Chapter 11

Clare

I watched Arielle from across the ballroom.

She was standing beside Tori, but her eyes were on me.

Good.

At least she understood now.

I wasn’t going anywhere.

I had spent the last few minutes listening to everyone around me talk about Arielle.

How beautiful she was.

How perfectly she had planned the party.

How lucky Joss was to have such a wonderful mate.

Every compliment had irritated me more than the last.

Because none of them seemed to remember one important fact.

I was Joss’s mate too.

His second fated mate.

The Moon Goddess had chosen me for him.

Yet somehow, everyone looked at Arielle as though she were the only woman who mattered.

I couldn’t accept that.

I wouldn’t.

I glanced toward Joss.

He was still watching Arielle.

Even from across the room, I could see the love in his eyes.

That was what hurt the most.

It wasn’t the bond.

It wasn’t even the fact that I was second.

It was the way he loved her.

The way his entire expression changed when he looked at her.

The way he had immediately worried about hurting her.

The way he had barely been able to look at me without guilt because his heart was already hers.

I clenched my jaw.

I didn’t blame Arielle for being his first mate.

But I did blame her for acting as though that meant I had no place beside him.

I was not going to disappear quietly.

I wasn’t going to return to Golden Fern and pretend none of this had happened.

And I certainly wasn’t going to watch Joss continue living as though Arielle were his only mate.

If Arielle wanted to believe she could simply push me aside, I needed to make one thing very clear.

She couldn’t.

I picked up my glass and slowly made my way toward them.

As I approached, Tori noticed me first.

Her expression immediately hardened.

Interesting.

She was protective of Arielle.

That could become a problem.

Or perhaps an opportunity.

“Clare,” Arielle said.

Her voice was polite, but I could hear the hurt underneath it.

“Arielle.”

I smiled.

“Are you enjoying the party?”

She stared at me.

“Not particularly anymore.”

I pretended to be surprised.

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m sure you are.”

Tori stepped closer to Arielle.

I ignored her.

My eyes remained on Arielle.

“I wanted to speak with you.”

“About what?”

“Joss.”

Her expression tightened.

Of course it did.

“I don’t think there’s anything you need to say to me about him.”

“There is.”

I took a breath.

“I know this isn’t easy for you.”

Arielle gave a bitter laugh.

“No. It isn’t.”

“I don’t expect you to be happy about me.”

“Good.”

“But I need you to understand something.”

Her eyes narrowed.

“What?”

“I’m not going anywhere.”

Silence.

Tori’s expression became even more guarded.

Arielle stared at me.

“I didn’t ask you to.”

“No.”

I smiled faintly.

“But I think part of you hopes I’ll decide to leave.”

She didn’t answer.

She didn’t need to.

I already knew.

“You need to understand that this bond isn’t something I can simply switch off.”

“I know.”

“And neither can Joss.”

“I know that too.”

“Then you understand why I have a right to be here.”

Arielle’s eyes flashed.

“A right to be here?”

“Yes.”

“You’ve known him for what? An hour?”

“Does time change what the Moon Goddess has decided?”

“No.”

“Then you understand.”

Her jaw tightened.

“I understand that you’re his second mate.”

“Exactly.”

“And I’m his first.”

I looked directly into her eyes.

“I know.”

The words were simple.

But I could see how much they meant to her.

She needed that distinction.

She needed to believe being first gave her something I could never take away.

Maybe it did.

But I wasn’t prepared to let it stop me.

“I don’t want to take your place,” I said.

It was only partly true.

I didn’t want her place.

I wanted mine.

I wanted Joss to look at me the way he looked at her.

I wanted him to think about me.

To want to be near me.

To choose to spend time with me.

And I would make sure that happened.

Arielle studied me.

“Then what do you want?”

I looked across the room at Joss.

He was talking to Carlos, but his attention wasn’t really on their conversation.

His eyes kept drifting toward Arielle.

I turned back.

“I want the chance to know my mate.”

Arielle’s face fell.

I almost felt guilty.

Almost.

“Clare…”

“I know you love him.”

Her eyes filled with tears.

“And I know he loves you.”

That admission was painful, but I needed her to understand that I wasn’t blind.

“I can see that.”

I stepped closer.

“But his love for you doesn’t erase the bond between us.”

She swallowed.

“No.”

“And I won’t pretend it does.”

Tori finally spoke.

“You’ve made your point.”

I looked at her.

“I have.”

“Then leave her alone.”

I smiled.

“I’m afraid that’s not going to happen.”

Tori’s eyes narrowed.

I turned back to Arielle.

“I don’t want us to be enemies.”

“Neither do I.”

“Then don’t treat me like one.”

Arielle stared at me for several seconds.

“What are you planning?”

I smiled.

“Nothing.”

She didn’t believe me.

Good.

I wasn’t planning anything terrible.

I was simply going to make sure Joss had the opportunity to know me.

I would talk to him.

I would spend time with him.

I would ask him about his life.

I would learn what he liked.

I would become someone he looked forward to seeing.

And slowly, without forcing anything, I would become impossible for him to ignore.

If Arielle thought she could monopolise his time simply because she’d been there first, she was mistaken.

I had no intention of demanding that Joss abandon her.

Not yet.

That would only make him resent me.

No.

I would be patient.

I would let the bond work in my favour.

I would give him reasons to come to me.

Reasons to stay.

Reasons to want more.

And if Arielle became uncomfortable with that?

That wasn’t my fault.

The Moon Goddess had given me Joss too.

I wasn’t going to apologise for existing.

I looked across the room again.

Joss had finally finished his conversation with Carlos.

His eyes immediately found me.

Then they moved to Arielle.

I watched the conflict cross his face.

Guilt.

Love.

Confusion.

And something else.

The pull of our bond.

I smiled.

He couldn’t ignore it forever.

Neither could Arielle.

I turned back to her.

“I think you should know something.”

“What?”

“I’m not asking you to give Joss up.”

She looked surprised.

“I’m asking you to accept that I have a place in his life too.”

Arielle’s eyes hardened.

“We’ll see about that.”

I smiled.

“Yes.”

I turned away.

Because that was exactly what I wanted.

For her to understand that I wasn’t leaving.

I wasn’t disappearing.

And I wasn’t going to spend the rest of my life standing in the shadows while everyone called Arielle the only woman who mattered.

She had been first.

Fine.

But being second didn’t mean being forgotten.

And I was determined to make sure Joss never forgot me.

Not for one second.

No matter how much Arielle hated it.