II. Thoughts of escaping

I wake up sometime later, and I find myself on my mattress. How did I even get here? I feel naked beneath my dirty, thin blanket. The last thing I remember is being in the kitchen, Alpha Max beating me, and then nothing. And why does my body hurts so much? It usually hurt, but now I feel at least two bruised ribs. It hurts a lot while breathing.

I hear the horses nickering. I don't have a room in the Pack House, and I am forced to sleep in the stable, in an empty corner. At least I have a roof over my head because I used to sleep outside next to the dog's kennels.

"You are awake." I hear a voice that I knew so well.

When I turn my head, I see Ana crying. I hate when she is crying for me. On her left cheek, I see a bruise. Fuck! She probably got hurt trying to help me.

"I thought that the Alpha would kill you for sure. I have never seen him so mad. Mikael and Sergei stopped him before it was too late. When I saw how you looked full of blood, I feared the worst," Ana tells me.

I try to lift a hand to comfort her, but it hurts too much. Then I try to speak but fail. It takes me a few attempts until I manage to speak.

"You have a bruise on your cheek," I say, and my throat feels so dry. Talking hurts, like I have needles stuck in my neck.

I see her touching her cheek, "It's nothing, really."

"Did he hit you?" I ask her.

Ana bits her bottom lip and slowly nods.

"When I entered the kitchen and saw you full of blood, I had to do something. I tried to step between you and him, and it was then when he hit me. I don't think he realized. Mikael and Sergei saw everything and stopped Alpha Max before he could hit me again. Mikael even had a few harsh words for him for hitting me," Ana explains.

Mikael is a Gamma, a teacher, and Ana's mate. But she does not accept him because he used to treat me like anyone else. So now he mostly ignores me. And spends most of his free time tagging behind Ana.

"Who brought me here?" I ask.

"My father and me. My mother was blaming herself for what happened."

I close my eyes and try to inhale deeply, but a low hiss escapes my lips. A few moments later, I say, "She gave me food. Tell her it is not her fault."

"You have to escape. What if next time he kills you?" she sobs some more.

"Then I am free. I won't be tortured anymore."

Ana sob loud, "Don't talk like this! What if...? What if your find your mate?"

My mate. I hope I never find my mate because I am not worthy of a mate, not after what I have done to her. And my family got killed because of me. What mate would want me?

"What if I find my mate?"

"Maybe your mate will help you get away from here, and you will be happy," Ana tells me with sadness in her voice.

I never told Ana the truth of what I had done. I never talked about her. And not only what I have done to her, but because of me, my whole community got killed. Who could ever accept me as a mate?

"And what will I give a mate? I have nothing. I am nothing. My mate would probably reject me on the spot. Better that way. I am just a slave. And I will never be free to have a mate," I say with a bit of anger in my voice.

"Don't talk like this. Your mate will be happy to have you. You are an amazing guy, V. The best guy that I know, " Ana says, looking straight into my eyes.

I snort. Ana talks like this because she doesn't know the truth about me, and I am too of a coward to tell her what I did. Because the day I tell her, Ana will stop being my friend. Who would want a friend that has innocent blood on his hands? So much fucking blood!

"Once you are better, I will help you escape," Ana tells me.

"Ana..." I say softly.

"Listen. I have a plan. I contacted my cousin from Romania. He is from Moon Stone Pack, close to Timișoara. Once you are in Romania, he will come to look for you in Iași," she patiently tells me her plan. "He is a Delta in his pack, and he promised to take you under his wing."

I think about it, a moment. What if I can escape? What if I can be free? Even if Ana's cousin helps me get away, this doesn't mean I have to join his pack or any pack. I can be a rouge and live how I want.

I know that I still have to pay for my crimes, but I am tired of this life. So damn tired of all the torture I endure every day. If I escape, I will live a nomad life. Just me and my crimes.

"OK. Tell me your plan."

"On the next full Moon, Alpha Max will hold a party for his birthday. He will be too busy to be the center of attention to care for you for a night. You will escape when we bring the cake."

"I don't know. It sounds risky. Besides, he will know you helped me. What if he does something to you?"

"Mikael will protect me. You have to worry about yourself more!" she says."I also brought you new clothes. Your older ones were too ripped and full of blood. I threw them away. I made sure to rip the new one so that he won't say anything."

"Thank you, Ana. I would be long dead if not for you and your parents," I say honestly.

"Just get better so you can run away. Alpha Max said you should go back to work as soon as you are awake. I will tell him you are still asleep. Rest more. I brought you some food," and she takes out from her pockets some cheese, a boiled egg, and some bread.

She remains with me until I am done eating, gives me some water, and before she leaves, Ana makes sure I am comfortable.

"Sleep. The next full Moon is in five days."

Realization hits me. Will I be better in five days? Werewolves heal faster than humans, but because of the life I have, I don't heal as fast as others like me.

I try to sleep, but I only think about the plan that Ana has told me. It sounds too good to be true, but I want to try. I have to try.

My body hurts so bad in the morning, but I do everything to ignore the pain. First, I feed the horses, then the dogs. After that, I take more wood in the house.

When I enter the kitchen, the smell of warm milk with cinnamon and freshly made bread makes my belly growl.

"Hungry, you filthy slave?" I hear the cold voice of Alpha Max coming from the middle of the kitchen.

I lower my head so that I won't look him in the eyes.

"N-n-no, A-al-alpha M-Max," I say in a submissive voice.

"Can you talk like a normal person? Your stuttering drives me crazy. What are you, retarder?"

"S-s-so-sorry, A-a-al-alpha," I stutter even more.

"You won't be getting any food for five days. And clean the dining room. I want it spotless. In five days it is my birthday. If you make no mistakes during five days, I might give you something to eat on my birthday."

"T-thank y-you, A-alpha."

"Take the food to the dining room. The pack members are waiting for their breakfast."

Taking the breakfast makes me realize just how hungry I am. I am sure Alpha Max put me to bring food to the pack members because he knows how hungry I am. And he said I could eat in five days. I don't know how I will endure five days with no food if I already am so hungry. A few times I ate grass and tree bark.