It had been a month since my marriage and my husband hadn’t returned from the war. From what I had heard from my now habit of eavesdropping, especially from gossipy women on the streets and the maids who didn't notice my presence lurking by, our pack had been outnumbered by the enemy and their so-called “alliance”.
“They brought the Elves to slaughter the Alpha Leader! The messenger had stopped coming back here since that announcement,” one of the vendors exclaimed to her friend as I passed by their direction.
“Who knows if the Alpha Leader has already perished!” Another voice, was it Ella, the florist?
“If we lose our alpha leader, what will happen to this pack? For he still didn’t have any offspring to take over his position?”
“If the Alpha Leader dies, I sure hope he had impregnated that cultist whore!” It was loud enough for everyone to hear. It seemed they had noticed me passing by.
I turned to them and gave them a small, awkward smile. Despite their cries of mockery, I painted a smile, feigning ignorance. “Good morning, ladies. I hope you have a fine day early this morning.”
But I was only given a glare and a cold shoulder as they turned their backs against me.
“So, Ella, did Kozart buy any flowers today?”
“Of course, he said they were the loveliest roses he ever bought!” She replied as she giggled.
I stayed still, completely being ignored like a speck of dust that should have faded away, yet my smile didn’t falter as I…unfortunately, had got used to this routine.
Even before my new life, this had always been a normal occurrence. It had gotten only worse because this time, I felt alone.
Without the nuns cheering me up when a child threw a stone on my head.
Without Father Gossep singing songs to appease the non-believers.
I missed them…so badly. And I knew they were worried for my well being.
There were times I wished I could have visited the Hatiist Church and tell them I was…okay.
But I vowed to never step inside the Hatiist Church, I couldn’t even send a letter or else the tension could grow higher with the lack of news of the wolf warriors.
All I could do was to pray for Hati. To pray for the unending war to be stopped and...pray for Hati to return and save us all.
“Hey, you.”
I lifted my head, visibly surprised that Ella and the fruit vendor, Naureen, acknowledged my presence.
“Y-Yes?”
“It’s been a month now since you became the luna,” Ella sneered as she crossed her arms. “Are you carrying Lord Varick’s child?”
“I…” This is the only time they actually spoke to me and I was caught off-guard. My eyes widened, my throat suddenly felt dry and I couldn’t even say a word.
I should tell them that there wasn’t a new life in my womb.
That there was nothing after he...violated me.
Suddenly, I felt his hands gripping on my thighs as they spread my legs and thrusted without warning.
THE THRUSTING INSIDE MY TORN OPENING—IN, OUT, IN, OUT—IN! OUT! IN! OUT! IN! OUT!—AS I WAS WRITHING IN AGON—
‘Stop it! Stop it! STOP IT! STOP THINKING ABOUT IT!’ I dropped on the floor, pressing my hand on my chest, feeling my heart beat rapidly fast as I saw the beads of my sweat on the pavement.
Deep breaths, I needed to take deep breaths.
‘He’s not here. He’s not going to hurt you.’ I chanted in my mind, knowing this was the only way to reassure myself.
Fortunately, I came back to senses and realized I almost had another case of a panic attack...in front of the two female merchants giving me curious stares.
“A-Are you o—”
I stood up, shaking my head feverishly, took the basket of the produce and ran off.
The last thing I wanted them to hear is a pitiful Luna who couldn’t overcome her nightmares of that night.
I thought I had overcome it. I thought I could live my life, accepting that I would be the mother of the next in line of the pack.
But since there wasn’t any life formed in my womb, I thought as I continued to run away. Involuntary tears streaming from my eyes as I tried to ignore the stares of the pack…
…I was scared that he would do it again and again…and again until I bore him an heir.
.
I stopped by the alleyway, far from the sight of curious gazes and relieved myself by throwing up the bile stuck on my throat.
It was disgusting and nauseating but it freed me of this palpitating ache instilled in my being. As soon as I was done, I took out my water jug and gulped it in one go.Sun God, Hati…This is the life I have now, stuck in fear of the return of my husband. You could say I committed a sin of thinking…
…that I’m glad the war kept him busy.
Ever since I’ve left the church, these dark thoughts continued to loom over my mind and the only way to keep myself sane was through my prayers to Hati.
“I need to go home,” I said to myself as I tried to stand up.
Home wasn't the Hatiist church. My new home was that large house on the top hill, isolating itself from the rest of the pack.
After a month of solace, I started talking to myself or to Hati. Weeks in my husband’s house had proven to me that the maids were grateful if I do everything by myself.
