Chapter 4

Sarah's POV

I hugged my knees tightly against my chest.But nothing could calm me.Not the cold rain.Not the darkness.Not even the silence surrounding me.

I had spent my entire life searching for peace.I had prayed for it.Begged for it.Dreamed of the day when I could finally wake up without feeling like something was wrong with me.

But perhaps peace simply wasn't meant for someone like me.Maybe I had never been meant to have it.Rain poured from the sky, soaking through my clothes until they clung painfully to my skin.

I didn't move.I couldn't.I just sat beside the trash, staring at nothing.My bracelet was gone.

Zion was gone.My family was gone.Or maybe they had never really been mine to begin with.

A shiver ran through me.I wrapped my arms tighter around myself.

I'm alone.

The thought settled heavily in my chest.Not once did Mom come outside.Not once did she ask if I was okay.Not once did she call my name.

She knew I was out here.She knew it was raining.

She knew I was sick.And she still didn't care.

A bitter smile touched my lips.Of course she didn't.Why would she?I was only Sarah.The weak daughter.The wolfless girl.The daughter they had spent years wishing was someone else.

Eventually, I forced myself to stand.My legs shook so badly I almost fell.I caught myself against the wall.Every muscle in my body screamed.

I was freezing.My teeth were chattering.But I dragged myself inside.Water dripped from my hair and clothes, leaving a trail behind me as I slowly climbed the stairs.

Mom shouted something from downstairs.I didn't turn around.For once, I didn't care what she wanted.Why should I listen?

No one in this house had listened when I was the one begging.No one had cared when I was hurting.So why should I keep pretending they were a family I could depend on?

I reached my room.Closed the door.And finally allowed myself to fall onto the bed.

••

The next morning, a loud knock on my bedroom door jolted me awake.I groaned and buried my face deeper into the pillow.

My entire body ached.My head felt heavy.For a moment, I didn't remember where I was.Then everything came rushing back.

Zion.Jasmine.The rejection.The bracelet.The garbage.

I squeezed my eyes shut.I wished I could go back to sleep.I wished I could wake up and discover that all that  never happened.

The door suddenly swung open.

"Get up."Mom's voice.

I didn't move.

"Your sister is being officially inducted as the Luna today."

My stomach twisted.I knew what she was going to say next.

"Alpha Zion requested that the entire family be present."

I opened my eyes.For a moment, I simply stared at the ceiling.Then I whispered,"I'm not going."

I pulled the blanket over my head.I couldn't do it.I couldn't sit there and watch Zion place a crown on Jasmine's head.I couldn't watch the man I loved give my sister the title I had dreamed about my entire life.

I couldn't smile.I couldn't pretend.I just couldn't.

Mom yanked the blanket away.

"Get up this instant!"

I flinched.

"Go take a bath and get dressed."

I looked at her."I said I'm not going."

Her eyes hardened."I dare you to miss this ceremony."

I swallowed."Please."My voice came out weak.

"I don't have to be there."

"Yes, you do."

"What's the point?"The words escaped before I could stop them."Why do you want me there?"

Her expression didn't change."You think I'm joking?"

"No."

"Then get up."

She turned toward the door."You're going whether you like it or not."

The door slammed behind her.

I stared at it.Then slowly pulled my knees toward my chest.Why couldn't they just leave me alone?Why was it so difficult to let me grieve?I had lost everything.

Wasn't that enough?

Did they really need to make me watch my replacement receive the life that had once been promised to me?

A tear slipped down my cheek.I wiped it away angrily.I refused to cry again.At least not in front of them.Reluctantly, I got out of bed.

••

After a quick bath, I stood in front of my wardrobe.I stared at my clothes.

Nothing.No beautiful gowns.No elegant dresses.

No new shoes.Just old tops and trousers.

I reached for one of the dresses hanging at the back.

I remembered wearing it years ago.Jasmine had gotten a beautiful new dress that same week.

Mom had told me I didn't need one.You already have enough clothes.

I had believed her.Back then, I hadn't understood.Now I did.A bitter smile crossed my face.

Of course.No one had bought me anything nice in years.Why waste money dressing the daughter who would never be Luna?

I picked a simple top and black trousers.I tied my hair into a neat bun.No jewelry.No makeup.Nothing that made me look like I belonged at a Luna ceremony.

Maybe that was exactly how they wanted it.

When I reached downstairs, Mom was waiting.She looked me up and down.Disappointment flashed across her face.

"I don't know how you ended up so different from your sister."

I stared at her.For once, her words didn't make me shrink.

"Maybe..."My voice was quiet."...you should have paid as much attention to me as you did to Jasmine."

Mom froze.Just for a second.Something flickered across her face.

Guilt.

I couldn't tell.But then it disappeared.

"We're getting late."She turned away.

And that was it.No apology.No explanation.Nothing.I followed her outside.

•••

The drive to the mansion was painfully short.I wished it were longer.I wished the car would keep driving.Anywhere.Somewhere far away from the Moonlight Pack.

