CHAPTER 1

Julian’s POV

It took two months, two whole months for the perfect world I thought I was building to come crumbling down, just like I’d always feared it would. But to think today would be the day? That, I could’ve never predicted.

In those two months, so many things changed. If I dare say, I changed too.

The pack had finally begun to heal from the chaos of war. With Aries and Rex doing their best to rebuild, the Awoke Pack was thriving again. The danger that once loomed over us was gone, and for a moment, it felt like peace had returned.

Everything was almost perfect again, except for that dull ache that overwhelmed us whenever we visited Lilly’s grave. Even then, time had done its best to ease the guilt we all carried.

Rex and Aries finally got the chance to live like normal mates, and they made sure we all suffered through their sweetness. Even Zane and Rose were in their own little honeymoon phase, constantly attached at the hip. The pack was moving forward, stronger, happier, united.

Everyone was moving on from the war. Everyone except me.

I tried to do the same, to live, to laugh, to focus on love and family but behind all the smiles I wore, I was still trapped in a prison of my own making. Fear of being found out, of confrontation—kept every part of me on edge no matter how hard I tried to push it away.

Still, I’d come to terms with one truth: I didn’t regret what I’d done.

The elders deserved to die. That fact no longer haunted me, it freed me. But even then, I knew I couldn’t escape punishment when the time came. What I regretted wasn’t the act itself, but the deceit—hiding it from everyone.

Sometimes, I wondered: if I’d told Aries the truth from the start, would things have turned out differently? Would he have helped me find a way out? The thought offered no comfort. It didn’t matter. It was better me than anyone else.

As long as they were happy, that was enough for me to keep going for now.

But that morning… the morning everything I feared came to pass, I realized my so-called preparations were never enough. It hit harder than I ever imagined.

I should’ve known it was too good to be true when I woke up with my legs tangled around Robin’s, his steady breath warm against my neck.

He’d been my anchor, more than he even knew. Just sitting with me through my nightmares, grounding me when I woke screaming he gave me strength without realizing how much it meant.

He had questions; I could see them in his eyes. Why I barely slept. Why I always looked haunted. But I was scared, scared that if I told him the truth, the only person holding me together would finally let go.

So I did what I always did. I hid behind my fading humor and practiced smiles.

I should’ve known something was wrong when I slept peacefully that night and woke up feeling lighter.

“I think whatever you were dealing with has finally let you go,” Robin said softly, leaning back against the headboard, eyes fixed on me. “You slept pretty well for the first time in months.”

“I’m as surprised as you are,” I admitted, even though I was thinking the same. Was the fear finally loosening its grip on me? Could I actually move past this?

“Instead of being surprised, you should be thankful, dummy,” he teased with a grin, and I couldn’t help smiling back. I’d always smile for him, no matter how heavy things got.

“I’m thankful and surprised,” I said lightly, resting my head on his shoulder.

Silence filled the room—a rare kind of peace. But I broke it anyway.

“Any new schedule today, our new Delta?” I asked, smirking when his grin widened.

He’d officially been named Delta after the joining ceremony, taking Lilly’s place. No one deserved it more.

“First of all,” he said, “stop calling me new Delta. I’m just a Delta.”

“You just assumed the position a few weeks ago,” I shot back. “That’s still new.”

He rolled his eyes. “Nothing major today—just training in the evening unless Aries assigns something special. We basically get to lounge around.”

“So it’s a free day then,” I said, only for him to flick me lightly on the head.

“Didn’t you hear me? There’s training—led by the Beta.”

“Zane already offered to take over those duties from me,” I said with a sly grin.

He blinked, realization dawning. “I guess it’s a free day for you, then.” He leaned back again. “You should probably check in with Rex too, you know how she gets if she doesn’t see her Jully for a day.”

I smiled faintly. It wasn’t like I was avoiding Rex at least, not intentionally. But she could see through me, through all my walls, and that made it harder. She’d blame herself if she knew what I’d done, and she didn’t deserve that. She was happy now. I wouldn’t ruin it.

“I’ll drop by her office when I’m ready,” I murmured, watching as Robin got up to dress.

“Where are you going?” I asked.

“You seem to forget it’s almost noon,” he said with a smile. “We need food. And before you ask—no, I’m not bringing any up for you today.”

I rolled my eyes but grabbed my shirt. “I’ll be right behind you.”

Before I could finish dressing, a sharp voice cut through.

“What are you doing here this early?” Robin asked.

I turned to see Zane standing in the doorway, his expression unreadable.

“We have unexpected guests,” he said flatly. “And they’re demanding your presence.” His eyes flickered between Robin and me. “Both of you. Alpha Aries asked me to get you—it seems… serious.”

Robin nodded, but I froze.

“We’ll be right there,” Robin said quickly.

“Good,” Zane replied before walking off.

Robin turned to me. “Let’s go.” His gaze pierced right through me.

“Go first,” I said softly, forcing a calm tone. “I’ll be right behind you.”

He hesitated but nodded and left.

I took a deep breath, pulling myself together. It could be anything, I told myself. Anything at all.

But deep down, I knew.

If this was what I thought it was, if this was that day then maybe this was how my story was meant to end.

Maybe this was how I’d finally stop running from my sins.