And it felt better to do something instead of being cooped up in that bedroom.
For tonight’s dinner, I had every ingredient I needed so I must return back before sunset.
The streets were more somber than usual. With the lack of healthy men around, the streets weren’t as bustling as they should be.
Many injured soldiers were lying on the alleyway due to the increasing number of occupied patients at the hospital. The magicians were all taken during the war and what remained were disabled men, women, children and the elderly.
The pack’s kingdom hadn’t been the same for many years.
My thoughts were suddenly interrupted by a mug of honeydew beer placed in front of me.
I blinked and the mug was forced on my hands.
“For your nausea,” the voice of a young man said. He turned his back before I could see his face. “Take good care of yourself especially in times of war.”
He lifted his hat from behind as his way of bidding farewell and he left me alone, puzzled and lost, while my hands were holding the mug he left me.
Who was that?
Before I came back to my senses—let alone to even say my thanks, the man was long gone.
Now I looked at the wooden mug before me. It smelled of honeydew, an ingredient you couldn’t easily find around here.
A rarity that only the affluent in this pack could afford. I drank its contents and was surprisingly satiated after finishing the last drop.
It was the first time drinking such a luxury that it strangely calmed me right after.
Perhaps, there were still good people who didn’t care that I was from the Hatiist Church.
And I continued to feel good, knowing that Hati wouldn’t leave me.
“What are you doing here?”
My body quickly stiffened hearing that familiar voice from a short distance and I felt my throat suddenly dried up. The concoction spent earlier wasn’t enough to help me from this fear.
That he would return to take me…again…again and again…
My wrist was gripped by a metallic touch of someone’s hand and I was forced to turn to face once more with the real genuine appearance of my husband.
“You shouldn’t be here,” he said with gritted teeth and I knew that I worsened his already fouled mood.
Lord Hati, the man who made me experience fear, had finally returned.
And I knew my brief solace had ended.
Hello! If you like Alpha's Bridal Nun, feel free to comment! I would love to give my response to my readers (if I have time) and if you have questions, don't hesitate to ask but I won't spoil anything as well. It would ruin the fun, you know ;)
My eyes widened at Alpha Leader, Varick, in the flesh and not another case of hallucination. I felt my throat dry, my heart raced faster than normal as I started to experience another dose of an incoming attack.‘Deep breath, deep breath… you knew he would be coming back soon.’ I glanced at him carefully. Dark hair grew longer, unwashed and scruffy from the lack of care. He fashioned a beard, unsurprisingly untamed and his dark gray eyes observed the area. He was wearing his signature armor and it was more worn than it used to be. Once again, he was tainted by vermillion blood.Blood of the other wolves he had slain while he was away.His eyebrows furrowed, seeing my lack of response ticked him off as he tightened his grip, bringing me back to my senses.It stung. The grip made me flinch as I tried to wiggle my hand away from his tight lock.“I hate repeating myself. Why are you here?”“I…” I should think quickly or else I would only rouse his anger. My eyes wandered elsewhere, try
Okay, calm down, Rosaria. It’s impossible for him to die with a shove like mine. He had been through a lot from this endless war and it would be…laughable if he would have died from a measly push from a lower ranking luna. I tried to calm down and now I was eyeing him carefully. I took a deep breath before placing my trembling hand on his wrist, ignoring my hallucinations of the hands around my waists as I tried to check his pulse. It was faintly weak. Weak but not dead! I sighed once more but more relieved than earlier as I tried to decipher what really happened. His face is pale, giving off an impression of a lifeless body that I assumed earlier. And he…wasn’t breathing at all. ‘They brought the Elves to slaughter the Alpha Leader! The messenger had stopped coming back here since that announcement.’ I recalled Naureen mentioning them and a realization came to my mind. Now with his dark gambeson, I muttered an apology and pulled out his heavy garment from his head. I turned re
A long time ago before wolves ever landed on earth, there was the Moon Goddess, an unknown entity residing on the moon, and her brother, the Sun God. Two mythical wolf gods were formed after Fenrir, the first recorded wolf, left them on Earth. These were moon wolf, Skoll, and sun wolf, Hati. Skoll was attracted to the sun and chased after it whereas Hati, whose motives were unknown till this day, chased after the moon. When Hati finally caught the moon, he swallowed it whole, making the chosen wolves lose their ability to transform. “What?” I interrupted and I gave a skeptical look at the image of Hati. “Why would the sun god do that, Father Gossep?” I was five years old when Father Gossep told me this story. Father Gossep chuckled as he patted my head. “Hati only wanted to cleanse the Moon. Otherwise, we wouldn’t have the moon now if he would have eaten it.” “Why did the sun god need to cleanse the moon?” “Some recorded stories stated that the moon had been corrupted and Hati
When I woke up, it was already dark. The discomfort I felt came from the hard concrete floor where my body lay after I fainted, which had brought me back from my sleep. Another was experiencing a different kind of pain, rather it was more of discomfort, that was spent from the magic I used beyond my limit. Oh right, I thought to myself. I turned to see the Alpha leader sleeping on the floor next to me, I should bring him to bed. It was the least I could do after he fought the war for our pack. However, when I tried to lift my body, I couldn’t move. Perhaps this was the consequence of using an advanced spell. It was a miracle that I successfully extracted the poison without fainting midway. I was glad that I secretly practiced the Lycan scrolls during my youth. I sighed as I relaxed on the floor and I felt awkward being next to the man who was responsible for this. Speaking of which, what was that earlier? I was mixed with a lot of emotions that overwhelmed every ounce of logic.