Somewhere no one knew my name.But eventually, the car stopped.The moment I stepped out, I felt it.

Eyes.Dozens of them.Maybe hundreds.Whispers spread through the crowd.

"That's the rejected mate."

"I heard the Alpha didn't want a weakling."

"She doesn't even look worthy of being Luna."

"Look at the way she's dressed."

Each word reached me.Each one found a different wound.But yesterday had already taken something from me.I was too exhausted to let their words destroy what little was left.

Mom leaned toward me."This is exactly why I wanted you to marry that man."

I didn't look at her.

"At least people would stop talking about you."

I said nothing.What difference did their opinions make now?They had already decided what I was.

They said I was Weak, Broken and Unworthy.

I walked inside.The grand hall was beautiful.

Silver and white flowers decorated every corner.

The Moonlight Pack's crest hung proudly above the stage.Hundreds of guests filled the seats.

Everything looked perfect.Except me.Our family's table was near the front.I stopped when I saw the place cards.My name was there.

Sarah Marcus.

I stared at it.A bitter laugh escaped my lips.

Of course.Jasmine wanted me close enough to watch her take everything that was supposed to be mine.

She wanted me to sit here. She wanted me to Watch, Smile and Suffer.And pretend I was happy for her.

I slowly sat down.She won.The thought hurt more than I wanted to admit.

I lowered my gaze.A small, broken laugh escaped me.

"Congratulations, Jasmine."I whispered it so quietly no one could hear.But saying it felt like swallowing glass.

"Ladies and gentlemen..."The host's voice echoed through the hall.

Everyone turned toward the stage.I didn't.

I couldn't.He spoke about the Moonlight Pack.

About strength.Unity.Leadership.The importance of the Luna.His words became nothing more than distant noise.

Then I heard the words I had been dreading.

"And now..."The hall fell silent."the Alpha and his Luna."

The grand doors slowly opened.My heartbeat stopped.Then his scent reached me.

Zion.

That familiar scent.The scent that had once meant home.Now it only hurt.My eyes lifted despite everything inside me screaming not to look.

And there he was.

Zion.

He looked breathtaking in his ceremonial Alpha robes.He always did.And he knew it.For one stupid, painful second, I forgot everything.

I imagined myself walking beside him.I imagined his hand reaching for mine.I imagined the crowd cheering.I imagined the crown on my head.

I imagined him looking at me the way he used to.

Then I saw Jasmine beside him.Reality crashed back into me.My chest tightened.That should have been me.The thought came so suddenly that I almost couldn't breathe.

That should have been me.I looked at Jasmine.

She was smiling. She look Proud and Beautiful.

And Zion was looking at her.Not me.

My eyes burned.I looked down.Don't cry, I told myself . At least Not here.

Don't give them that.Then—Pain exploded inside my head.

I gasped.My hand flew to the side of my face.

"What..."

Another wave hit. It was strong and sharper . I winced.

The room suddenly seemed to tilt.Mom glanced at me.

"Sarah, what's wrong now?"

"My head..."I struggled to breathe."It hurts."

She rolled her eyes."Don't start pretending."

I stared at her."What?"

"We didn't come here for one of your dramatic scenes."I couldn't believe her.

"I'm your daughter too."My voice cracked.

"Can't you see that I'm serious?"

She looked away."I've heard enough excuses from you."

Excuses.I swallowed painfully.I wasn't pretending.Something was seriously wrong.

The pain was spreading.From my head down through my neck.

My vision flickered.Across the hall, I saw Jasmine.She was watching me.And then she smiled.A small, satisfied smile.

I pushed myself to my feet."I need some air."

No one stopped me.No one asked if I was okay.

I walked out.The hallway blurred around me.My head felt as though something was clawing its way out from inside my skull.

I pressed my hand against the wall."Just breathe."

My knees weakened.I stumbled toward the restroom.The moment I got inside, I grabbed the sink.

Cold water.

I turned on the tap and splashed it across my face.It didn't help.

The pain became worse.Much worse.I gasped.

My fingers tightened around the edge of the sink.

"What is happening?"

My reflection stared back at me. I look pale and Terrified.

Another wave struck.My knees buckled and I cried out.I couldn't breathe.I couldn't think.I couldn't see properly.

I slid toward the floor, desperately searching for something to hold on to.

"Help..."

My voice was barely a whisper.I tried again."Someone..."

My throat tightened."Please..."

Tears filled my eyes.Was this really how it would end?I pressed my hand against my chest.

"Please..."

The pain became unbearable.My vision darkened at the edges.I could hear my heartbeat pounding in my ears.

Then—The restroom door burst open.

Strong arms caught me before I hit the floor.

"It's okay."The voice was familiar.

Too familiar.

"I've got you."

My body went still.Slowly, I lifted my head.

Through my blurred vision, I saw a familiar face.

Those eyes.That face.The man who had broken my heart yesterday.

Zion.

And before darkness swallowed me completely, one terrifying thought crossed my mind.

Why did he come back for me now?