I fell into a deep sleep and found myself reliving some of the most horrid memories of life. First I was in the dungeon with Hannah again and she was beating me to the point the pain then it went numb. I still remember the thought of death and the taste of my blood pouring into my mouth. Then I switched to the smiles of Rogan at the waterfall and suddenly I heard Athena’s cackle. The cackle stole my whole word and then I tasted Hannah’s blood in my mouth before seeing Rogan disappearing into the trees. I felt myself trying to scream and begging for help but it went nowhere. The louder I screamed the more it felt like nothing moved and I just kept trying then I heard his voice, “Hey Kellina, just relax, I’m right here.” I woke up shaking and I must have been saying his name for him to react that way. I felt his arms wrap around me with a feeling of trying to keep me safe as he whispered in my ear. “I’m right here. You were just having a dream.” The feelings of sparks and
No feelings, no emotions, just walking through life as a corpse. Feeling the only burn inside of a red hot flame burning your mind into tiny cinders of nothing. It’s everything and everyone that causes your despair, pain, and heartbreak. Your brain eating away with tiny nibbles because of the complaints you have against yourself. Slowly you make yourself uglier and more pathetic until there is nothing left but empty space where once was a normal human being. The pressure of continuing life becomes so strong that the only way to make it easier is to watch the blood drip out of your body. A long silver blade ignites your only final resolution. Naturally, hell is not the perfect face or the perfect body, and it is certainly not the perfect life. It is alone with the constant ache of a love that will never come to pass. There will be no fluffy marshmallows passing by your dark baren existence or beautiful ladies with long feathering wings granting wishes. Hell is like an inferna
I woke up to the sun rising above the hill taking in the beauty and my mind instantly went to Kellina. I imagined how I’d find her today likely crumpled up somewhere in that large room that once shared the love of Rogan and her. Many times she’d be in the closet buried in his clothes. I could tell she had cried herself to sleep once again and had landed wherever she chose. Although her powers had grown and she was stronger than ever before her body had sunken and the weakness in her heart was something felt by the entire pack. Her emotions were capable of affecting us all and the longer there was no sign of Rogan the longer she suffered. I had tried a million different things even providing her mood stabilizers, counseling, and allowing her to go on search missions that always ended up coming up with nothing. She was just as bad as the Alpha was now both lost in their own will to try to find Rogan. I was grateful that my mate killed long ago in the first Red Cresent Moon attacks di
I woke to the sense that she was near although I’d never seen her or mentioned a word to anyone. I was terrified that if anyone knew that I may have my true mate nearby that they would finally end this weird charade I’d been playing the Mystic Moon Pack for the last several years. It was ironic that she’d be her and I couldn’t help wondering if she could feel me too. I imagined a thousand times what she must look like but it didn’t truly matter because the odds of me ever seeing her were slim to none. I had thought about telling my little wolf Kellna but the idea of upsetting her or making her feel like anything less broke something inside me every time I came close to getting the words out. My poor little wolf was not the same as she was when I first saw her that sense of hope and resilience was lost since my old pack took her mate away and not just any mate the future Alpha which weakened the pack forever. I had been devastated myself when it all happened because it was never th
Every time I kissed her, every time I touched her skin, every time I was inside her I knew I shouldn’t be something plagued me to stop was it because I had never officially renounced my pack when I’d left? Or was it the woman he came to me in my dreams constantly pulling me towards her? I couldn’t tell Athena how I felt because when I did, I could see her heart breaking, and that killed me inside. After all, I was marked as her mate and she was marked as mine. Still, my mind wandered whenever I had a chance to be alone to think of that woman that was always in my dreams with her pale skin, and white hair except for the ends dripped in dark red with a body that any man would melt for. Who was she? In the end, it didn’t matter because my life was here now deep inside the mountain inside the caves. I needed to find more food and more supplies for our wolves. The children needed better education, we needed better health care for the elderly, and overall, our pack needed to learn an
The Sun beat on my face and my eyes opened with my first thought being of Rogan. My dream had taken me to the top of the mountain and the feeling that he nearly overcame me. My face was wet with the tears I’d cried even as I slept with the idea of simply seeing him. Just as I saw him thought something took him away just as fast and he vanished in a flash of hot red mist. I took a moment looking around just sitting where I was. These days it didn’t matter where I slept or what I did anyway. I surprisingly was in my today wrapped in one of Rogan’s shirts. I was struggling with the fact as time went on they were smelling less and less like him and more like me. I refused to allow anyone to wash them or take them. The Luna had tried once and I think she quickly realized that was a bad idea. I had luck by my side because the Alpha felt similar to me and I did utilize that to my advantage. I had barely turned when I heard knocking on my door I already knew who it was and sure e
I made my way down the stairs hoping to avoid any of the Alpha family but instead, I ran smack down into Roe. She was older now getting ready for puberty but yet still a little girl. Roe had beautiful black locks with curls at the end which made her positively adorable and hard not to resist. I realized she was running from Corgan who was chasing her laughing. “Oh Save me Kellina from my awful brother!” She exclaimed. “Oh, Roe you are the silliest,” I responded still pulling her behind me and squaring up with Corgan. He stopped and took note of the situation. Corgan had changed so much and looked more like a man now than he did when I’d first met him. He had looks similar to Rogan but leaner still very muscular and handsome with shorter hair than Rogan ever wore but still those same dark beautiful eyes. Anyone female wolf would be lucky to have Corgan as a mate. “This really isn’t fair.” Corgan folded his arms standing in front of me. “Still it’s good to see you Kel, arising from
She was furious on the mat and I wasn’t even trying to fight her. I knew she was hurting and was just tired of trying to keep going so if she wanted to put her energy into kicking my ass right now, I was going to let her. It did mean me holding back but since the day I meant Kellina I’d be holding back how I felt or really wanted to do in one way or the other. I had never seen another wolf be as broken as she had been in her life and still come out swinging. It was respect, complete awe of how she kept going, and love that made me feel this way. I had no mate of my own but had been told a thousand times how those feelings were for everyone else and so now watching her try to overcome losing her mate the way she had with no clue if he was alive or dead I could barely imagine she was here with me now sparring. Thud! I landed again on my back as she used all of her small frames to literally flip me over her shoulder. I tried to keep my smile inside my head so she didn’t know ho