I continued to sob as I laid in a fetal position on the other side of the bed. I attempted to hide my despair yet my body continued to shake from the feeling of his essence still inside of me. Anger and humiliation only roused these tears as I wiped them, feverishly. A woolen blanket was placed on top of my bare, defiled body and I grimaced. “I don’t need your pity, Lord Varick.” “Ah, so you do have some backbone left. I thought you church maids were like lambs, blind followers of a deceitful shepherd.” I didn’t answer as I was overwhelmed with the tears flowing once more. “Crying is for the weak, what do you gain from it, woman?” “WHOSE FAULT IS IT THAT I FELT LIKE THIS?!” I yelled but the effect only made my swollen cheek hurt. “You cried over a trifle deed,” he says, coldly. “This pain wouldn’t be nothing compared to childbirth.” Words of mockery only sparked more anger as I gritted my teeth. I was certain he had no idea what childbirth felt and he had no right to lect
“Shall I wash your hair, Lady Rosaria?” Lenalee asked as she caressed the strands of my hair. “Ah, n-no, I can do it my-myself,” I stammered and I quickly pursed my lips before I uttered another humiliating word. She had a look of a small, whimpering dog after my response. “I understand, my lady.” And I felt my heart being torn from seeing her expression. But then again, I allowed her to bathe me and that alone was humiliating enough. Since coming here, I thought I was fine doing what I needed to do as I was capable of cooking and cleaning on my own. The maids were silently glad that they didn’t need to attend to my needs. After all, we the noviates are capable of doing them and independence was one thing we were taught growing up. But now, the Alpha leader sent them home and was replaced by one young maid. I didn’t understand his way of thinking anymore. She used a warm towel to wipe the dampness of my arm. I caught sight of her staring longingly with admiration before she
I hadn’t seen this marketplace so bustling and alive before. There were street performers dancing to beautiful foreign music, the bars were even open during this day as the men were frolicking every opened bar, taking all the tables. So the barmaids had to add more tables outside. When one of them caught sight of Varick, he raised his arms and greeted him. “LORD VARICK! It’s rare for you to be outside!” An old man with a brown eyepatch stood up as he patted his back. When he caught sight of me, I flinched and stared on the ground. “I take it you were having fun with your luna last night?” My eyes widened at such awkward familiarity and I looked up, waiting for Lord Varick’s response. He shook his head as he frowned. “You’re drunk even when the sun’s up, old man. Be grateful that the enemies weren’t here to strike us now.” “My lord, don’t forget to enjoy every now and then. You’re still young, after all.” His eyes darted on me before he grinned. “Make sure to keep him happy, Hati
So how could I describe my husband after our rare encounters? He was a monster who attacked my adoptive father, forced me into this marriage just because the Moon Goddess gave her answer to the Seer, defiled me not once but twice on two separate occasions and now he said he didn’t desire me. I may not be knowledgeable about the lovemaking process, but after some visits to the library, it was clear how it should be done.We “both” didn’t enjoy this, and we just hated each other more than I thought. It was all for the sake of impregnating me and seeing how people were receptive to his death was a normal occurrence in the Skollist pack.After all, before him, his ancestors didn’t live to see their child grow older and that was why Lord Varick who finally had his fated mate, needed an heir as soon as possible.You could say I both hated and pitied him. It was a confusing feeling right now.I sighed as I leaned on the largest oak tree in the middle of the marketplace. Lord Varick had left