature bulbs, but it wasn’t as bright as their light.

Putting her hands on her chest, she slumped back to the root, her eyes intent at the stars. Sleeping outside for months made her sensitive to any ruckus. It’s a defense mechanism she’d learnt in the wild. She knew she’s vulnerable, but her instinct sheltered her more than she’d been protected by anything, by anyone.

Another broken twig crunched. Her heart started beating rapidly, just as her hand patted the ground, searching for anything that would help her defend herself. All she felt was the dust, though. Trying to calm herself, she reached out for a thin branch, breaking it.

“Whoever you are, I’m telling you, I’m armed!” She pointed her own-made weapon in the air, unsure where to point, her hand shaking together with her knees.

From the darkness prowled a short and spare figure. He’s releasing neither bad nor toxic intent. Narrowing her eyes, she tried putting faces she knew, pairing them to his body to identify his identity.

Relief washed through her when she finally recognized him.

“What the heck are you doing in the middle of the night, George?”

George frowned. “Are you not saying sorry?”

“Sorry for what?”

“Granny wants to see you.” He put his hands in his pocket. “Come on.” Without waiting for her response, he walked away.

Sprinting toward him, she egged, craning her neck to have a better look at his blank face, “What should I be sorry for?”

“Nothing.”

“Just tell me, George.”

“Stop badgering me, okay? I’m not in the mood.”

One of her brows raised. “Is this about the cloak again?”

“Tsk. Why ask when you already know the answer.” He glared at her.

“You’re so immature.” She shook her head, a bitter smile drawing her lips. “I thought you’ll understand where I’m coming from, but your just like them. You disappoint me!” Then she walked ahead of him, her footsteps heavy.

She hated those cloaks for it was one of the reasons why she’d been judged, why she’s been treated like a speck of dirt. It symbolized the Zorphean’s identity, but she was nowhere near knowing who and what she was. Thus, wearing it would look as though she’s a puzzle piece that was forced in a picture from which she didn’t belong to. She’s already shattered. Fashioning herself with it might be the mite of her already vague future.

They arrived in Granny’s Café with contempt-filled silence. The protectors were keen to know why they were still strolling late at night but George reasoned them out.

“What happened to the both of you?” said Granny, wearing a midnight robe, her face full of concern.

“It’s nothing,” both of them said rigidly.

Granny’s eyes gleamed. “You two are releasing red energy. Don’t you know that?” Her head turned from Z to George. “The other is pressured while the other is livid.” Looking at them directly in the eyes, she said rather sternly, “Spill the beans, or I’ll make you spill it.”

“She’s not accepting the cloak I bought—”

“I knew it.” A warm smile drew her face. With one snap, Z and George were already seated at the chair beside the counter. “Tell me more.”

Stunned, Z supplied, “He bought it without asking for my permission—”

“Why shouldn’t I? You’re going to disapprove—”

“You already know my answer, but you continue with your plans? What kind of a friend are you?”

George’s eyes dilated. “I—I did that for you! I was only concerned that Wielders were judging—”

“You weren’t concern, George.” She jerked her head, her lips pursing. “You were embarrassed—”

“I’m not—”

“You care too much of what the others will say that you forget to take into account what I’ll feel—”

“You’re being judged, okay? I don’t want that to happen to my friend—”

“I can accept their judgment, George. I’m used to it, but I cannot stomach you being like them—”

George clenched his fist and was already on his feet. “I’M NOT BEING LIKE THEM, Z! CAN YOU LISTEN TO ME FOR A MOMENT? YOU’RE BEING UNFAIR! IT WAS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD! IF ONLY YOU LOOK AT YOURSELF YOU’LL SEE WHAT—”

Z squared her shoulders and towered over him. “YOU DISGUSTING RAT! I DON’T CARE ABOUT HOW I’LL LOOK. YOU SHOULD LEARN TO ACCEPT ME OF WHO I AM, BECAUSE THIS IS WHO I AM, AND NO CLOTHES WHATSOEVER WILL CHANGE THAT!”

Both of them went silent after that, catching their breath, eyes glistening with tears. They were glaring at each other, wishing nothing but pain to crush the other.

Granny, meanwhile, was only watching them, her hand clasped together. “Is that all? You better let it out. Between you and me, I’d rather spill all of my grudges. After all, a Wielder who keep all of her emotions becomes a monster no one can control.”

An awkward air filtered around them. George brushed his nape before settling in his chair, his eyes uncomfortably moving away from Z and Granny. On the other hand, Z looked down, biting her lips.

“I won’t reprimand any of you for shouting in front of me, but let me give you a piece of my mind. There is nothing wrong for caring for each other, but we always need to check our actions whether or not it will cause pain for someone. After all, universal isn’t really universal.”

“I was only trying to—”

Raising her hand, Granny said, “Listen to me, George. Your efforts are appreciated, but you shouldn’t have done something behind someone’s back. It’s disrespectful.”

“That’s what I was saying, Granny. He doesn’t—”

“As for you, Z, you can’t just question someone’s affection for you. That’s offensive. I know both your ego were underlined but always be sensitive.” She breathed deeply, massaging her temple. “I guess both of you needs tea.”

Before Z could decline, Granny’s shadow already glided toward them with glasses of lavender tea. This flower was used in a variety of forms. It could be for a wound’s cure or for stabilizing someone’s emotion.

With Granny staring at them, they drunk, feeling a sweet liquid trickling from their throat down to their stomach. In an instant, a heat like no other surged through their consciousness, just as a cold sensation clouded their brain.

“Feeling okay?”

Both of them nodded with a small smile.

Granny waited for another five minutes. The tension melted in the air and both of her loved ones were already talking with sense. No one’s saying any apology, though. They’re just being careful not to tap the topic about that cloak again.

Clearing her throat, Granny announced, “I called you here, Z, to tell you of the students who came here earlier.”

Without knowing yet the reason, Z’s heart skipped a beat.

“They were looking for Blame and they left this picture here.”

Her shadow opened its palm, and from it, floated the picture featuring Blame.

George blinked. He snatched the photo and threaded the woman’s feature carefully. “Isn’t this you, Z?”

Z peeked at it and found herself laughing. “You’re kidding, right?”

His brows creased. “No, really. Look.” He propped the image beside her face, noting not only the resemblance but the intricate impression that they’re one.

“Stop fooling around, George. When did my eyes become blue? It has always been pea-green, and really, would you mistake that face to mine? I’m clearly prettier.”

He was about to argue when Granny stood beside them, bringing with her a round mirror. “George’s statement proved the theory I come up with. I believe that we see different features from you, Z. For example, I see you as a tall girl with pea-green eyes and heart-shape face, while George perceive you quite alike with the girl in the picture.”

Z’s jaw dropped. “How is that possible?”

Shrugging, Granny said, “I want you to look in the mirror first and tell me what you see.”

Doing what was told, she felt the world crushed her soul. “Who’s that?”

What she’d seen was a feature covered with a half-moon mask, its edges lined with golden dust. But the most horrifying of all were her eyes. It had different colors, the right was tainted with pea-green while the other was splashed with an oceanic blue.

“It is you, Z. I think the more appropriate question is what you are.”