Chapter 16

Chapter 16

ELENA

Not a sound. Not a whisper. Not even a breath of air. My lips moved. My throat worked. I was screaming as hard as I had ever screamed in my life, but the room was completely silent.

I grabbed my throat with both hands. Panic crashed through me like a wave.

"There," Silas said gently. "That's better."

I tried again. His name. Just his name. Silas. I pushed it up from my chest with everything I had.

Silence.

I tried to say help. I tried to say Kade. I tried to say fire.

Nothing.

Silas walked over to the table. He picked up a small piece of paper and a stick of charcoal that Hilda used for writing labels on her jars. He held them out to me.

"Go on," he said. "Try."

I snatched them from his hand. I pressed the paper flat against the table and held the charcoal over it. I was going to write it. I was going to write his name in big black letters and show it to everyone in this house.

S.

That was all I had to write. Just the first letter.

My hand wouldn't move.

It hung over the paper, shaking. I pushed. I pushed so hard the muscles in my arm started to burn. The charcoal hovered a hair above the page and stayed there, like there was a wall of glass between them.

The charcoal snapped in my fingers.

I stared at the broken pieces. At the empty white paper.

Then I looked up at him, and the tears came. I couldn't stop them. Hot and silent, pouring down my face.

"I know," Silas said softly. He reached out and wiped a tear off my cheek with his thumb. I jerked away. He only smiled. "It's frightening, the first time. It gets easier. You'll learn to live with it."

He picked up the tray and set it closer to the bed.

"Eat your soup," he said. "You need your strength."

He walked to the door and unlocked it. Then he stopped with his hand on the handle, and he looked back at me over his shoulder.

"Oh," he said. "One more thing."

I stood there shaking, my hand still around my throat.

"That dagger I gave you in the ring," Silas said. "The one for luck." His smile grew wider. "Who do you think told me to give it to you?"

My whole body went cold.

No.

No, that wasn't possible.

Kade had been standing right there. He had frowned. He had nodded. He had said, Take it.

Take it.

My mind started racing. Kade, who wouldn't tell me the truth about anything. Kade, who always said not yet. Kade, who knew my mother's name. Kade, whose wolves wore the colors that burned my village.

Kade, who had turned white as a sheet when he saw that silver pin. Who told me to hide it. Show it to no one.

Why? To protect me? Or to protect someone else?

I shook my head hard. No. He had bled for me. He had knelt in the dirt of the ring with blood pouring out of his side. He had carried me through the dark.

But he had to. Didn't he? If I died, the bond would hurt him too. Maybe he needed me alive. Maybe that was all I was to him. Something he had to keep breathing.

Silas watched my face. He looked pleased, like he could see every thought as it crossed my mind.

Then the door behind him swung open.

Kade stood in the doorway.

He was covered in dust from the road. His hair was messy, and there were dark shadows under his eyes. But when he saw me standing by the bed, his whole face lit up. Relief poured through the bond so strong it almost knocked me over.

"Elena," he breathed. "You're awake."

He took a step toward me.

Silas laughed. It was a warm, easy, friendly laugh. He reached out and clapped Kade on the shoulder and squeezed it tight, the way brothers do.

"She's all yours, brother," Silas said.

And Kade turned to him and smiled.

A real smile. Warm and grateful. The same smile he had given me in the training yard.

"Thank you for watching her," Kade said.

"Always," said Silas.

I stood there with my hand around my silent throat, looking at the two of them in the doorway. The alpha and his beta. Shoulder to shoulder. Smiling at each other like nothing in the world was wrong.

And the last small piece of hope inside me cracked and broke.

They were in it together.

They had always been in it together.